SLAM! Posted October 5, 2019 Author Share Posted October 5, 2019 SLAM! REVIEWS: MAY ISSUE SPOTLIGHT Spoiler MASS EFFECT: ASCENSION dir. Jack Bender I'm going to admit now that I didn't actually read the first Mass Effect all the way through. I skimmed it. And I decided to read this second film in the series without the context of the first one. I'm not proud of that. But I'm admitting it now because I think it's a very interesting tidbit of information to help people understand where I'm coming from with this review. This film blew me away. There's a real electric surge that draws the viewer into its story. Numerator Pictures combines its passion for police procedurals with its passion for scholarly blockbusters to craft a refreshingly small-scale film that exists as a fascinating other-side-of-the-coin to the Spark franchise. Not only this, but I was enraptured despite not having read the first Mass Effect all the way through, the same way a newcomer could've been enraptured by Star Trek: Beyond without having seen the first two films. The performances are all great; I get the vibe that the entire ensemble really cares about this project. Director Jack Bender does a great job making this gritty sci-fi story come to life, while whoever's in charge of the editing is just giving audiences a master-class. Tony Kebbell as Garrus Vakarian is a cool addition to the franchise who probably deserves an Oscar nomination. I gotta say, I really was blown away by this film. It's a blockbuster, yeah, but it's this scholarly, elevated blockbuster, a film that prides itself on going above and beyond. I was floored. Now I really wish I hadn't skimmed the first one. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 5, 2019 Author Share Posted October 5, 2019 May Reviews and Scores Mass Effect: Ascension Numerator Pictures combines its passion for police procedurals with its passion for scholarly blockbusters to craft a refreshingly small-scale film that exists as a fascinating other-side-of-the-coin to the Spark franchise. 9.5/10 Brickleberry: Armoogedden A film that which is beyond stupid. People are going to lose their jobs over this one. 2/10 Lumberjanes: Secret of the Eye The film provides two-fold what it lacks in substance, those being style and a great film for kids of all ages. It's a dry enough year for Supporting Actress that I'm willing to propose Kiki Layne as a nomination for the role of Jen. 7.75/10 Double Chronomance A film with great acting from the whole ensemble that ultimately confuses the viewers a bit too much. But the song "Time and Time Again" by Owl City deserves a special mention. (I'm going to vote for it.) 7/10 Green Arrow Charlie Hunnam is fantastic as Oliver Queen, and the film provides a treasure-trove of great action sequences courtesy of director Chad Stahelski. 9/10 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 5, 2019 Author Share Posted October 5, 2019 SLAM! REVIEWS: JUNE ISSUE SPOTLIGHT Spoiler RHINO RIDERS dir. Dean DeBlois I have to hand it to Dean DeBlois. He was able to chorale a bunch of rhinos together and have them race each other. And the races, I'll say, are an aptly thrilling feature to the film. However, there's something about the film that simply irks me. I'm sure the filmmakers know that, in real life, humans do not race each other on rhinos. Right? The mere suggestion is preposterous. I hope next time, Hunt Productions is able to provide a more accurate picture of reality. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 (edited) 9 minutes ago, SLAM! said: However, there's something about the film that simply irks me. I'm sure the filmmakers know that, in real life, humans do not race each other on rhinos. Right? The mere suggestion is preposterous. If Donkey Kong can race on rhinos then damn it, so can we! Edited October 5, 2019 by cookie 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ethan Hunt Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 I honestly find that to be the most ridiculously bizzare complaint to have about the film lmao 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ezen Baklattan Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 I mean that review reads COMPLETELY tounge in cheek. It's certainly a....choice for the spotlight. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ethan Hunt Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 "How dare this kids movie not be based entirely in reality!" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 5, 2019 Author Share Posted October 5, 2019 (edited) June Reviews & Scores Teyonnah and the Renegades: The Righteous Sextext Each part of the anthology is well filmed by Boots Riley and Nia DaCosta, but I don't think the films end up fitting together very well. The cast is great all around, though. The library story's my favorite. 7.25/10 The App: The Jeremy Renner App - The Movie 😐 5.75/10 USS SeaWolf The film underutilized Gareth Edwards as a director by sidelining action in favor of tension. Nevertheless, it must be noted that Matt Damon and Paul Dano--especially Paul Dano as the emotional core of the film--do more than enough to carry the film on their shoulders. 