Cap

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #6 JAMES T. KIRK AND MR. SPOCK from Star Trek: Wrath of Khan 19 POINTS, 6 LISTS Prompt: Kirk and Spock meeting on a train when Spock falls asleep on Kirk's shoulder. The granddaddy of modern fandom, and arguably the most important slash pairing ever, Kirk and Spock have finally taken their spot on our list. I was going to find a gif, but this scene is just so much, they love each other so much, it's only logical to post the video. AO3 TAG

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #7 STEVE ROGERS AND TONY STARK from Captain America: Civil War 17.5 POINTS, 5 LISTS Prompt: Tony giving Steve a piggyback ride. WE NEVER GOT THIS. WE NEVER GOT THE HUG AND FLY. JOSS ROBBED US OF SO MUCH. Do you remember that time in the comics when Civil War happened, and Steve and Tony met in the ruins of the Avengers Mansion to talk it out, only to have hate sex? Or the time in the comics that they declared that if Steve and Tony had just married Civil War never would've happened? These were such good times. Then Joss Whedon took over the MCU Avengers, and copped out by deciding to just go for boring old "The Man Out of Time and The Futurist Don't Like Each Other" route instead of Team Gay Dads like Bendis in New Avengers/Heinberg&Cheung Young Avengers. Oh trust and believe, it still works. But if you'd told me thirteen years ago I would've been shipping Steve and Tony Hate Sex instead of Steve and Tony Soulmates, I would've laughed in your face. AO3 TAG: THE TWICE-TOLD TALE BY ARYSTEIA

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #8 JUDY HOPPS AND NICK WILDE from Zootopia 16 POINTS, 6 LISTS Prompt: Judy and Nick playing a co-op video game and Judy keeps dicking around and Nick just wants to get past the first level god dammit. I'm very excited to announce that we all rallied around @cannastop to get this Furry Pairing into the Top 10! What happens when a street smart fox and a by the book bunny team up to solve crime? Magic. AO3 TAG

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #9 TWO WAY TIE 15.5 POINTS, 4 LISTS Thelma and Louise from Thelma and Louise Prompt: Thelma and Louise finger painting with their child. If people had pushed for this as canon, I would've counted it in a second. These women are such GOALS. Just as iconic as Butch & Sundance. AO3 TAG Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes from Captain America: Civil War Prompt: Steve booping Bucky's nose with their finger. Y'all know how I spent two days going "lol incest is cool, fandom is just weird, it's fine". Well, I take all of that back. Incest is gross. You don't fuck your brother. I don't care how attractive they are!!! Is this the worst ship of all time? Has this ship created such a toxic environment in the Steve Rogers fandom that everyone has turned Steve into the villain because How Dare He not love Bucky the EXACT WAY that you think he should love Bucky? I mean, I suppose the whole "bucking the World Governments and turning your back on everyone to protect the one you love" is super romantic, but I prefer to focus on how "Steve Rogers dumped his ass in Wakanda so he could go off for two years with his husband and wife, Nat and Sam, to stay in shitty hotel rooms." AO3 TAG: Enjoy your 60K tagged fan fics. I'm so jealouuuus

Uncharted No. Niles Meh. Scream Yes. I'm waiting on Dog. I feel that one is gonna be the best of the bunch.

I have a very very active imagination. My brain is noisy. It sometimes ruins films for me, because I can figure out the ending based off the trailers or by the end of the first act. I've spent a lot of time training myself to just shut off my brain when I watch things. I don't want to figure out who the kill is. I don't want to think about the logistic of time travel. I just want to go, suspend my disbelief, and immerse myself in a world for an hour and forty minutes. (YES, I said what I said! Hour! Forty! Minutes! Not 2 and 40 minutes!!) It's been a really, really long time since something's forced me to rage quit this hard. I hated everything on my screen. We're talking I Hated, Hated, Hated This Movie levels. Tom Holland is hilariously miscast as Nathan Drake. What part of that white paint can screams rugged adventurer? I don't believe he can even grow a beard. I spent a lot of time thinking "So this is what Peter does while everyone forgets he exists." Antonio Banderas should file a lawsuit for crimes against his personhood in this completely wasted role. Mark Wahlberg is worse than normal. I don't know how, but he is. Sophia Taylor Ali and Tati Gabrielle are super easy on the eyes, there is zero depth beyond that. The movie, despite filming in these beautiful locations, looks so cheap with bad CGI.

I really loved all of this. I liked that the movie knew exactly what it was, and who it was aimed for. It didn't try to do any more or any less. That worked for me. It's Scream. It's supposed to be a meta slasher comedy about teens murdering each other; and that's what we got. I DIED at the Rian Johnson directed Stab 8 and ruined my childhood gag. That was perfection. Utter perfection. There's talk in the movie about how slasher films are just empty vessels for blood and cool killers, whereas elevated horror has meaning -- I liked that Scream goes against that. Maybe it's cause there's been five of them, but what really got me was how many woman are on screen, and their relationships with each other, and how they talked about their trauma of surviving a horror movie. Some really nice moments there.

