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Blanked Out Reviews, Y8

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Here's the deal; once again only posting the first half of the year's reviews before the top 25. However, I'm gonna work backwards, since most of my films came on later in the year. More fun to work back, y'dig? June should be up within an hour or so.

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June

Mighty Fall – I beg you, please stop writing in things like “think The Rains of Castamere” or “this is PG-13”. The former is lazy and provides extra work for the reader, immediately them pushing them out of the world you built. The PG-13 references do the latter portion of that; reminding one immediately that they’re reading a movie and not allowing them to create a world in their head. These are pet peeves I have said before, and they aren’t going away anytime soon. Also, as someone who once cast Hailee Steinfeld as a character way too old for her, I have to call that out here. Anyway, as for the movie itself, it's a tad overstuffed with plot and makes the critical mistake of focusing too much on plot than on the characters. There are a few dynamics I really like; mainly Thiago and Jane’s relationship, but it’s weirdly ignored for this unfocused story that ultimately blames racism existing in a culture on one person and then also reveals the entire point of this movie was just to rescue an unrepentant genocide soldier. I don’t think it fully works, but perhaps a sequel/spin-off focusing on Thiago and Jane and that unique sibling relationship would be more my jam. 2/5

Dave-Day
– feels like a very bad Adult Swim show with very little humor and a bizarre Jake Gyllenhaal performance. An R-rated animation about WWII is interesting, but going for these lame cheap jokes isn’t. Supremely boring. 1.5/5

Bailey Buckets: A Hoops Story
– giving it a bonus score for being a filler that’s actually a filler thank God. It’s a whatever movie, but it’s hard to hate. 3/5

Everything I Never Told You
– let’s get the worst thing out of the way first; Chloe Zhao directing this is nonsensical. Nothing in this remotely resembles her style, and she feels as though she was chosen to just tackle the themes within it that involve the Asian American diaspora – but in that regard, I just kept thinking about how Destin Daniel Cretton would’ve made more sense in this regard. The tone reminded me of The Glass Castle, which is a film I enjoy more than most. And it’s a shame because if Cretton – or anyone more appropriate to the material – had directed it, this would’ve easily been my favorite movie this studio has ever put forward. The tone is great, there’s only one thing that irked me, and I just found it intriguing and engaging throughout the whole thing. I’m still going to give it a good grade, but the Zhao directing (and also some culturally unspecific casting) brings it down in a sense the storytelling doesn’t deserve. Still, I imagine this will be on my ballot for a lot of stuff, even if the directing choice won’t be. 4/5

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May

Randy Raccoon in Cartoonist Combat – I too have seen Duck Amuck, and I know better to not rip it off for a very mediocre short. 1/5

The Wild Thornberries
– I try to give longer efforts a little bit of curve, where even if I hated it, I see the effort involved and I appreciate that. However, this borderlines on being illegible for a vast majority of the runtime, where things happen for the sake of it being cool and characters randomly disappear and reappear with no real context. Also, the ending of this movie is hysterical; she gives up her powers to be a better mom – even though literally before this movie began, she was just chilling running a zoo? And now she can’t talk to her animal friend? This movie is either mind-numblingly dumb or shockingly impossible to read, and is the greatest argument against adaptation I’ve ever read in this game. 0.5/5

Dealer’s Choice
– hmmm. It’s alright but the idea of a Garfield/Waller-Bridge film directed by Cory Finley is very exciting but this is honestly completely by the numbers. Probably one of the biggest disappointments of the year. 2/5

Heartman
– a perfectly enjoyable summer blockbuster that feels utterly mismarketed. Nothing about this outside of the opening is scary; this is instead a silly 80s style kids blockbuster with some ghoulish moments and heavy moralizing. I can’t really hate it but I can’t help being a tad disappointed this didn’t live up to the opening. Also, Donald Glover feels very miscast. 3/5

Monster Bug Wars: The Spider Path
– so stupid. I actually went into this with an open mind but it’s just a massive waste of time and effort for everyone involved. 0.5/5