8/10 Forgiveness A film about college admissions tom-foolery has never been more necessary than in this current moment, but I really don't think this was the most exciting story that could've approached the subject. 6.5/10 Rhino Riders I'm sure the filmmakers know that, in real life, humans do not race each other on rhinos. Right? The mere suggestion is preposterous. 5/10 Bummer Camp Well, on the bright side, I get to cross "bad Adam Sandler movie" off on my Y6 bingo card. 3/10 Edited October 5, 2019 by SLAM! 2 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ezen Baklattan Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 Score for Forgiveness? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 5, 2019 Author Share Posted October 5, 2019 1 minute ago, Spaghetti said: Score for Forgiveness? Sorry about that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 5, 2019 Author Share Posted October 5, 2019 3 minutes ago, SLAM! said: The App: The Jeremy Renner App - The Movie 😐 5.75/10 @Blankments I should expand on this: I do think this was pretty funny in parts; I loved the joke where the parents are trying to console the kid by telling him to watch a Jeremy Renner movie. There's just something about parody/satire films that don't impress my inner pretentious film critic, is all. That should've been my review blurb instead of the emoji; I'm sorry about that. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blankments Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 2 minutes ago, SLAM! said: @Blankments I should expand on this: I do think this was pretty funny in parts; I loved the joke where the parents are trying to console the kid by telling him to watch a Jeremy Renner movie. There's just something about parody/satire films that don't impress my inner pretentious film critic, is all. That should've been my review blurb instead of the emoji; I'm sorry about that. It’s all good; no worries; EGK just wants feedback when it’s her only movie this year lol 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ezen Baklattan Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 @4815162342 if I have to fight you for #1 I don't want to ruin our friendship but.... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rorschach Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 Me realizing that the next month up is July Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 7, 2019 Author Share Posted October 7, 2019 So I've been reading the July films throughout the weekend. Spent most of the day's free time playing Fire Emblem: Three Houses. I just finished Borrasca, but I'm gonna read De Blob tomorrow; I need some time to gather my thoughts on Borrasca and it's 11:30 where I am (in other words, past my bedtime). My goal for tomorrow is to post July and August, at the very least. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 7, 2019 Author Share Posted October 7, 2019 July, August, and September are coming tonight. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 8, 2019 Author Share Posted October 8, 2019 SLAM! REVIEWS: JULY ISSUE SPOTLIGHT Spoiler *DOUBLE FEATURE* Spoiler PLUS ONE dir. Nicholas Stoller Plus One has all the makings to be the romantic comedy hit of the summer. Nicholas Stoller crafts the feel-good event of the year by presenting a beautiful love story told through the point of view of Blankments Production Studio's signature hilarity. Adam Driver and Tessa Thompson both give memorable turns as the two protagonists. The writing is top notch, with a myriad of memorable moments embedded in the script. I'm not saying it's perfect, but I'm saying it's a really darn good time. Spoiler BORRASCA dir. Fede Alvarez In order to fully discuss Borrasca, I need to address the plot twist of the film. I'm going to place that discussion in the spoiler box below. If you haven't read Borrasca yet, I highly recommend you go back and discover the plot twist for yourself before reading this section of my spotlight. Spoiler I live in Wilmington, NC, a town that is unfortunately credited as a hot-spot for human trafficking. I think there might be a few reasons for this, but the major one has to be the fact that it's a port town. People are coming and going pretty often. This plot summary had me brainstorming about my own town, how we're able to measure how drastic of a trafficking vista the town is without the policeman putting a stop to it. I stop to wonder if the trafficking is run by people with a cursed justification for what they're doing, just as the men do in Borrasca. There's not too many social issues that boil my blood, but there are a few--injustice, littering, and modern enslavement. I always frown when I see the wall of missing people (most of them around my age) when I walk out of Sam's Club. Modern enslavement must be discussed, and it must be put to a stop. People may be stating that Borrasca's twist is a bit of a hard left turn, but I want to say that I really appreciate this film for discussing such an important topic in the way that it did. Execution is everything, and I found the