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Blanked Out Reviews, Y5

By Blankments, in Create A Year Of Movies (CAYOM)

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Blankments Global Phenomenon

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5. Penelope Cruz in Steel Streaks

 

@Xillix

3. Daniel Henney in YIN

 

@Slambros

2. Anya Taylor-Joy in A Woman in the Crowd

4. John Williams in Fantasia: The Next Dimension

 

@Rorschach

1. Mary Elizabeth Winstead in T H E  S C A V E N G E R  W A R S: P A R T  I I

 

@cookie

 

Congrats to everyone!

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Blankments Global Phenomenon

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Full list:

 

1.    The Scavenger Wars: Part II


2.    A Woman in the Crowd
3.    Yin
4.    Fantasia: The Next Dimension
5.    Steel Streaks
6.    24 Hours
7.    Olive the Other Reindeer
8.    Best Friends
9.    Bambi: A Life in the Woods
10.    American Dragon: Flash Point
11.    The Epsilon Syndicate: Union of Thieves
12.    Static Shock
13.    Two Lonely Bounty Hunters
14.    Perfect Match
15.    The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl
16.    Sylvarius
17.    ByteRealm
18.    Texans Hate Zombies
19.    Peak
20.    Crusader
21.    The Rich and Famous
22.    Pillars of Eternity: Never Far From the Queen
23.    The Three-Month Funeral
24.    Wi-Fi Winnebago
25.    Lieutenant Lynx in the Third Dimension

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Blankments Global Phenomenon

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Remainder of the reviews are below:

 

 

July
Calendars – I really like the idea of this, but in allowing the filmmakers to really express theirselves and their opinions on it, the interesting premise of the doc loses focus among the infighting. Shame, because I think this is a neat idea either way. 3/5

Up the Butt – Huh? How was this legally given a wide release? No. 1/5

Skyjumper – Gets more than a little outlandish at points, but this is a decently made sports drama, that rarely feels generic thanks to it’s excellent cast and tight editing. 3/5 

The Rich and Famous – eh… okay, this is very good and starts off well, but then a pure lack of clarity takes over the film. Like, I’m usually forgiving of typos but there are so many here that actually matter to the plot that I can’t just keep PMing Spaghetti for clarification. Moreover, the thematic elements at the end pop up out of nowhere and it doesn’t feel to me like it’s given the time it’s needed. I appreciate stories like this, but ultimately, I wanted a bit more. 3.5/5

Static Shock – a rollickingly fun blockbuster that takes inspiration from several other films, but doesn’t feel all too derivative to hurt. It’s a bit long and it rushes the origin, but it’s fun and features cool action scenes. Basically Spider-Man: Homecoming with some actual personality, I dug this. 3.5/5

(this all said, I’m curious why there are now three separate DC franchises by the same studio that are very clearly set in separate universes. But I guess that’ll be figured out sometime down the road.)

August
Sylvarius – A nice rollicking fantasy tale. I wasn’t 100% into this; Numbers generally goes harder fantasy than I like but this was alright all around. A good cast and a solid mythic story made me like this! 3.5/5

Yin – one of the most unique films I’ve read since returning to CAYOM or possibly ever. It feels like a slow descent into madness that’s ending feels like the ultimate punchline. It makes no sense because it was nonsense, or was it? I think Espinosa is a bad choice as director, but besides that, this was a really fucking insane movie in the best possible way. 4.5/5

He-Man III: The Horror of Hordak – the end felt a bit rushed but this did have a lot of awesome action moments among the still silly story. This franchise is very consistent but I can’t say I didn’t enjoy this as much as the others. 3/5

Peak – a significantly better young adult film than the other NJP release this year, it’s got an intriguing plot and solid drama among its characters. A very nice film. 3.5/5

September
Train 38 – an intriguingly trippy film, but unfortunately, it falls into lazy casting and even more bizarre plotting. Things happen just to happen, and it doesn’t feel earned much at all. Eh. 2.5/5

Texans Hate Zombies – a nice silly B-movie that doesn’t overstay its welcome and has enough fun setpieces to work. 3.5/5

24 Hours – a very good crime drama that doesn’t truly excel at anything besides it’s good ensemble. We’ve seen all of this before, but it’s told well and with good panache. I was just hoping something a bit more transcendent with the hype it had received. Still very good. 4/5

Bambi: A Life in the Woods – I’m not a fan of the stuff in here that goes grotesque out of nowhere along with the very serious nature of the entire thing. Yet, near the end it does start to feel a bit transcendent. It’s very ambitious and not all of it worked for me. Yet I still appreciate the effort here. 4/5

Dolphins – cute! But still a slightly blah doc. 2/5

Psychonauts – the manic nature of this gave me a huge headache. Eh, sorry, it felt unstructured and is one of those “total mess” movies. Wasn’t into it at all. 1.5/5

October
The Picture of Dorian Grey – some people are easily forgiven of these type of films. I, however, am not. 1/5 

This Is Not a Game – Predominantly self-serious while actually being silly, it’s still a decent mid-budget thriller that I can commend on that basis alone. 2.5/5

Fantasia: The Next Dimension – A remarkably consistent collection of shorts. This is very different from the typical movie in this game, and as such I enjoyed the thought put into the individual shorts, along with the musical selections. Hard to go wrong with a Fantasia movie executed this well. 4.5/5

The Trick-or-Treater – I would’ve legit upped this a star if you specified Jacob Tremblay played the killer. As is, 1.5/5