Monster Bug Wars: The Scorpion Path
– marginally better than the Spider one, if just because the audacity of the post-credits scene “spoiling” the side-quel is very funny to me. 1/5

Rhino Riders 2
– A considerable step-down from the first. It’s very cool to watch, but the lack of character or clever silly worldbuilding like the first really hurt this. Also, it’s missing an actual ending lol. 2/5

Walking with Dinosaurs: The Cinematic Experience
– a totally fine nature documentary that examines dinosaurs. I was a tad bored, but if you’re obsessed with dinos, can’t go wrong here. 2.5/5

Wet Willy
– undeniably one of the stupidest films I’ve ever read. Somewhat impressive in how little care was put into this, and yet how hyper-detailed it is. Can’t imagine this finding an audience. 1.5/5

Mass Effect: Revelation
– honestly, it would be hard for me to explain just why this didn’t fully work for me. Yes, it has way too much exposition, and yes, it’s overstuffed. But I just never found the new characters compelling and the larger scale mixed with less compelling antagonists ultimately just had me bored for most of the runtime. There’s some good action here or there, but really, it just feels like a disappointment. Hopefully the inevitable fourth focuses more on characters rather than this excess of plot. 2.5/5

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April

The Insect God – this felt simultaneously very generic and also like it was throwing so much nonsense at me in terms of lore and names that I was consistently lost throughout it. Also have no clue why this is PG-13 honestly. Not a fan, sorry. 1/5

No Mercy
– you can tell this is a video game adaptation. There’s no sense of character or character dynamics, just non-stop generic action that feels like pure white noise. There’s also no consistent rules for these zombies which makes watching the entire thing frustrating. Also, this isn’t a mark against the movie, but it seems very dumb to adapt a popular video game and then title the movie something else entirely; that will significantly affect my predicts. Anyway, this is blah. 2/5

Up in the Sky
– hmmm. I think this is skirts the line of being in poor taste; it reminds of Music more than once. That said, I do think the imagery is wonderful and the basic conceit of the film is a cool one. I just wish there was more of the real world stuff than a simple journey through time and space. It’s fine. 3/5

Doc Dreams
– this is a good idea for a joke filler, and I appreciate it existing. 3/5

The Idiots
– the only one of these to be a real documentary. Well researched and doesn’t overstay its welcome. It’s an enjoyable watch even if you’re not into the sport. 3/5


Snow Monkeys – and here’s the kind of documentary filler I hate. WHY DOES JOHN WILLIAMS DO THESE 1/5

Numbers Theory
– Now this is what I’m talking about. Liam Neeson as his finest, such a fun action thriller with memorable characters that both allows Neeson to do his thing but also has a great supporting cast (shout out to Johnson and Shue especially). This rules. 3.5/5

 

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March

Citizen Kale: A VeggieTales Movie – has one of the funniest endings I’ve read this year. No I won’t be elaborating. This is otherwise highly mediocre. 2/5

Kings of the 6 –
not gonna lie, reading this after The Idiots makes this feels like a doc that’s trying to beat it to the box office to make more money. The lack of detail is whatever, and it’s not a good movie. 1.5/5

Tyler Perry’s 2 Big Families
– generic sequel that’s hard to judge just off of how simplistic it is. Whatever. 1.5/5

Far Cry
– some well-designed action, but just so dull and unlikable. Baffling Verhoeven is attached to this; there’s nothing about it that seems subversive or even remotely interesting.  It just feels like watching a twitch stream of a video game with that type of storytelling within. The one bright spot is a delightfully hammy Diego Luna who lights up the screen whenever he invades it. If only he was in more of it. Ultimately, I can appreciate some craft here but it just bored me. 2.5/5

MEG
– how is this PG-13? 1/5

Recompense
– a retrograde action movie that genuinely feels like it should’ve come out fifteen years ago. Another one I was tremendously bored with and had no real reason to enjoy. 1/5

