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SUR(VI)VOR Ep. 13: THE [CURRENT] WAR ON [LAST] CHRISTMAS

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P0007310.jpg

 

The Fred Astaires, in their Top Hats, scroll down to boat launch where Captain Wondyful and @SLAM! wait.  From the other direction enter The Gene Kellys, in their Sou'westers.

 

SLAM!:  First things first; Sheikh, we'll take back that Immunity Idol from you.

 

Sheikh hands it over.

 

@Sheikh: Only temporarily.  It'll come right back. 

@Thanos Legion: I doubt that.

 

CAP: Haven't even heard the Challenge still predicting the win?

THANOS: Last week was a fluke.

 

CONFESSIONAL:

  • THANOS: After list week's fiasco, I am not longer allowing my Children to make decisions.
  • @ZeeSoh: Thanos didn't see the humor of last week's Challenge results, and has decided to [ZeeSoh does air quotes] "Take Over" the leadership role.
  • THANOS: They've all agreed my rule will be law.
  • @DAJK: Okay, Boomer.
  • THANOS: Everything this week will go according to plan.
  • DAJK: [to off-screen producer] Technically, he's an Eternal Purple Space Being but he just feels like a Boomer, right?

 

SLAM!: The Fred Astaires, what do you have to say to Thanos? You've beaten them two weeks in a row!

 

Thanos Legion opens his mouth to correct SLAM! about how one time was only by .01% and the next due to someone not finishing.  SLAM! puts his hand up.  It's the Fred Astaires time now!

 

@JJ-8: I have to say I'm thrilled to be playing with Chas.  [He tosses his arm around Chas].

@chasmmi: Yeah. Yeah.  Same.

 

@Claire of Themyscira: I feel confident I can take them all down!

SLAM!: I?  As in just you?

CLAIRE: If that's what it comes to.

 

@PanaMovie: It won't!  Sheikh's back.  

 

Sheikh looks over to Keanu and then away.

 

SHEIKH: Last week was a wake up call.  I'm ready to see this through to the end.

 

CAP: What about you, Keanu?  You're being quiet.

@Keanu: Focused.  Let's just get on with it.

 

Cap nods.  Let's just get on with it:

 

CAP: For this week's challenge we're going all the way back to the first Immunity Challenge on Survivor.  In your teams, you will grab two row boats and launch them from Hernshead.  You have to work together to string the Christmas Lights across the lake.  First team to get all of their lights strung, and turn them on, wins Immunity.

 

DAJK: Should we be doing this over open water?

SLAM!: John Cena and the FDNY vetoed the OG idea of using open flames, so, unfortunately, yes.

 

CAP: They'll be three pit-stops where you can load up on more Christmas lights.

 

survivorcurrentwarrace.jpg

 

SLAM!: First team to Loeb's Boathouse gets lunch with a very special guest --

CHAS: I don't think Marty's special if he's shown up three times already --

PANAMOVIE: He wasn't out drinking with us --

CHAS: He was.  You just drank so much you forgot --

SLAM!: AHEM! - With a very special guest and wins Immunity.  Losing team goes to Tribal Council, where another person will be voted out of the game.

 

CAP: Get Ready!

SLAM!: Get Set!

SLAM! & CAP: Survivors, GO!

 

central-park-autumn-and-buildings-reflec

 

Both teams rush to Hernsheads rocks where they find their row boats, and:

 

CONFESSIONAL:

  • CHAS: I thought I was evil running the Summer and Winter Games, but, My Gawd.  That's diabolical.
  • KEANU: Why?  Why would anyone do that?
  • DAJK: It has to be at least five feet tall.

 

They all look upon:

 

Spoiler

tangled-christmas-lights.jpg

 

 

The Gene Kellys stare at their mound for a moment.  ZeeSoh fishes into his pocket and pulls out a candy apple. He tosses it on the mound.  The pile magically unwinds and sorts itself into organized circles.

 

CONFESSIONAL:

  • ZEESOH: Yeah. No way.  Easiest three coins I've spent all game.

 

The Gene Kellys grab their piles, run toward their boats -- Thanos & Keanu in one, DAJK & ZeeSoh in the other -- and began rowing across the lake.

 

JJ-8, upon seeing this, pulls out his own candy apple.  The Fred Astaires hustle to get to their boats and get across the lake.  JJ-8 & PanaMovie in one boat, Claire, Chas, and & Sheikh in another.

 

Both teams work to string up the lights on the checkpoints.  