Okay, no more Olympics and no more sleepy time medicine that kicks in 1.5 hours before it was suppose to. Top 10 Fanon, Revealed, TONIGHT.

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #10 JESS BHAMRA AND JULES PAXTON from Bend It Like Beckham 13.5 POINTS, 4 LISTS Prompt: Jess making Jules their favorite meal when they are having a hard day. Baby lesbian me was so mad they didn't get together, and I still am!!! AO3 TAG

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #11 THOR AND LOKI from Thor: Ragnarok 11 POINTS, 5 LISTS Prompt: Thor: Ah shit; Loki: Watch your fucking language. And we're back to Incest! We love it as fandom, and who wouldn't when it's Thor and Loki. They hate each other. They love each other. They need each other. They never want to see the other again. It's messy, and human, and just wonderful. Doesn't hurt that they're pretty on the eyes either! AO3 TAG

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #12 STEVE ROGERS AND SAM WILSON from Captain America: The Winter Soldier 10 POINTS, 3 LISTS Prompt: Sam and Steve adopting an orphan. THIS IS THE GREATEST SHIP OF ALL TIME. I HAVE NEVER SHIPPED ANYONE SO FAST IN MY LIFE AS I DID DURING THIS SCENE IN THE WINTER SOLIDER. THERE IS NOTHING HETRO ABOUT ANYTHING THEY DO. THIS IS THE FACE OF A MAN THAT KNOWS IT'S SEXY MARVIN GAYE TIME. ALSO DO YOU REMEMBER THAT TIME THAT THEIR LOVE SAVED THE UNIVERSE AND CREATED THE MOST ICONIC POP CULTURAL MOMENT OF THE 21ST CENTURY AND OF ALL OF CINEMA EVER? I C O N I C AO3 TAG: So because the AO3 Tag for these boys is a like navigating minefield, I'm just going to link to astolat's Captain America series featuring Affinity and Breaking News.

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #13 SPONGEBOB AND SQUIDWARD from Spongebob: The Movie 10 POINTS, 2 LISTS Prompt: Spongebob and Squidward at a theme park or carnival, and walking towards one of the many games to win a large stuffed animal. Spongebob is sure that they can win the game, but after many attempts (and lots of cash down the drain) Spongebob gives up. Squidward, however, tries and succeeds on their first go. Nothing sexier than an old fart and his over eager puppy. AO3 TAG

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #14 THREE WAY TIE 8.5 POINTS, 2 LISTS Rambo and Trautman from Rambo: First Blood Prompt: Trautman tucking Rambo's hair behind their ear to help them get it out of their face. AO3 TAG: There's only six, and they're all in Russian, but apparently here's some fan art with Steve Rogers involved!!! Aragorn and Eowyn from Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers Prompt: Aragorn giving Eowyn a back massage when they flop on the couch or bed. I feel like I used that prompt before but when it popped up it was just too perfect with the gif, so I kept it. A classic example of a ship that just makes way too much sense to be canon, despite the fact, they are WAY BETTER SUITED FOR EACH OTHER!!! This Battle Couple shows others how its done! AO3 TAG Aragorn and Legolas from Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings Prompt: Legolas and Aragorn and their friends end up having to all sleep in the same room. Nobody can get any sleep because Aragorn is snoring incredibly loud... Except for Legolas, who's completely used to it. This is just quintessential "I'm taking the two most beautiful people in the cast and I'm gonna imagine them having sex" shipping. And I'm here for it!! AO3 TAG

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #15 DRACO MALFOY AND HARRY POTTER from Harry Potter Series 8 POINTS, 2 LISTS Prompt: Harry and Draco backpacking across the world. Ah, Harry Potter. The series that all Millennials learned about sex from. Not the books, you know, since they're children's books. The fan fic! Somehow this series managed to produce some of the more effed up fan fiction! It got so bad they had to shut down fanfiction.net and create AO3 so we could have our porn in peace. AO3 TAG - Beware clicking this. There's 53,912 results and most are porn!!

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #16 TWO WAY TIE 7.5 POINTS, 3 LISTS Miles Morales and Gwen Stacy from Spider-Man: Into The Spiderverse Prompt: Miles is the barista at a coffee shop and always screws up Gwen's name on purpose. The ship also received a vote for the canon list. (Someone's clearly ready for Part I this year!) Behold! As everyone's fighting about MJ and Peter, witness the superior ship from the superior Spider-Man movie. AO3 TAG Lumiere and Cogsworth from Beauty and The Beast (1991) Prompt: Lumiere and Cogsworth were separated for several years for reasons they couldn't help. They finally find each other and have a heartfelt reunion. We lost so much when we lost Howard Ashman. I remember shipping these two before I even knew what shipping was. I just knew they were meant to be together!! AO3 TAG

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #17 ROCKY AND PAULIE from Rocky 7.5 POINTS, 2 LISTS Prompt: Rocky and Paulie sharing ice cream/cake/a dessert. I have never seen this movie. I'm just gonna trust you on this. There are no AO3 stories for this ship! So go write some!