November
American Dragon: Flash Point – finally, Steve Carell’s casting pays off! I dug this one a lot, but not as much as the other two. This is partially due to stuff out of Xillix’s control, but I also feel like even before the truncated third act, pacing is a bit off here and it relies a bit too heavily on callbacks to previous films. Still, it’s a satisfying ending, and I did very much enjoy it. An underrated franchise in 3.0, this has been a very good trilogy all around. 4/5 (would be a 3.5 if it weren’t for the truncated climax being out of your control)

Homebound – for Tyler Perry, you can do a lot worse. 2/5

 Of Pagans and Paupers – this feels absolutely nothing like an Andrea Arnold movie lol. It’s a decent enough drama but it ultimately feels underdeveloped rather than mysterious in its esoteric nature. You could do worse, but it wasn’t for me. 2.5/5

Pillars of Eternity: Never Far from the Queen – Again, I’m sorry Numbers, but this high fantasy franchise is just not for me. I can appreciate the craft involved and the great action sequences coupled with decent drama, but otherwise, it’s hard for me to engaged (although this was better at that than the first film). Sorry man. 3.5/5

The Winter Star – a decent set-up that becomes blah melodrama. Hard to imagine anyone wanting to see this with so many better options out. 2/5

Lieutenant Lynx in the Third Dimension – A cheesy, fun B-movie. Enjoyable! 3/5

Sabrina – to be brutally honest here, this is essentially unreadable. A cross between a screenplay and a CAYOM film, it breaks the rules of both while also having no line breaks. There may be something good with the story here, but I wouldn’t be able to tell you. Sorry slambros, this is really rough. 1/5

December
Help! I’ve Fallen and I Can’t Get Up: The Movie – I wish it was a little longer and more detailed, I legitimately love dumb movies like this and Jonny Jonny. As it is, merely a filler. 1.5/5

O, Maestro! – perhaps a bit too indulgent for me, this is still relatively charming and features a strong premise, although the details about are merely weird for the sake of being weird. It’s alright. 3/5

On the Record – It’s cute! As a musical fan I enjoy this, but yeah, the plot is super thin. Okay. 3/5

The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl – It’s got some casting issues and my usual problem of too much fourth wall breaking, but this is a fun movie. I wanted a lot more of Speedball than I got though; the scenes with him and Squirrel Girl together gave me the most Nefcy vibes. A fun superhero comedy, although it lacks much of a lasting impression. 3.5/5

The Scavenger Wars Part II – Okay, let’s get this out of the way first. I thought the first one was a much tighter film with better pacing all around and a more intriguing conflict at its core. This introduces a ton of concepts the first film didn’t even remotely hint at while dropping dangling plot threads. All this said though, it’s a lot more ambitious than the first film, and (well, back to the negatives) Certain elements didn’t work for me. Sunn is an annoying character and I’m not sure why Sasha Lane’s character, being the highlight of the first half, kinda disappears for an obvious reveal at the end. Granted, Sal looks to be left in a place to return for the sequels, but I hope she gets more development in a lot of ways. OKAY, now that that is out of the way, let’s look at the positives. Really great action sequences, Lucina’s character is really well-done (although lacking a strong arc for me personally), and the third act is really quite impressive in every sense. My favorite part bar-none was Foster’s role who is smartly done and generally an intriguing presence. I think the multi-villain aspect is where this lost its focus to me with Ares feeling a little underdeveloped. This review reads a lot more negative than my thoughts on the film, but basically, this swung for the fences and hit more than it missed for me. It’s just easier to talk about the misses because I can identify those better than my general enjoyment I had while reading this. I imagine this franchise will continue to be one I really enjoy, but, to compare it to another SW franchise, in real life, I prefer to watch The Force Awakens although I appreciate The Last Jedi more. That’s how I feel with these two movies so far. Perhaps if I ever revisit this (maybe around the release of III), it’ll overtake the first film. For now, I feel like I can’t totally look past the flaws for me to enjoy it. 4.5/5 (Also sorry cookie, but I didn’t wanna paragraph break this just for the lulz)

 

Thanks y'all for paying attention! I'm immediately leaving for a movie so I'll respond to everything when I'm back haha

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cookie Global Phenomenon

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19 minutes ago, Blankments said:

Sunn is an annoying character and I’m not sure why Sasha Lane’s character, being the highlight of the first half, kinda disappears for an obvious reveal at the end. Granted, Sal looks to be left in a place to return for the sequels, but I hope she gets more development in a lot of ways.

 

 

 

Well, you are getting a lot more of both in Part III, so...

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cookie Global Phenomenon

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4 minutes ago, 4815162342 said:

 

Wait I thought Part 3 was gonna be the Joel/Kira/Tamara's ex story....

Spoiler
'Spoiler'

No.

 

Not when I had to split Part II's story in half and left so many plot threads dangling.

 

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YM! Global Phenomenon

YM!

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24 minutes ago, Blankments said:

(this all said, I’m curious why there are now three separate DC franchises by the same studio that are very clearly set in separate universes. But I guess that’ll be figured out sometime down the road.)

Fun fact: Blue and Gold was supposed to start a cinematic universe with a Hive Team New Mutants esque spin-off that would’ve lead into Young Justice, as well as Green Lantern, Flash and Supergirl. But I realized that some work better separate and that is what I like. Blue and Gold will be a buddy comedy series, Static Shock is more teen oriented and Green Lantern will evolve into a full out space epic.

 

Spoiler

However I have been kicking around an idea of a Crisis on Multiple Earth film

 

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YM! Global Phenomenon

YM!

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45 minutes ago, Blankments said:

Help! I’ve Fallen and I Can’t Get Up: The Movie – I wish it was a little longer and more detailed, I legitimately love dumb movies like this and Jonny Jonny. As it is, merely a filler. 1.5/5

What about Jonathan Testicles?

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