Fable
– Another video game movie that definitely didn’t work for me. Feels like a dull D&D campaign with very little intriguing characters or cool setpieces to make it worthwhile. Didn’t work for me at all. 1.5/5

Flightless Bird: The Downfall of the Boeing 737 Max
– incisive and harrowing, this honestly lived up to the hype for me. It’s incredibly well-researched and presented in a form that makes it easy to follow and allows the sheer scale of the tragedies to really impact the viewer. This is really just a well-done documentary and it definitely did its job. 4/5

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February
Holland Hannah – This is my jam. A cool actioner that feels atmospheric not only due to the detailed soundtrack but also because the hopeless tone. It does a little with a lot and it’s genuinely one of the most memorable films of the year. 4/5

Funny Business
– gets a little too preachy for me by the end, but for the most part, this is a thematically cohesive and very entertaining movie that features gorgeous animation and a clever plot. An enjoyable riff on the idea of cartoons being alive. 3.5/5

Pokémon: The Case of the Orange Outrage
– hmm. I’ll be honest and say I don’t know why I didn’t love this. My guess is that it weirdly feels lighter than the previous films that had younger protagonists. Although I guess the better way to put it is this more blatantly chases nostalgia and yet had a pretty uninteresting story. The only reason I was into it was simply to see how it aimed to sequelize the original anime. Nevertheless, it ultimately feels like solid fun but not much more. 3/5

Romance Road
– has a lot of good elements. Unfortunately also has bizarre RAV4 product placement and major supporting cast made up exclusively Karadashians. It also makes the crucial mistake of having this romance go by too quickly in movie time for it to matter to our characters; when Malcolm says he needs time away after only spending a few days together, that feels creepy more than anything. Still, I’m a sucker for romcoms. 3/5

A Very Adam & Cindy Valentine
– can’t remember what I thought of the first one, but this one really annoyed me for reasons unknown. Sorry. 1.5/5

Christie Monteiro
– Some of this review is from my pre-read since I only really noticed two scenes added from it that really didn’t change my thoughts. Hmmm... I like aspects of it, but I think the video game origins of it feel a little obvious at points - by this, I mean the tone set does not really allow for the sudden arrival of massive fantasy and sci-fi elements. Solid video game movie with cool action, but nothing more. 3/5

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January
Home Invasion: Part III – Hunted – Why is Joe Carnahan doing this? God, this sucks. Meh. 1/5

White Wyvern
– Huh. Yup. It lives up to the hype. It’s not even funny bad; it’s just genuinely annoying and horrifically misjudged all around. Everyone involved with this film should be embarrassed and if CAYOM worked the same way real life does, Julia Garner’s career would be dead after this. Just horrendous and dull. 0.5/5

Gunman Clive
– a live-action Duck Hunt reboot that’s inexplicably directed by Shane Black. This sucks lol 1/5

The Lost Empire
– I’m certain it will do well at the box office, but this has the exact same issues the original film does with feeling incredibly rushed. I know what you’re thinking: “but Blank, it has a much longer runtime”. Sure, but the story as written only really changes the setting and adds a political point to it. The story needs much heavier reworking than what this film gives it, and as such, it comes off as mediocre as the original movie. 1.5/5

Losers Weepers
– honestly, one of the most amusing films I’ve read so far. Genuinely cheeky and pretty fun throughout; I really liked this lol. 3.5/5

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Posted (edited)

So, uh... you know I said I was reading things in reverse?

 

Well, I finished December-July before I even started posting these reviews. I was just waiting to a day when I could announce that and post the top 25 tomorrow...

 

But first, tomorrow on my lunch break, I will post a review that is on the level of Expedecade and Kansas. A movie in the second half of the year that got me so frustrated I needed to write around 2,500 words on exactly why it didn't work for me. 

 

Then tomorrow evening, I will post my top 25, along with the rest of my predicts and the second half reviews.

 

See y'all tomorrow.