It’s amazing what like a month and a couple extra minutes of sunlit will do for your psyche. Have four movies planned this weekend. We were supposed to take my grandmother to dog, because my mom is so excited. We even joked about how we were trying to take our dog to go see it. But grandma decided she did not want to see the dog movie, so we ended up at Death on the Nile. My Mom and I thought it was fine. Grandma thought it was very confusing, And had too many people, and she said that if you could explain/understand the movie should give you $1000. Mom and I were both like: “Well, see, it’s like…” 😂😂😂 My friend and I plan to do uncharted And scream tomorrow. And then we’re gonna take the kids to see the dog movie on Monday.

Far as I'm concerned, There's Brett, and then they're just the pretenders.

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #18 BRIAN AND DOM from The Fast and The Furious 7 POINTS, THREE LISTS Prompt: Brian and Dom remembering their first kiss... and they have very different takes on it. These films are about FAMILY. And sometimes you just want to watch family fuck each other. (Waves to the Supernatural Fandom.) AO3 TAG

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #19 TWO WAY TIE 6.5 POINTS, 2 LISTS Barney and Christmas from The Expendables Prompt: Lee and Barney having a tickle fight until they're breathless. Sometimes you just wanna watch two Daddies wrestle for domination. AO3 TAG Riggs and Murtaugh from Lethal Weapon Prompt: Murtaugh and Biggs chilling out on beds and couches at a furniture store. This is going to sound bonkers now, but true story, there was a time when Mel Gibson was not only insanely popular but people thought he was totally fuckable. His ickiness can't stop this ship; or this movie! Despite everything Donner's classic still fires on all cylinders. This is textbook shipping. AO3 TAG

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #20 JACK SPARROW AND ELIZABETH SWANN from Pirates of the Caribbean 6 POINTS, THREE LISTS Prompt: Elizabeth following Jack's family traditions that they enjoy. I'm told that every girl wants a bad boy. Elizabeth might've gone back to the young and noble Will Turner, but we all know in her heart of hearts she's a pirate looking for only the excitement and adventure a Captain Jack Sparrow can provide. AO3 TAG

Me: I'm gonna do fan fic recs!!! Me, One Minute Later: wait all the good fan fics are just porn and this not an NSFW site. Me, Two Minutes Later: i'm just gonna link the generic AO3 tag!!

21 GREATEST FANON SHIPS OF ALL TIME! #21 TWO WAY TIE 6 POINTS, 2 LISTS Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid from Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid Prompt: Etta drawing on Butch and Sundance's face when they sleep. They wake up to see each other faces covered in silly doodles. So I said I wasn't going to do analysis -- but that doesn't mean I can't do some commentary! 😝 It just didn't seem right to leave these two ships off the fanon list, when they are such iconic slash pairings. Butch and Sundance have become shorthand over the years for cowboy BFFs. Paul Newman and Robert Redford are beautiful and they are even more beautiful together, and I wonder how Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes felt watching William Wyler's Captain America (1965) realizing Steve looks exactly like Alexander Pierce. AO3 TAG Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson from Sherlock Holmes (2009) Prompt: Holmes and Watson trying to hide their relationship. However, it turns out everyone knows they're dating. You all think the #RestoreTheSynderverse people are coo-coo for Coco Puffs, they have NOTHING on the legendary crazy of the Holmesan Fandom of 1893. Mourned in the streets. Wore black arm bans. Badgered Sir Arthur Conan Doyle for TEN YEARS until he conceded (aka was paid enough) to start writing Holmes and Watson stories again. We owe so much crazy to them. There are TONS of great Holmes and Watson adaptions out there (cough WATCH THE JEREMY BRETT VERSION cough), but for slash purposes this one really takes the cake. The film, and particularly its sequel, nailing Holmes and Watson's codependency is a thing of beauty. I'll toss the glove down saying Jude Law's Watson is the absolutely best. Just perfect for RDJ's eccentric -- yet actually really canon accurate -- Holmes. AO3 TAG

And that concludes today's festivities. We're reached the Top #74, so a perfect place to pause while y'all wonder what made the list and what just fell short! Tomorrow, I'll be back with our FANON LIST.

#75 - Simba and Nala Points Movie Ship # of Lists Average Points 10.5 the Lion King (1994) Simba / Nala 3 3.5