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SUR(VI)VOR Ep. 6: Hustle Through The Heist!

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@captainwondyful @chasmmi @Claire of Themyscira @DAJK @elcaballero @Fancyarcher @JJ-8 @Keanu @PanaMovie @Rorschach @Sheikh @Spaghetti @StarWarsMemer @Thanos Legion @Wrath @YourMother the Edgelord @ZeeSoh

 

*The contestants line in front of an art museum.*

SLAM!: Howdy, Survivors! Today, each team will be responsible for pulling off the heist of a world famous painting!

chasmmi: One week, the competition is ridiculously easy, and the next week, the competition is ridiculously complex…

PanaMovie: (cocks an eyebrow) Looks like I'll finally be having some fun…

SLAM!: Here's the rundown. Team Asgard will be stealing the Mona Lisa!

YourMother the Edgelord: Mona's Pizza?

Keanu: Nice WarioWare reference!

YourMother the Edgelord: Huh? I just misheard him…

elcaballero: Mona Lisa is my favorite painting! I love how ambiguous her smile is…

(StarWarsMemer gulps.)

SLAM!: Team Sokovia will be stealing Nighthawks!

Wrath: I'm sorry… What painting is that again?

Rorschach: That's the 40s/50s painting with the people in the diner.

Spaghetti: I love that painting! It's so colorful yet somber!

(Fancyarcher grits his teeth.)

SLAM!: And Team Wakanda will be stealing Andy Warhol's painting of the Campbell's soup can!

Claire of Themyscira: Ugh. My definition of Pop Art is a portrait of Xtina. Not whatever this thing is.

JJ-8: Yay! I love canned soup!

ZeeSoh: Good. Maybe then you'll pull off a great score like you did last time.

(DAJK nervously twiddles his thumbs.)

 

CONFESSIONAL - StarWarsMemer: I'll be honest. I'm not excited to participate in this heist. I personally believe that stealing is wrong… I don't want to steal anything, even if it's just for a game…

CONFESSIONAL - Fancyarcher: For the first time this season… I feel alone. Like no one's gonna help me but me. Looks like I need to prove myself right here and now.

CONFESSIONAL - DAJK: An art museum heist… Hmm… Should I be aggressive or subtle… The heist is aggresive, but the paintings are subtle…

 

(captainwondyful pulls Claire of Themyscira aside.)

captainwondyful: Listen, Claire. I'm sorry I threw the tack at your balloon in the last challenge.

Claire of Themyscira: Ah. Finally, you admit it.

captainwondyful: I'm saying this because… Well… This is the type of challenge where we need to have good cooperation. And that's not possible if a blood feud is getting in the way.

Claire of Themyscira: I suppose you're right. And I'm sorry for spitting on you. That wasn't like myself.

(They shake hands.)

 

CONFESSIONAL - captainwondyful: Am I truly sorry about the tack? Absolutely not.

CONFESSIONAL - Claire of Themyscira: I told that 'b' what I needed to. No way we ain't still enemies in my book.

 

(Sheikh has Team Asgard huddle together.)

Sheikh: I believe that, to pull off a successful heist, we must understand what we're stealing. The Mona Lisa is groundbreaking precisely because of its equilibrium. How the colors support each other, how the Mona Lisa's mood blends in with the background, and--

Thanos Legion: I have acquired the painting.

chasmmi: Excuse me? We haven't even discussed a game plan yet and you've already stolen the painting?!

Thanos Legion: This imbalanced world charges for art when it ought to be free. I simply went into the museum, grabbed it, and walked out.

elcaballero: That shouldn't even be possible!! The paintings are supposed to be heavily guarded!! How were you not subdued?!

(The museum security pours out of the building and begin running towards Team Asgard.)

Sheikh: What do we do now?!

Keanu: I see a van over there! Let's drive away in that van!

chasmmi: But who's going to drive the van?

(Thanos Legion flashes a wolf-like smile.)