 

christmas-tree-central-park-boathouse-26

 

The Gene Kellys reach The Lake Viewing Area first.  They stop a huge box with a small red button.  Thanos runs out and presses it. His team's first leg of lights light up.  The box opens and out falls more tangled Christmas Lights.  This time it's Keanu who pulls out a candy apple and tosses it on the mound of lights.

 

The Fred Astaires arrive to watch the Gene Kellys pulling back out onto the lake in their rowboats.

 

Claire presses the run button, and PanaMovie tosses a candy apple on the mound.  They gather their neat supplies and run back to the lake.

 

The Gene Kellys seem to fall into a rhythm.  ZeeSoh rows the boat as Thanos, who stands, make sure the lights stay out of the water.  DAJK rows his boat, and Keanu feeds Thanos the lights.  They even manage to round the corner to the Bow Bridge with ease.

 

The same can't be said for The Fred Astaires!

 

JJ8 and PanaMovie can't seem to row their boat!  They're just going around in a circle!

 

shutterstock_337731353.0.jpg

 

CLAIRE: [screaming back at them] Use Another Apple!

JJ8: We don't have any more!

PANAMOVIE: Go on without us!

CLAIRE: I only SAY I can carry this team alone.  We ALL have to finish!

SHEIKH: THINK ROW-ROW-ROW-YOUR BOAT, guys!

JJ8: What?

CHAS: Paddle two times on the left, and once on the right to change directions!

CLAIRE: ROW, ROW, on the left, ROW YOU BOAT, on the right!

 

JJ8 & PANAMOVIE: Row, Row, Row Your Boat, Row, Row, Row Your Boat, Row, Row, Row Your Boat!

 

JJ8 and PanaMovie end up straighten themselves out of the circle -- only to end up going back to the starting point.

 

Chas runs to turn around to go get them.

 

Claire turns back to look for The Gene Kellys.

 

CLAIRE: DAMN IT, they're almost at the Bridge!  

    

image.jpg

 

The Gene Kellys row to the Bridge.  DAJK climbs a ladder to the top of the bridge.  He hits the red button.  The second leg of lights light up, and more tangled Christmas Lights fall out.  He takes out his Candy Apple and tosses it on the pile.  It self organizes, and he quickly works to give all the lights to their teammates.  Once first, he climbs back down the ladder.  They all take off for the third checkpoint.

 

Meanwhile, Chas, Claire, and Sheikh have FINALLY gotten to JJ8 and PanaMovie.  Sheikh tells PanaMovie to swap boats.  Now.  The Fred Astaires row off in the correct direction.  The only chatter is Claire asking for "Another Strain".    

 

 

The Gene Kellys keep up their assembly line, making quick work.  In no time they're at the Bethesda Foundation.  ZeeSoh, Keanu, and DAJK wait for Thanos to push the red button and retrieve the lights.  He does so, lighting up the third leg on the course.  Thanos takes out a candy apple and tosses it on the pile of lights. 

 

Nothing Happens.

 

Thanos picks up his apple and sniffs it.  It doesn't smell right.  It smells... rotten.

 

Cap comes around the Foundation into view.

 

CAP:  Oh, dear; Thanos, it appears someone has switched out your candy apple for a rotten apple.  They'll be no Bonus for you.  The Gene Kellys are going to have to untangle those by hand.

 

bethesda-fountain-autumn-close-up-daniel

 

The Fred Astaires have FINALLY reached the Bridge and light up their second leg of the course.  They hear a crash.

 

PANAMOVIE: Was that Thanos?

 

They peer over to the Foundation to see Thanos enraged.

 

JJ8:  Maybe he'll live up to their team's namesake and break his ankle cause he's so mad.

CHAS: What?
JJ8: Gene Kelly broke his ankle during a backyard volleyball game because he was so mad he lost.

CHAS: Why do you know that?

JJ8: Cap was InfoDumping About How He's the Greatest Hollywood Actor Of All Time while wasted last week.

CHAS: Greater than Chris Evans?

JJ8: Yeah?

CHAS: She was wasted.  

 

CLAIRE: BOYS!!

 

JJ8 and Chas turn back to see her covered in Christmas Lights.  Right!  Focus!  They get back to untangling them!

 

Back at the Foundation, DAJK, Keanu, and ZeeSoh have hopped out to untangle the Christmas lights as Thanos paces.

 

THANOS: Who did this?

KEANU: Great lunch topic! Untangle lights now!

