El Squibbonator

September 15, 2022

They'd better. The way things are looking now, they're going to have another Lightyear on their hands.

September 15, 2022

I didn't mean to slack off like this again, I really didn't. But to make it up to you guys, I'm going to knock out both September and October today, followed by November and December tomorrow.

September:

Spoiler

Seals of Honor

I wasn't expecting to randomly pick another documentary film for one of the September reviews. Nor, for that matter, was I expecting to like it as much as I did. Unlike Heart of the Amazon, where whatever educational content might exist in the movie is drowned out by saccharine voiceovers, Seals of Honor is a refreshingly frank documentary about the seals (and sea lions, and walruses, can't forget them) of the world. There's still plenty in this movie for audiences to chew on, though, from some truly stunning live footage of a battle between elephant seal bulls on South Georgia Island to a rare observation of the critically endangered Mediterranean monk seal. Instead of excessively personifying its subjects, this documentary emphasizes that these animals inhabit a world completely different from our own, one that we can only visit, but could never live in.

That's not to say I don't have criticisms, though. The film is rated G, and in theory it's suitable for all audiences, but some scenes, such as the elephant seal fight and another where a polar bear kills a ringed seal pup, are quite intense; I can't help but wonder if a PG might have been more appropriate. There's a 10-minute animated segment near the beginning showing how seals evolved from their land-dwelling ancestors; I found this unnecessary compared to the rest of the movie. Overall, better than most theatrical documentaries, and that alone is enough to recommend it.

8/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Invader Zim

Reviewing a movie like Invader Zim is, to put it bluntly, hard as *bleep*. This is not a movie that was made for critics. It was made for fans of the cult favorite Nickelodeon cartoon, whose characters adorn many a Hot Topic poster and backpack pin. No doubt they will flock to it. If I were to review this movie as a standalone work, I probably wouldn't "get it"-- but luckily I do have at least some experience with the show, and I can say that it does, at the very least, serve as a worthy companion to its surface material.

The story should be familiar to anyone who has watched the show. Zim, an alien invader, and his robot sidekick G.I.R., are forced to pose as a child and his dog in order to carry out an invasion of Earth. He's opposed by a conspiracy-theorist student named Dib, who is the only person who is ultimately convinced Zim is an alien. If you're a fan of the show, you'll love it. If you've never watched the show, you'll probably at least be able to understand the story, which is more than I can say for a lot of TV show adaptations.

7/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Acne

Nobody likes getting acne. If you're self-conscious about your appearance, the idea of a zit showing up on your face is a disturbing thought. It takes a truly, delightfully twisted mind, though, to turn a simple case of acne into material for a horror movie, and that's where Jake Hammond does what he does best. Acne is a horror movie for our times, a glimpse at the dark side of our social-media-obsessed world and the lengths some people will go to impress others, as well as the dangers of the body standards we place on women.

The scariest part of this movie is that there's nothing supernatural happening at all-- every single piece of disturbing *bleep* that happens in it is something that could actually happen in real life, and could very well happen to people like Gina. That is scary. The real horror here isn't what Gina endures that drives her insane, but the fact that our beauty-obsessed society is in many ways responsible for it. Plenty of horror movies are exploitative, but this one truly wishes to put its money where its mouth is, and for that I have nothing but praise.

10/10 Potatoes

October

Spoiler

Warmth

I'm not sure what I was expecting going into Warmth. All I know is that I wasn't expecting it to be anything like the kind of movie it is. The plot? There isn't one--at least not the kind I can adequately summarize. This isn't a movie you watch for the plot. The main character's arc consists of a series of spiritual quests, culminating in musings about the nature of war and the human life cycle. I'm almost at a loss for how to judge it as a movie. I mean, *bleep*, at least bad movies like Interceptors and Whinge and Cringe were bad in obvious ways. But Warmth is something new-- it's a totally different beast from the mass-produced output of modern cinema. And for that and that alone, I can respect it.

A lot of the artistic choices made in Warmth, like filming it in black and white, feel like they were put in for the hell of it rather than because they served any real artistic function to the movie, but that's my only major gripe with Warmth. Perhaps I might not be so forgiving towards it if I had different expectations of it, but as it stands, I didn't really have any expectations at all.

8/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Mechamen

Well, well, well, what have we here? A movie about giant robots that isn't an anime adaptation? That's something you don't see every day. With the possible exception of last year's Frankenstein Jr. , giant robot movies haven't been doing too hot lately. Mechamen, on the other hand, clearly has franchise ambitions, what with all the brightly colored robots from different countries that the hero must fight in a United Nations tournament. The model kits, I imagine will sell themselves, assuming the movie is a success. And don't even get me started on the licensed video game.