Thanos Legion: StarWarsMemer should do it.

StarWarsMemer: Huh?!

YourMother the Edgelord: No time to argue! Get in the driver's seat!

 

*Inside the museum, Team Sokovia sneaks towards the painting on their tip-toes.*

Rorschach: Here’s the deal. We have to get this painting somehow, someway. But how?

Wrath: We punch the glass.

PanaMovie: (cocks an eyebrow) I’d be surprised if you could do that. No offense, but that’s bulletproof glass.

Wrath: I can do it. I’m strong enough.

Rorschach: Well, if he’s punching the glass, then one of us has to go in and grab the painting.

Fancyarcher: I’ll do it.

*Everyone stares at Fancyarcher.*

Fancyarcher: I need to prove my worth to the team.

*Wrath smiles.*

PanaMovie: Well, I’m still stumped as to how Wrath’s gonna be able to punch the glass.

Spaghetti: Why don’t you wear these gauntlets?

Fancyarcher: Geez, Spaghetti! Where’d you get gauntlets?

Spaghetti: I’m quite resourceful, chap.

PanaMovie: I bet he knows where all the props are.

(Spaghetti winks.)

Wrath: Here goes nothing...

(Wrath shatters the bulletproof glass with one punch. Fancyarcher grabs the painting and follows Wrath and Spaghetti. When security guards come to the scene, Rorschach and PanaMovie stands in front of Fancyarcher.)

Rorschach: (cracks knuckles) Don’t worry, Fancyarcher. We’ll take it from here.

PanaMovie: (rolls neck) You make sure that painting gets out of here.

(Rorschach and PanaMovie fight the security guards as the others escape.)

 

*In a separate part of the museum, Team Wakanda convenes near their painting.*

captainwondyful: I have an idea.

ZeeSoh: Sure you do, Cap.

captainwondyful: How about this. Instead of acting like we’re stealing the painting… Let’s act like we’re taking the painting somewhere else.

DAJK: That’s a pretty good idea… We might get extra points for heisting the painting without causing too big of a scene.

(JJ-8 sighs ands stands up.)

JJ-8: In the words of Eminem… Now, this looks like a job for me…

(JJ-8 walks up to the painting, takes it off the wall, and begins to walk off. Two security guards see him taking the painting.)

Security Guard #1: Freeze!

Security Guard #2: What are you doing with Andy Warhol’s Can of Soup?!

(JJ-8 stares at the guards with a stone-faced expression.)

JJ-8: You fools. I AM THE SOUP.

ZeeSoh: (throws his hands in the air) Welp. Now it’s a scene. 

Claire of Themyscira: Not yet, it ain’t.

(Claire of Themyscira struts up to the guards.)

Security Guard #1: Freeze, you ugly thief!

Security Guard #2: Yeah, you better freeze, you ugly thief!

Claire of Themyscira: Ugly? I’m not ugly! I am beautiful! No matter what you say! Words can’t bring me down!

(captainwondyful stands next to Claire of Themyscira.)

captainwondyful: I am beautiful, in every single way! Words can’t bring me down!

(They stare into each other’s eyes before turning towards the guards.)

Cap & Claire [in unison]: So don’t you bring me down today!

(The guards start crying.)

Security Guard #1: My apologies! I assumed you were ugly just because you were thieves!

Security Guard #2: Surely, you have changed my perspective.

(Suddenly, DAJK, who’s been sneaking behind the guards, knocks both guards out with a swift scissor-kick to the head. The other teammates stare at him in disbelief.)

DAJK: Is that what you mean by being aggressively, ZeeSoh?

(ZeeSoh flashes a wolf-like smile.)

ZeeSoh: Yes! That is correct! Sometimes you’ll have to hurt people to go farther in the game. But don’t hesitate. Never be afraid to hurt people.

DAJK: ...Okay!

(captainwondyful and Claire of Themyscira turn to each other.)