THANOS: They will rue the day!

ZEESOH: Rue later!  We have a huge lead.  I don't want to lose it!  Do your part!

THANOS: We would have no need to worry if someone had not attempted to sabotage me.

DAJK: They did.  There are no attempts.  Just as you are not attempting to do your part now!

 

Thanos narrows his eyes at DAJK.  He leans down to pick up a few untangled bunches and lugs them off to the boats.

 

 

By the time The Gene Kellys have untangled all of their lights, and gotten into their boats, The Fred Astaires finally got Claire untangled from the lights.

 

CLAIRE: No, no, no.

PANAMOVIE: Crap! Let's just toss everything in the boats and try to untangle it as we go!

JJ8: That's a terrible idea!

SHEIKH: It's all we have!  We can't give up now!

 

They all get into their boats and try to make it to the Foundation.

 

But it's no use.  The Gene Kellys easily reach all of their checkpoints with the lights.

 

ny_central_park_boathouse_autumn_2006_01


 

The four tribal members reach the rock formation.  They climb up with their last strain of lights.  All of four of them hit the GIANT red button -- and light up their last leg of Christmas Lights.

 

Cap, SLAM, and Kevin Feige watch from the Boat House patio.

 

CAP: [In a booming voice] The Gene Kellys Win IMMUNITY!  The Fred Astaires, you're done.  Row on in!

 

The Gene Kellys make their way over from the rocks to the patio for lunch.  Kevin Feige gives Thanos the Immunity Popcorn.  

 

FEIGE: I'm excited about lunch with you all! 

THANOS: As am I.

 

But how can he be, when he has other things on his mind?


THE RESULTS

Spoiler

 

summer+stock+gif+06.gif
THE GENE KELLYS
MEMBER SCORE BONUS TOTAL
Keanu 79.11% 2.00% 81.11%
ZeeSoh 77.50% 2.00% 79.50%
DAJK 75.80% 2.00% 77.80%
Thanos Legion 77.69% 0.00% 77.69%
AVERAGE: 77.53%   79.03%

 

giphy.gif
THE FRED ASTAIRES
MEMBER SCORE BONUS TOTAL
Claire 77.52% 0.00% 77.52%
Chas 74.71% 0.00% 74.71%
Sheikh 72.52% 0.00% 72.52%
PanaMovie 67.64% 2.00% 69.64%
JJ-8 66.31% 2.00% 68.31%
AVERAGE: 71.74%   72.54%

 

 

 

 

AFTERMATH:

SLAM! and Cap gather all the Survivor around after The Gene Kellys Luncheon.

 

CAP:  A cautionary tale. Next week's going to be another big, game-changing week.  We'll reveal the full details with the results, but two things.  One, it might be time to stop thinking about this as a team game and time to start thinking about making some big, individual moves.

 

SLAM!: Two, The Copy Machine is NOT ALLOWED to be used for next week's Weekend Challenge.  You can use it during the Tribal Immunity Challenge, but NOT doing the Weekend Challenge.  

 

CAP: The Fred Astaires, you will face Tribal Council.  You can vote for anyone but Claire, who receives Immunity.  Details for your Immunity Challenge and the Weekend Challenge will be in the following post.

 

SLAM & CAP: Good Luck!

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Hmm, coins are starting to fly. Average 2.5 spent this weekend per player, resulting in a net .7% item difference between the teams. All that, for balance to be restored.

 

Awfully bold to use a rotten on me in a weekend challenge, but enjoy your wasted 5 coins   

 

infinity war avengers GIF

Edited by Thanos Legion
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TRIBAL COUNCIL

 

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The Fred Astaires enter the Tribal Council area at the Old Pier 54, the intended final destination for the Titanic. They place their torches in sand buckets covered with James Cameron movie posters.  Then take their seats in five old movie theater seats.

 

@SLAM! and Cap wait.  They take a seat in their director's cuts across from the campfire fueled by old celluloid film.

 

CAP: So.  [Cap holds the pause for a beat too long] What happened?  What went wrong?

@chasmmi: The Gene Kellys blew their whole bushel of Candy Apples --

CAP: No.  They won by a whole 5.79% without the Apples.  Frankly, they whipped your ass.

CHAS:  They all we did was make them waste their tuck shop coins.  

CAP: At the expense of losing a tribe member.

CHAS: Are we losing a Tribe Member?

 

Cap is ShockedMeme.Gif.  She turns to SLAM!, who's looking at JJ-8.