Edited by Blankments
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The following contains spoilers for both Endless Animation’s The Un-Title-Able Squirrel Girl Sequel and Pixar’s Soul.

 

So initially, when I was reading this, I had planned to not really write a review of this. Every year, I write some genuine constructive criticism for an Endless Animation film for the next year’s films to have no real discernable difference in quality. However, in inspiration of this film’s utterly baffling seven-year time jump, I have decided to take inspiration from a classic review from 2.0, Numbers’ review of Expedecade, and break down absolutely everything wrong with this movie. So call me CinemaSins I guess. These all come from notes I made while I was reading it, although I’ll admit I don’t have as many notes for the beginning of the film.

 

  1. Before the movie even begins, the cast listing includes Daniel Radcliffe as Captain Britain who never appears in this film. Furthermore, it inexplicably doesn’t include Maggie Smith’s character of Professor Cirque, which would be fine if it was a cameo but it’s a seriously important major supporting role that is inexplicably played by an actor of Maggie Smith’s caliber.
  2. Alright, now let’s get into the movie. We meet Nancy Whitehead before the time jump, who introduces herself a sidekick to her superhero best friend. Squirrel Girl somehow doesn’t once interact or meet with Alchemist until after the seven-year time jump, which means either that somehow, they’ve been operating in NYC as superheroes for seven years and haven’t seen each other, or Alchemist was operating under a different identity for the past seven years, who still hasn’t met Squirrel Girl. Either way, the meeting before the time jump is utterly nonsensical for what this movie presents Alchemist to be.
  3. Alright, so Alchemist. This is a point that will be repeated later on, but if you’re acknowledging something within your script as a clearly ill-thought-out idea through a quick joke, perhaps you shouldn’t do it? I’m referring to the throwaway line of “Squirrel Girl loudly retorts she’s only 32 and that Alchemist sounds older than her,” which clearly is meant to riff on Golshifteh Farahani being older than Anna Kendrick in real life. Which like… okay. Sure. It’s true. But if this is an issue then you should actually cast an age appropriate actress for the role of Alchemist, rather than draw attention to the fact that the casting is bad.
  4. Back to the time-jump not making sense: MoEnergy is developed from The Destroyer’s alien tech from the first movie interacting with Earth elements. Okay. Why did it take them seven years to reach this level of science? Like, sure, this isn’t inherently a problem, but it just feels like in a comic book world like this, this is honestly something that is frequently figured out much sooner to the arrival of the technology to Earth.
  5. Dana snarks “Work must mean sucking tongue.” I’m fairly certain you can’t say “sucking tongue” in a PG movie.
  6. Speaking of Dana, it’s utterly baffling how the first film clearly sets up their relationship as the emotional core of this franchise, but she’s a total afterthought here, outside of the book stuff which never actually affects the story. Somehow in the last seven years, she discovered she has superpowers but yet has chosen to do absolutely nothing with them – and this never ties into the main story “arc” (arc in air quotes because I ultimately remain unconvinced this film has any character arcs) of Squirrel Girl doubting that she wants to be a superhero. Her best friend has superpowers but isn’t a superhero, so why the hell does that never come up?
  7. Doctor Doom is introduced with multiple fat jokes. Gonna say it now and will say it again; this film pulls off a very unique feat of somehow having the worst cinematic depiction of Doctor Doom yet. The one in the Tim Story movies was kinda lame but fit that movie’s tone, and Toby Kebbell had some solid hammy moments. This one is such a drag, an idiot that feels like the muscle rather than the cream of the crop that the Marvel universe has to offer. Honestly, an absolute lowlight of this film.