Claire of Themyscira: That never happened.

captainwondyful: ...But it did happen.

Claire of Themyscira: Don’t play games. That. Never. Happened.

(Claire struts away while Cap smiles slyly behind her back.)

 

*Meanwhile, Team Asgard’s van is pursued by a large squadron of police officers.*

elcaballero: Huh. It’s like Grand Theft Auto in real life.

chasmmi: That’s never a good thing when you’re able to say that!

YourMother the Edgelord: This is so bad! We’re all gonna get swatted and all I have for solace is this chili pepper!

Keanu: Gimme the chili pepper.

(Keanu snatches the chili pepper and throws it at a cop car. The cop car swerves off the road and runs into a pole.)

Keanu: That’s one of them!

Sheikh: Unfortunately, that’s not nearly enough…

(The squad cars begin to close the gap.)

StarWarsMemer: I never wanted to participate in theft in the first place.

elcaballero: You do know that it’s just a game, right? You’re not actually stealing a real painting.

Thanos Legion: (sarcastically) Listen to me, “MeowwoeM.” Don’t you want to be seen as a stronger competitor? Now’s your chance!

StarWarsMemer: No! I won’t participate in theft! I want no part of this!

(StarWarsMemer jumps out of the van, leaving the van driverless.)

YourMother the Edgelord: Gingersnaps, we’re gonna crash!!

(YourMother attempts to jump out of the van, but chasmmi grabs him by the shirt.)

chasmmi: One of us ditching is enough. Stay in the van.

(The van crashes into a pole. The policemen bum-rush the van and put all the Team Asgard players in handcuffs.)

 

*The players put in their predictions and stand in front of SLAM!.*

SLAM!: Welp. Let’s see how everyone did!

 

TEAM ASGARD

Spoiler

Thanos Legion - 74.51%

Keanu - 73.09%

Sheikh - 68.93%

elcaballero - 67.10%

chasmmi - 64.58%

YourMother the Edgelord - 49.95%

StarWarsMemer - 24.98% (placeholder)

Total Average - 60.45%

 

TEAM SOKOVIA

Spoiler

Wrath - 71.68%

PanaMovie - 69.74%

Rorschach - 69.14%

Fancyarcher - 65.46%

Spaghetti - 65.28%

Total Average - 68.26%

 

TEAM WAKANDA

Spoiler

Claire of Themyscira - 76.03%

captainwondyful - 75.76%

DAJK - 75.14%

JJ-8 - 68.50%

ZeeSoh - 68.29%

Total Average - 72.74%

 

SLAM!: Looks like Team Wakanda is the winner of the challenge!

Claire of Themyscira: MmmmHmmm!

PanaMovie: (cocks an eyebrow) Reciting Christina Aguilera lyrics was worth more points than shattering the bulletproof glass? That's some abstract reasoning right there...

SLAM!: And, unfortunately, Team Asgard is going to Tribal Council for the first time this season! Thanos Legion is immune; everyone else is eligible for elimination!

(chasmmi buries his face in his hands. YourMother gulps. elcaballero and StarWarsMemer exchange glances. Sheikh and Keanu hold each other close. Thanos Legion crosses his arms and flashes his teeth.)

 

(SLAM!: And I must inform @StarWarsMemer: If you do not predict for a second week in a row, you will be eliminated from the game.)

 

CONFESSIONAL - StarWarsMemer: I don't care if I go home for what I did. At least I go home with my conscious clear.

CONFESSIONAL - YourMother the Edgelord: This is really bad... I screwed up royally today... I can't go home before reconvening with my showmance, DAJK... That'd be heartbreaking...

CONFESSIONAL - Thanos Legion: It's fun to watch the weak assume their rightful place in the lower rungs of society. Remember this, viewers: survival of the fittest. That is the key to life.

CONFESSIONAL - Fancyarcher: It seems like I impressed my teammates today... I'm happy about that... Yeah... I'm happy about that...