 

SLAM!: What do you have to say to that?
@JJ-8: I'm a bit surprised.  Chas and I go way back -- but he would murder his mother if it meant winning.  

CHAS: I would never hurt my mother.  Father, maybe.  But not my mother.

 

SLAM: JJ8 and PanaMovie, do you think either of you should go home?

@PanaMovie: I think I am a valued member of this Tribe.  There are challenges we won because of me.  But.  I believe in merit.  I did not submit predictions to the Immunity Challenge, and I will not vote.  If you want me gone, I will be gone.

 

Everyone starts at him.

 

CAP: That's a lot of trust to put in these people.

PANAMOVIE: It is the just thing to do.

CAP: So who should go home?

 

JJ8: Not me.

@Claire of Themyscira: You performed the worst this week.  Why wouldn't you send you home?

JJ8: Cap said to start thinking about yourself and not the team.  Maybe I'm useful to have around.

 

@Sheikh: There is a long history in Survivor of the Strongest Member surrounding themselves with the weakest.  But that normally comes when we get down to the Final Three or Four.

 

SLAM!: We won't get to the Final with someone Results.  So let's get onto it. 

 

CAP: First up, let's look at Chas' Scores.  Before we do that.  Does anyone have any Tuck Shop Items they wish to play?

 

Everyone remains silent.  Cap nods.  She reveals Chas' Results:

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Spoiler

MEMBER RAW APPLES DISNEY+ SCORE
CHAS 74.35% 0%   74.35%
JJ-8        
SHEIKH        

 

CAP: Now, we'll reveal JJ-8's Results.  Before we do that.  Does anyone have any Tuck Shop Items they wish to play?

 

OFF-SCREEN VOICE: We Do! 

 

Everyone turns to see Kevin Feige and Martin Scorsese enter the Pier.

 

CAP: Gentlemen, this is highly irregular.

FEIGE: We're only the messengers.  I have a gift for JJ8.

 

He opens a box and pulls out a copy machine. 

 

FEIGE: It comes with the instructions from an Anonymous Player to use it for JJ8 on Chas. 

CAP:  That is a copy machine.  As per @Spaghetti's instructions in past Survivors, it will copy Chas' Base Score.

 

SCORSESE: I also have a gift for JJ8.

 

He opens a box and pulls out a Candy Apple.

 

CAP: This is a blessed day.  If that's all, good sirs, this is supposed to be a private meeting.  

 

Feige and Scorsese give JJ-8 a thumbs up as they leave almost as soon as they came.

 

CAP:  There will be no need to reveal JJ8's scores.  He's +2% over Chas.  Unless --

 

Chas raises.  

 

CHAS: I wish to use a Rotten Apple against JJ-8.

 

Sheikh raises.

 

SHEIKH: I wish to use a Rotten Apple against JJ-8.

 

Claire raises.  

 

SCORSESE: Wait, we're back!  I forgot!

 

Scorsese comes running in with another Rotten Apple.  

 

SCORSESE: A gift from an admirer.  To use against JJ-8.

 

Scorsese runs back out.  Everyone looks back and forth.  What's going on?

 

CAP: So three Rotten Apples and a Candy Apple nets a -4% against.  Does anyone else wish to use a Tuck Shop Item?

 

PanaMovie remains quiet.


CAP: So the Final Total now sits at:

 

 

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
 
Spoiler

MEMBER RAW APPLES DISNEY+ SCORE
CHAS 74.35% 0%   74.35%
JJ-8 74.35% -4.00%   70.35%
SHEIKH        

 

SLAM!: Now, let us resolve the Disney+ Challenge.  The Actuals came in as:  

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
1
 
 
 
1
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
1
Spoiler
Maleficent $732,518
JoJo Rabbit $427,081
The Lion King $5,560
Toy Story 4 $3,223

 

SLAM!: Only JJ8 predicted all four options.  JJ8, do you think that was wise?

JJ8: Like Cap said: No Risk, No Reward.  If I'm going out, I'm going out swinging.

SLAM!: And now the Results:     

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
 
Spoiler

MEMBER MOVIE ACC BONUS
SHEIKH Mal 94.08% 0.50%
CHAS Mal 91.56% 0.50%
JJ8 Mal 94.07% 0.50%
JJ8 JoJo 78.77% -1%
JJ8 TS4 76.96 -1%
JJ8 TLK 62.44% -1.50%

 

 

SLAM!: So The Final Total stands at:

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
 
Spoiler

MEMBER RAW APPLES DISNEY+ SCORE
CHAS 74.35% 0% 0.50% 74.85%
JJ-8 74.35% -4.00% -3.00% 67.54%
SHEIKH     0.50%  

 

SLAM!: That means it all comes down to this.  Time to read Sheikh's Results.  Before we do, does anyone have any Tuck Shop Items they wish to play?