  8. Speaking of a lowlight of this film, “Melissa motivates Doom with an impassioned speech as reminding him what he’s become, and how he used to be a genius tactician, brilliant doctor, cruel monarch, Sorcerer Supreme, and almost as evil as Ted Cruz.” Groan.
  9. I already mentioned Maggie Smith, but yeah. Deeply confused why she’s here.
  10. All the fights in this movie are such a slog to get through. There are creative moments here and there, but they’re all written so chunkily and with forced jokes that I can’t get into them at all. I’ll admit that I too have issues with writing detailed fights, but I aim to keep my sentences simple and focused on one character at a time. This film never does that, and it drives me insane.
  11. Remember my point in point #3? I’ll repeat it: if you’re acknowledging something within your script as a clearly ill-thought-out idea through a quick joke, perhaps you shouldn’t do it? This, of course, refers to Dr. Doom telling Squirrel Girl not to make a cheap fat joke and Squirrel Girl agreeing she won’t… after the movie has already made multiple cheap fat jokes at Dr. Doom’s expense.
  12. Why even is Doctor Doom in this? The only thing that feels remotely related to his actual character is his diplomatic immunity which is just vaguely mentioned anyway. He’s in this movie as a marketing tool only, honestly, not once allowing cool action or being vaguely reminiscent of his character in any comic.
  13. They go undercover and build a high-tech surveillance system for the bad guy. Granted, they put trackers and easy bypasses in it, but it just feels so stupid in both directions. It’s dumb they put that much work into it, and it’s even stupider that Melissa didn’t think to check for that stuff.
  14. Jumping ahead a ton, but Michelle Yeoh shows up as Robbie’s mom, Kim, which is a bizarre one scene cameo where Doreen begins to feel “pressure.” The film never elaborates on it, and in fact, ultimately, the vagueness is a constant problem here. Knowing that this film is leading to an ending where Squirrel Girl quits, it would make more sense to elaborate on this scene a tad more, perhaps with Robbie defending Doreen and saying she can be Squirrel Girl as long as she wants. Knowing that she’ll eventually agree with Kim, this would be a great time for Doreen to actually consider the possibility of quitting being Squirrel Girl. But no, we gotta move on super quick because she needs to “take a walk” because she feels “more pressure.”
  15. Speaking of which, I want to make a quick sidebar into a discussion that I’m sure will come from me claiming this film lacks themes, and directly relates the proceeding point: there is a difference between something being complex yet subtle and something being horribly vague. Throughout this entire movie, it’s impossible to really place what the point of the messaging or themes are, and I know some might go “Blank just missed it because it’s too subtle.” If the only point I can gather from your superhero movie is that you don’t need to do hero work to be a good person, my argument would be 1) this isn’t actually subtle at all, it’s beating you over the head with this and 2) this is inherently vague because I (or any child hypothetically watching this film) do not do hero work. I’m not a superhero and thus I’m stuck here looking what themes or messaging is applicable to my life. I feel like there has to be SOMETHING intended to make an impact here. Yet ultimately, it feels like there’s nothing of note to draw from it, and not because of subtlety, but because of a lack of specificity.
  16. Dr. Doom gets brainwashed and turned into an easily mind-controllable cyborg. Refer back to my “worst depiction of Dr. Doom yet” comment
  17. “Melissa notes the heroes are too far away and in order to prevent it from being traced back to her, she hired brainwashed screenwriters such as the Duffer brothers, Rian Johnson, and the MCU writers working on many drafts of the plan.” Honestly wish I could go my entire life without reading another “joke” like this that makes NO internal sense. There is no MCU in CAYOM. However, in the real world, mentioning the Duffer Brothers as accomplished screenwriters also makes no sense. And Rian Johnson is more talented than either of those. It’s just ajtljksdglkdsgjlks