CONFESSIONAL - ZeeSoh: Did you see what DAJK did?! Ha HA! He's becoming my little Frankenstein monster! He'll be a super-villain like me, just you wait!

 

SLAM!: Before I post the drop-down box with all the information in it... I did say that the top four scorers would receive a Special Secret Reward. Those top four scorers are Claire of Themyscira, captainwondyfulDAJK, and Thanos Legion. Please stand by for Private Messages that explain more about what the Special Secret Reward entails.

 

SLAM!: And without further ado, here is the Tuck Shop information, Tribal Council information, and Weekly Challenge information!

Spoiler

TUCK SHOP

The highest scoring member of each team gets two coins.

Every member of the winning team gets three coins.

In the case that a player who did not send in predictions is on the winning team, that player will not receive tuck shop coins.

 

Current Balance

10: Claire of Themyscira, ZeeSoh

9: Spaghetti, Thanos Legion

8: chasmmi, DAJK, YourMother the Edgelord

7: Fancyarcher, Rorschach

6: Keanu, Sheikh, StarWarsMemer

5: DAJK, elcaballero, JJ-8, Wrath

3: captainwondyful, PanaMovie

 

CANDY APPLE - 3 Coins (Gives the average of your predictions a boost of 2%.)

RECYCLE PAD - 5 Coins (Doubles your vote in the Tribal Council.)

ROTTEN APPLE - 5 Coins (Reduces 2% from the score of another player--yes, this can be used for either second immunity or weekend challenges)

COPY MACHINE - 8 Coins (Allows you to take the score of ANY player in the game for a weekend challenge.)

 

PM me if you want an item by Thursday, September 19th at 11:59PM PST! Also, remember that you do not need to use it this week! Simply indicate in any challenge when you will be using it!

 

TRIBAL COUNCIL - FOR TEAM ASGARD ONLY

Sorry Team Asgard, but you will be sent to Tribal Council. All team members must send me a PM with who they wish to vote off the island. However, there is hope. The second immunity challenge is also listed below. Winning the challenge will make you immune from elimination for this week.

 

SECOND IMMUNITY: PREDICT THE FOLLOWING TUESDAY GROSSES (NOT PTAS) OF...

The Goldfinch

Hustlers

It: Chapter 2

Fast and Furious: Hobbs & Shaw

Ready or Not

 

Votes are due by Wednesday at 5PM EST.

Second Immunity Predictions are due by Tuesday, September 17th at 11:59 PM PST.

(I recommend giving your vote alongside your second immunity predictions.)

 

Good luck to all of the Team Asgard players!

 

WEEKEND CHALLENGE #6

PREDICT THE FOLLOWING 3-DAY WEEKEND GROSSES:

Ad Astra

Downton Abbey

Rambo: Last Blood

The Goldfinch

Hustlers

It: Chapter 2

The Lion King

Official Secrets

 

Predictions are due by Thursday, September 19th at 11:59 PM PST.

 

(There will not be a Flash Fight this week.)

 

Edited by SLAM!
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@SLAM! pretty sure we passed weekend #4 sometime ago......

:Venom:

 

awesome work team!

:hi5:

 

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Also, I’m barred from participating in the Tuesday Immunity Challenge, correct? If I, in theory, wanted to give up my regular immunity to participate, would that be allowed? (I can't think of much reals to do that, I’m just a thorough person).

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6 minutes ago, Thanos Legion said:

Also, I’m barred from participating in the Tuesday Immunity Challenge, correct? If I, in theory, wanted to give up my regular immunity to participate, would that be allowed? (I can't think of much reals to do that, I’m just a thorough person).


I'm going to go ahead and say that no one is allowed to give up their immunity in order to participate in the Second Immunity challenge, for the reason that the challenge is for a second person to gain immunity. Giving the highest scoring teammate the potential to hog all the immunity would defeat the purpose.