 

Everyone remains silent.

 

SLAM:  The results are:

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
 
Spoiler

MEMBER RAW APPLES DISNEY+ SCORE
CHAS 74.35% 0% 0.50% 74.85%
JJ-8 74.35% -4.00% -3.00% 67.54%
SHEIKH 88.67% 0% 0.50% 89.17%

 

SLAM!: SHEIKH WINS IMMUNITY!

 

The Fred Astaires:

 

giphy.gif

 

 

SLAM!: On that note, it's time to vote.

 

 

The tribe members go to the voting and confessional booth.

 

Cap comes back with the voting vase.

 

CAP: Now, before I reveal the votes, does anyone have any tuck shop items they wish to use?

 

JJ8 stands.

 

JJ8: I wish to use a recycle pad

CAP: Against who?

 

JJ8 turns back to his Tribe.

 

JJ8: Chas.

 

CAP: The vote stands at One Vote: Chas.  Now, I'll read the rest of the votes.  The decision is final.  The person will be asked to leave the tribal council area immediately. 

 

She opens the cover of the vase and pulls out the first vote:

 

Spoiler

 

CAP: First Vote,

 

She reveals JJ8.

 

CAP: One Vote: Chas; One Vote: JJ8

 

 

Spoiler

Cap opens up the next vote.

 

CAP: CHAS.  Two Votes: Chas; one vote JJ8.  Two votes left.

 

 

Spoiler

Cap opens up the next vote.

 

CAP: JJ8.  Two votes Chas; Two votes: JJ8.  One. Vote. Left.

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
 
Spoiler

 

Cap opens up the final vote.  Cap looks at it, sad.  She flips it to reveal:

 

CHAS.

 

CAP: That's Three Votes, Chase; Two Votes: JJ8.  

 

Chase GLARES at PanaMovie, who looks forward expressionless.  Sheikh and Claire and JJ8 look around wondering who flipped.

 

CAP: Chas, you need to bring me your torch.

 

Chas slowly raises from his seat.

 

CHAS: [to JJ8] You'll pay for this.

 

He brings his torch to Cap.

 

CAP: The tribe has spoken.

 

She extinguished his torch.

 

Chas walks out of the Tribal Area.

 

 

 

 

CAP: Another Tribal Council.  Another wild night.  I see some of you took my advice about looking out what's best for you, and not the team.  I hope you keep that in mind with this Weekend's Challenge.  If you think this is nuts, you haven't seen anything yet.

 

SLAM & CAP: Good Luck!

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55 minutes ago, Thanos Legion said:

So 6 items used, at a total of 31 coin cost. I see 3 have the source named and 3 are anonymous, is there a general policy on that? 

You tell me if you want it to be Public or Anon.  That's it.  Or whatever is better for the Story.

 

The Current Tuck Shop Stands at:

 

Tuck Shop Current Balance
19 @Thanos Legion
17 @Keanu
17 @ZeeSoh
16 @Sheikh
12 @PanaMovie
6 @DAJK
5 @Claire of Themyscira
1 @JJ-8
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1 hour ago, Thanos Legion said:

So 6 items used, at a total of 31 coin cost. I see 3 have the source named and 3 are anonymous, is there a general policy on that? 

Becomes obvious once the updated coins are posted ;)

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25 minutes ago, captainwondyful said:

Maybe it's cause your Thanos and everyone wants to be Tony Stark?

It was a bit more “all that for a drop of blood” than “I. AM. Iron Man.”    
 

Still, it’s probably not a great idea to have a target on my head for simple reasons of identity. Perhaps I should look into witness protection :rock:

Edited by Thanos Legion
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@Claire of Themyscira @DAJK @JJ-8 @Keanu @PanaMovie @Sheikh @Thanos Legion @ZeeSoh

 

This is your weekly Thank You Five.  I need your predictions in about four hours.  And remember, my warning call: be more concerned with what you're doing than with what others are doing.

 

If you've already sent in your predictions, for The Gene Kellys I have:

 

 

and for The Fred Astaires I have:

 

 

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