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Hiccup

Hiccup's Critical Review Year 6

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Request one of your major films and a filler created by somebody else.

 

Reviews will look like this

Film A- Percent %Short Consensus

Prediction on box office potential

Go ahead and request!

 

Chart100-95%: Fucking Amazing Film that Completely Blew My Mind94-90%: Best Picture Heavy Weight89-80%: Great Film79-70%: Good Film69%-60%: Average Film50-59%: Solid film with a few flaws49-35%: Solid film but has strong flaws34%-25%: Flawed greatly24%-10%: Awful film but watchable given the circumstances9%-5%: Unwatchable4%-0: Just quit CAYOM please

Edited by Andrew the Alien
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Texans Hate Zombies- 65%

 

Texans Hate Zombies is a gritty, funny, and altogether entertaining b-horror flick. The film is constant fun from beginning to end and a must see for the dull September season.

 

Predictions: Zombie flicks typically don't do well and the same goes with b-horror movies. Giant Spiders did turn this norm around. THZ won't reach Giant Spider's height but will give a solid performance. 20M/45M 

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Cyber- 94%

 

Steven Soderbergh triumphs once again with Cyber. With its intense storytelling, gripping premise, and Nicholas Hoult's great performance, Cyber is a must see film event of Year 6. 

 

Predictions: While the R rating might hold the film back on the opening weekend, the powerful flick will probably see strong legs throughout the dead months of August and September. It will definitely benefit box office wise, from staying out of the Oscar flick ridden October, November, and December. Look for 20M opening weekend and a finish around 85M-90M and maybe 100M if it gets an Oscar rerelease.  

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The Impact of Sir Roger the Alien 2- 10%

 

The first film was amazing and a complete blast but this follow up doesn't break out of the mold. Same jokes+generic storyline=dull film experience.

 

Predictions: This film will mostly likely see a classic second weekend plummet. Look for a front loaded opening weekend and a quick finish. 35M/75M

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The Book of 4Chan- 15%

 

While funny in some parts, The Book of 4Chan is gravely offensive and feels awkward to watch. 

 

Predictions: The film has a limited run for the most part and it doesn't appeal to a broad audience. Look for a 10-15M finish for this vulgar flick. 

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Fresh rating for THZ!!! Woo!!!

 

It's so strange how the original version back in the old CAYOM became one of the most fondly remembered random fillers of Version 1.0 (I believe I made it back in Year 20).

 

 

I loved it! It had flaws but was a fun film to read

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Murder at the Superbowl- 39%

 

A solid thriller. The premise feels worn down and used often in CAYOM. The film is intense and visually pleasing in some areas of the film. It is good February thriller entertainment. 

 

In Year 3, Horror at the Superbowl opened with 39.8M and finished with 89.5M. Audiences might have forgotten about that film already but I honestly doubt it. Look for a 15M opening weekend and a rapid decent from theaters with a 35M finish. 

 

 

Haunted Hoax- 28%

 

Haunted Hoax relies more on comedy than horror to entertain its audience and sadly the comedy isn’t a hit. The film is simply a forgettable event. 

 

Haunted Hoax is a comedy/horror flick and the majority of the time these flicks don’t do very well. Nothing in the film shows a breakout hit. Look for a opening around 10M and a finish close to 25M. 

 

 

Bounty Hunters From Heaven- 50%

 

Relatively original and unique, Bounty Hunters From Heaven is a solid comedy that will entertain most with its strong cast but offensive premise.

 

Predictions: With little competition in the April months, this film could be a hit. However it will probably fall along the generic and predictable comedy gross of 18M/50M. 

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