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50 minutes ago, Thanos Legion said:

Also, I’m barred from participating in the Tuesday Immunity Challenge, correct? If I, in theory, wanted to give up my regular immunity to participate, would that be allowed? (I can't think of much reals to do that, I’m just a thorough person).

Sounds like someone is trying to steal all the immunities from his team.. :sparta:

 

Nasty!

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Just now, JJ-8 said:

Sounds like someone is trying to steal all the immunities from his team.. :sparta:

 

Nasty!

For shame JJ, such uncharitable assumptions . I simply enjoy the thrill of battle... err, that is to say, predictions. I’ll be making private predictions for the immunity challenge anyway to test my skills, but with nothing on the line it won’t bring the same rush.

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@chasmmi @elcaballero @Keanu @Sheikh @StarWarsMemer @Thanos Legion @YourMother the Edgelord

 

Obligatory reminder that the Second Immunity Challenge predictions are due tonight at 11:59 PM PST! Tagging everyone so as not to reveal who's sent 'em so far!

 

@captainwondyful @Claire of Themyscira @DAJK @Thanos Legion

 

Please remember that your responses to the Special Secret Reward are due roughly around 5 PM EST on Wednesday!

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TRIBAL COUNCIL #4

 

@chasmmi @elcaballero @Keanu @Sheikh @StarWarsMemer @Thanos Legion @YourMother the Edgelord

 

SLAM!: Welcome, Team Asgard, to your first Tribal Council of the Season! Here, you will be voting off one of your teammates!

Keanu: Oh no...  I really don't want to vote anyone out...

chasmmi: Me neither. But alas. It must be done.

 

*Voting commences.*

Keanu: I'm really sorry... I feel like I barely got to know you... (votes)

Sheikh: I'm sure of it. This is a most logical decision. (votes)

Thanos Legion: The strong will always surpass the weak. (votes)

chasmmi: I'm doing this because it's too early to get blood on my hands. (votes)

elcaballero: This isn't much, I know... But it's something. (votes)

 

 

 

SLAM!: Huh? I'm missing two votes.

YourMother the Edgelord: I'm sorry! I forgot to vote.

(StarWarsMemer hesitates, then looks up at SLAM!.)

StarWarsMemer: I know it's happening to me. I'm letting it happen.

(Silence.)

SLAM!: ...Well. Let's see if tonight's council plays out how you think it will. Firstly, let's reveal who won the Second Immunity Challenge.

Spoiler

CHASMMI wins the challenge with a score of 94.22%!

 

chasmmi: Thanks for the warm-up, I guess.

 

 

SLAM!: Let's reveal the votes. First vote:

Spoiler

StarWarsMemer

 

SLAM!: Second vote:

Spoiler

YourMother the Edgelord

 

SLAM!: Third vote:

Spoiler

StarWarsMemer

 

SLAM!: Fourth vote:

Spoiler

StarWarsMemer

 

SLAM!: Fourth player voted off of Survivor Season Six...

Spoiler
Spoiler

StarWarsMemer

 

SLAM!: That's four, that's enough, you need to bring your torch.

(StarWarsMemer grabs his torch and starts walking away. elcaballero stands up.)

elcaballero: Wait! Why didn't you vote?

StarWarsMemer: This game is much... grimier than I expected. It's not for me.

elcaballero: But-

StarWarsMemer: Win. Alright? I'll remember you.

(StarWarsMemer walks to SLAM!.)

SLAM!: StarWarsMemer? The tribe has spoken.

(SLAM! snuffs out StarWarsMemer's torch.)

StarWarsMemer: Bye, everyone! I had fun!

(StarWarsMemer walks off. elcaballero clinches the bridge of his nose.)

 

CONFESSIONAL - StarWarsMemer: Listen. I'm not saying that the people who want to lie, cheat, and steal their way to victory are wrong by any means. I'm just saying that it's not for me. So I don't think this game is for me. It's unfortunate, I know, but I'd rather stay true to myself than become something I'm not. I wish the best of luck to all of my teammates on Team Asgard... But I especially wish the best of luck to elcaballero!