  18. And now we come to one of my most frequent complaints about Endless Animation’s productions. One that oddly hasn’t come up yet (even though I certainly thought it in minor ways that weren’t worthy of a bullet point): the blatant derivative knock-off sequences of recent big animated films (see the wholesale lifting of Rex Dangervest from LEGO 2 into Should You Imagine). The emotional climax of this film, the montage where Squirrel Girl finally sees the big picture, is blatantly lifted from SOUL. I know what you’re thinking. But Blank, you can’t say SOUL created the climactic montage. You’re right, I can’t, but how it’s used in this film, which was posted a little over two weeks after SOUL was released, is basically wholesale how it’s used in that movie, minus the Malick-esque montage. This film even evokes it directly with, “upon realizing the epiphany” following the montage, when the montage in SOUL is outright titled “Epiphany” in both layman’s discussion of the scene and for the soundtrack listing.
  19. Furthermore, even ignoring the attempt (whether consciously or subconsciously) to rip off the latest Pixar movie’s emotional climax, NOTHING IN THIS SCENE WITH THE EPIPHANY IS APPROPRIATELY SET UP. The film constantly leaves Squirrel Girl’s directionless aspect of her life vague outside of the montage during the time skip, but never really has other characters bring up the idea to her of retiring or her duty to be a superhero. It’s all internal which would be fine and dandy if there was anything here that made Squirrel Girl seem like an actual character before this sequence. It’s like 12:30am when I’m writing this, so maybe this doesn’t make any sense, but y’know what, I don’t think the idea of buying this scene as a great emotional epiphany makes any sense as this movie has refused constantly to actually put us in the headspace of its protagonist at any given point – outside, of course, when she chooses to “take a walk” because of “pressure.” Alright, gonna try to run through the rest of this because honestly, I think this is kinda the whole point of this review, and this is already 1600 words.
  20. “Dana notes life isn’t a poorly made sequel.” Yes. Yes it definitely is.
  21. How the hell do you “delete money”?
  22. Last note on Doctor Doom: they defeat his brainwashing by making him giggle to the point of passing out. Say it with me: worst cinematic depiction of Doctor Doom yet.
  23. Alright, let’s wrap this up. At the end of the movie, it’s revealed that the entire point of this entire enterprise, the ending the film was working for the entire time, was Squirrel Girl retiring. I don’t think this is a bad ending in theory. I think this ending could work. However, this film makes a crucial mistake in its messaging, besides its vagueness, and it kinda goes back to what I said about Dana, and can be applied to Robbie or her animal friends. These characters never talk about the idea of Doreen quitting being Squirrel Girl. Doreen doesn’t float the idea, or tell them she’s tired. And I get it, the attempt here is to make an internal conflict that Doreen is overwhelmed by. However, the film utterly fails to make this ending feel like matters as there is no sense that the other characters remotely even have a reaction to her quitting, besides Dana who is just proud of her friend finding “peace.” The best characters are built on their relationship to other characters, and since not once in this movie did these characters ever have a serious conversation, or even a joking conversation about Doreen’s future (outside of the scene with Robbie’s mom that weirdly gives Robbie no agency within it), the ending (and likewise, all the characters in this film) falls totally flat emotionally. This ultimately a film that’s isn’t really telling a story, it’s telling a plot. It’s chesspieces moving around to get to its pre-engineered ending without having any real reason emotionally to reach there, just some lip service about “being stressed” and “her kindness and drive to help making her being who she is”. But don’t worry, the movie ends just in time to have a rap song that is completely unrelated to the film itself.