execution to be brilliant. The rest of the spotlight is down below: Fede Alvarez has made a disgustingly layered mystery film in the form of Borrasca. It handles dark themes in a brilliant way and manages to unnerve its viewers all the way through its runtime. There is excellent writing, acting, music, editing, and cinematography present. The sound design is particularly brilliant, never missing a moment to utilize the metallic whirring sound that emanates within the distant mountains. Every performance is great, but if there is one specific performance I am most passionate about highlighting, it is Karl Urban's turn as Mr. Walker. There is an utterly disgusting twist behind the character, and throughout the film, Karl Urban is able make known the presence of a dark secret without going anywhere remotely close to revealing the presence of a dark secret. It's a complex and layered performance that I really appreciated, and I think he deserves an Oscar nomination. Borrasca is an incredible film that walks the fine line between child-imagined make-believe horror with real-world horror, and its discussion of a serious societal issue makes it one of the most important, necessary films in CAYOM history. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 8, 2019 Author Share Posted October 8, 2019 (edited) July Reviews and Scores He-Man IV: Sons of the Serpent A fun blockbuster that manages to be a slight step above its predecessor. A solid technical showcase. 7.25/10 Plus One I'm not saying it's perfect, but I'm saying it's a really darn good time. 9/10 The Academy Garth Davis does his best with the film that is given to him, but The Academy ultimately chokes the audience, as it is much too overstuffed. Also, the film does not give much of a reason for audiences to care about it. 5.5/10 God of War: Kingdom Come The blockbuster is a prime example of style over substance, though the makeup team continues to nail the look of Kratos. 6.5/10 Borrasca Borrasca is an incredible film that walks the fine line between child-imagined make-believe horror with real-world horror, and its discussion of a serious societal issue makes it one of the most important, necessary films in CAYOM history. 9.75/10 Hoops 2 The film brings nothing new to the table, and it's also lazily shot. Talk about a double-dribble. 4/10 De Blob Margot Robbie and Richard E. Grant give performances that match the colors of their characters. This is a very fun time at the movies and a great film for children. 8/10 Edited October 8, 2019 by SLAM! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 8, 2019 Author Share Posted October 8, 2019 SLAM! REVIEWS: AUGUST ISSUE SPOTLIGHT Spoiler HIRED GUNS dir. Davie Michod I thought this was a pretty interesting western. It doesn't feel particularly new, but it does have some great aspects. Numerator Pictures has always handled the camaraderie of an eccentric group of people fairly well, and things aren't any different from that norm. At the same time, the films never lets go of its grit. In my eyes, the film managed to combine the best aspects of two recent Western remakes: the camaraderie of Antoine Fuqua's The Magnificent Seven, and the mid-Aughts brooding grit of James Mangold's 3:10 to Yuma. I wish I had more to say about it. As I said, I don't think it feels particularly new. It's fairly traditional in its approach. But that traditional approach does have at least a little bit of merit, which is why I find Hired Guns to be a notable release. I can't wait to see how the studio handles Red Dead Redemption. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SLAM! Posted October 8, 2019 Author Share Posted October 8, 2019 August Reviews & Scores Tommy Danny Boyle has a style which makes itself known, but a few of the film's creative decisions (notably the choice to give the deaf protagonist a background singing voice) and mismatches of the film's tone ultimately bog the musical down. The "We're Not Gonna Take It" moment serves as the kind of cinematic moment which makes an engaged audience pump their fist in the air. 6.5/10 3:38 AM The timestamp title is accurate because people will be checking their watches during the runtime. 2.5/10 Hired Guns In my eyes, the film managed to combine the best aspects of two recent Western remakes: the camaraderie of Antoine Fuqua's The Magnificent Seven, and the mid-Aughts brooding grit of James Mangold's 3:10 to Yuma. 8/10 Wolves The documentary provides howling good time at the movies... if you are already a fan of nature docs. If not, it's, unfortunately, not really groundbreaking. 7/10 Broadway Selects: Network It's very beautiful that the Broadway Selects organization provides a way for the masses to see broadway productions without having to pay too much money. This is another excellent choice for the organization to share, though the emotional effect remains mitigated by medium discrepancies. 8/10 The Girlfriend Hoax This isn't a story that necessary needed to be told through the medium of documentary, though the execution of the film is rather brilliant. 8.25/10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