 

SLAM!: Stay tuned for a special announcement.

 

 

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SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT

 

@captainwondyful @chasmmi @Claire of Themyscira @DAJK @elcaballero @Fancyarcher @JJ-8 @Keanu @PanaMovie @Rorschach @Sheikh @Spaghetti @Thanos Legion @Wrath @YourMother the Edgelord @ZeeSoh

 

Congratulations to all of you for making it this far in the game! Truly, one chapter of the game has come to a close...

 

And a new chapter is just beginning.

 

Spoiler

NEW TEAMS

 

For the first time in Box Office Survivor history, the players are being split into four teams of four.

 

The Special Secret Reward for captainwondyful, Claire of Themyscira, DAJK, and Thanos Legion was that they got to act as Team Captains and pick players to be their teammates. They also got the choose the team names!

 

The Howling Amazons

Spoiler

captainwondyful

PanaMovie

Sheikh

ZeeSoh

 

The Birds of Prey

Spoiler

Claire of Themyscira

elcaballero

Spaghetti

Wrath

 

(By request, when/if this team loses a player, the team name will be changed to Gotham City Sirens.)

 

The Rockin' Robots

Spoiler

DAJK

JJ-8

Rorschach

YourMother the Edgelord

 

The Black Order

Spoiler

Thanos Legion

chasmmi

Fancyarcher

Keanu

 

 

Not only this, but captainwondyful, Claire of Themyscira, DAJK, and Thanos Legion are being given conditional immunity in the next Weekend Challenge. In the event their team is in last place, the Team Captain will receive immunity from elimination even if they didn't get the highest score. Don't worry--the one who did get highest immunity will also receive immunity, just like normal. The Team Captain MUST fully participate in the Weekend Challenge to activate this Team Captain perk. This is the only Weekend Challenge where this perk will apply.

 

This is an exciting new twist to the Survivor game! How will the players react to the new teams? How will Ad AstraDownton Abbey, and Rambo: Last Blood factor into the Challenge? Find out on the next episode of Survivor Season Six!

 

ZeeSoh: Go get 'em, DAJK.

(DAJK and YourMother run toward each other and give each other a big hug. ZeeSoh smirks.)

 

Keanu: It's okay, Sheikh. We'll be together in the merge. I'm not worried about us.

Sheikh: Yeah... See you then...

(They part ways.)

 

PanaMovie: Forever allies?

Rorschach: Forever allies.

(They fist-bump each other and part ways.)

 

Fancyarcher: I'm really scared, Wrath... I could be seen as a weak link...

Wrath: Look at me. You are not a weak link. You're nowhere near weak. You're strong. Okay? You got this.

Fancyarcher: Yeah... Thank you, Wrath.

(They part ways.)

 

Claire of Themyscira: Looks like this game wants us to be enemies.

captainwondyful: Honest to God? I'm happy that's the case.

(They glare at each other before parting ways.)

 

Spaghetti: Geez, SLAM!... You've really gone and done it this time...

 

*As the players form their new teams, Thanos Legion crosses his arms, puffs out his chest, and smiles as he looks down on everyone else.*

 

TO BE CONTINUED

 

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Well, that happened. Finally got the perfect team name 😈

 

SLAM!, I was curious whether you were looking for the Sunday cume for Downton Abbey (including the 2.2M sneaks from last week) or just the money made this weekend without that 2.2M. 

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1 hour ago, Thanos Legion said:

Well, that happened. Finally got the perfect team name 😈

 

SLAM!, I was curious whether you were looking for the Sunday cume for Downton Abbey (including the 2.2M sneaks from last week) or just the money made this weekend without that 2.2M. 

 

I don't want the sneaks included.

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28.8 for DA, 0.76 Goldfinch, 0.249 for OS :gold:

 

Wonder if any players were on the wrong side of any of those 

Edited by Thanos Legion
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