 

Alright, that’s what I have to say. And a part of me wants to apologize for writing it out, I honestly hate eviscerating films. I don’t think I’ve ever written a review this long before (the closest would probably have to be for Kansas). I do want to apologize for this being so mean at points, but honestly, here are my thoughts here. I constantly read these Endless Animation movies and give the same complaints time and time again. They’re derivative, lack sincerity, and feature no real themes. I know I’m in the minority here because every time I post one of these reviews, there’s generally encouragement of the writing of them, saying that I might be being too harsh on them. Maybe, but I believe you need harshness to improve.

 

Furthermore, in the past, I generally wanted to point out the good stuff in there too to encourage future films, and hopefully, you’ll take my more measured constructive criticism and make something out of it. Yet, constantly, I just feel as though those reviews are shrugged off as “oh, well, Blank didn’t like it but other people did!” and that’s fine! I’m not saying my opinion needs to be law. But it’s frustrating to offer measured critiques of these films and then see them completely ignored. So I needed to really get in-depth here.

 

This film has everything I hate about previous Endless Animation films, that I’ve openly critiqued before, and doubles down on them. It’s an absolutely mindnumbing film that drove me bonkers to read, and I genuinely want you to improve and write animated films that I actually get excited to read, rather than semi-dread once I begin reading them and realizing that nothing has really changed. This is honestly one of the worst animated films I’ve read this game, feeling like what would happen if Illumination got their hands on a Marvel license and released something on the level of their worst efforts. I’m sorry, man, but I had to get this all out. 1/5

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Alright, let's begin.... My top 25 this year, as always will be announced in a weird order. This year, in honor of me finally breaking 20,000 word count with The Last Airbender, I will be announcing this in order of word count. Mixed in will be ten honorable mentions and my top ten worst films of the year. As always also, the top 5 will be saved for the very end. Let's do this!!!

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At 72 words...

 

HM: Doc Dreams

 

At 107 words...

 

23. Bailey Buckets: A Hoops Story

 

At 108 words...

 

HM: The Million-Dollar Jacket

 

At 148 words...

 

9. Home Invasion: Part III - Hunted

 

At 376 words...

 

8. Monster Bug Wars: The Scorpion Path

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At 399 words...

 

5. Monster Bug Wars: The Spider Path

 

At 492 words...

 

7. The Three Caballeros Ride Again

 

At 555 words...

 

24. Eminem-Esque

 

At 617 words...

 

20. Wii Fit

 

At 624 words...

 

1. The Turkey Squad: The Fred Durst Cut

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At 795 words...

 

HM: Levi and Magi in the Santa Job: A Gateways Short

 

At 854 words...

 

13. Funny Business

 

At 1,224 words...

 

3. Slash, Splat, Boom!

 

At 1,378 words...

 

HM: Romance Road

 

At 1,454 words...

 

21. The Idiots

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At 1,884 words...

 

8. Holland Hannah

 

At 1,963 words...

 

HM: Up in the Sky

 

At 2,192 words...

 

14. Losers Weepers

 

At 2,373 words...

 

10. Recompense

 

At 2,381 words...

 

17. Animal Crossing

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At 2,982 words...

 

18. The Wave Heist

 

At 3,386 words...

 

HM: Heartman

 

At 4,623 words...

 

10. Strangers in the Town

 

At 4,957 words...

 

11. Numbers Theory

 

At 5,324 words...

 

HM: Everything We Miss

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At 5,361 words...

 

25. Christie Monteiro

 

At 5,516 words...

 

22. Green Arrow: The Ninth Circle

 

At 5,828 words...

 

6. Flightless Bird: The Downfall of the Boeing 737 Max

 

At 5,984 words...

 

4. The Wild Thornberries

 

At 6,595 words...

 

2. White Wyvern

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At 6,921 words...

 

HM: The Gnashing

 

At 7,870 words...

 

HM: The World That We Knew

 

At 9,797 words...

 

7. The Space Between Trees

 

At 9,809 words...

 

12. Sins of Their Fathers

 

At 11,396 words...

 

15. New Tricks

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At 11,697 words...

 

16. Dirty Hands

 

At 13,040 words...

 

HM: Pokemon: The Case of the Orange Outrage

 

At 13,427 words...

 

9. Olive's Hallowed Eve

 

At 14,968 words...

 

4. Endless Animation's The Un-title-able Squirrel Girl Sequel

 

At 20,004 words...

 

19. The Last Airbender: The Boy in the Iceberg

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And now.. the top 5:

 

At 4,710 words...

 

5. Sandboy

 

At 8,354 words...

 

4. The Bronx is Burning

 

At 8,854 words...

 

2. Learning to Care

 

At 9,135 words...

 

3. Everything I Never Told You

 

At 13,105 words...

 

1. World of Trouble

  • Astonished 4
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