That's not to say Mechamen is objectively good, though. Once you see the hero's backstory, you can pretty much guess how the story is going to go-- the hero fights his way through the ranks of the tournament, and gets revenge for the death of his brother. This movie has a lot of strong areas, but originality isn't one of them. Neither is subtlety, for that matter. At some points, it feels like it's begging to be taken seriously as a work of cinematic art, but at others, it feels like it's perfectly content to be a movie about 70-foot robots beating the *bleep* out of each other. I don't hate Mechamen, but it's not the sort of movie I would give full marks to. It's a good way to kill a couple hours, but not much more than that.

6/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Guinea Pigger

Zen riddle: How do you make a sequel to a *bleep* movie about an evil guinea pig? Ideally, the answer should not be "by making an even more *bleep* movie about an evil guinea pig. I've seen some less-than-stellar animated movies this year -- Dinosaucers, Molly and Emmett, and most of all Alakazam-- but Guinea Pigger just might be the worst of them. All those others at least had some mitigating aspect to them. Alakazam had an interesting premise that was just poorly executed. Molly and Emmett deserved a rating lower than G, but I suppose first-graders wouldn't mind. Dinosaucers probably appealed to fans of cheesy 80s cartoons. But Guinea Pigger? I've got nothing. None of the other animated movies I've seen this year come close to this pile of guinea pig droppings. Yes, I know it's a sequel. Yes, I've seen the first one. And no, I don't think the first one is any better. I expected better out of Phoenix Fire than this.

2/10 Potatoes

September 7, 2022

Fossil Record Animation Conference Reveals Studio Plans

Hot on the heels of Fossil Record's collaboration with Peter Chung and C. M. Kosemen, the company held a shareholder meeting today in which they revealed a great deal about the company's upcoming plans. The actual meeting was several hours in length, and cannot be reproduced here in its entirety. However, with Mark Pierce's permission, we have compiled a list of the highlights from it that will likely affect the studio's plans going forward.

-- Citing the lackluster critical reception to Dinosaucers, Molly and Emmet, and last year's Frankenstein Jr., The Workshop-- Fossil Record's label for children's and family films-- will be reorganized. No currently-in-production Workshop movies have been cancelled, but they will proceed with more oversight from the main Fossil Record movie division than they did before.

-- In The Piper's Wake will take the previously established release date of The Xenoscope in Y10, due to it being more complete. The new release date for The Xenoscope is unknown, but most analysts expect it to be in Y11 or Y12.

-- Pat Mills, creator of Judge Dredd and other famous British comics, was mentioned to be "in talks" with the studio regarding the upcoming 2000 AD movie adaptations-- Judge Dredd, Flesh, Strontium Dog, and ABC Warriors. His actual role in the movie is unknown. A spinoff ABC Warriors TV series was also stated to be in the planning stages, but nothing more was said about it.

-- A previously-unknown movie was revealed. Titled Fishergirls, its release date, rating, and director are unknown, but the poster at the conference shows a tiny wooden sailboat underneath a pink sky with two moons, with three figures standing on it.

September 7, 2022

Don't know if it counts as a "franchise", per se, but I want to adapt this weird little piece of online fiction.

September 1, 2022

Spoiler

War on Drugs: America's Modern Conflict

Is it common knowledge that the "war on drugs" we were all taught about in high school was really just a big pile of racist *bleep*? I'm pretty sure it is, but that's not going to stop this Spike Lee documentary from exploring why. Granted, it's a lot more interesting than I expected it to be, especially because, contrary to the title, it isn't just about America. A lot of the movie is spent comparing America's history of drug use and management with that of other countries, most notably Portugal, where drugs have been decriminalized since 1999. However, the movie also doesn't seem to want to go so far as to actively blame any specific person or group of people for the state of things in America. There's no convenient "villain" here, just the cold, unfeeling forces of history.

Documentaries are always tough to review because they require a different frame of reference than regular movies. It's hard to imagine something less suitable for a family night at the movies than War on Drugs: America's Modern Conflict (well, unless your family's name is Addams or Manson), but at the same time I personally liked it. This is a thinking person's documentary.

8/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

The Mirage

Be real with me, guys. How long has it been since we've had a straight-up Western? Not a "Western satire", a "sci-fi Western", a "horror Western", or whatever. I feel like it's been a really long time. Even if it hasn't, and I'm just imagining things, The Mirage is probably the next best thing. It's definitely not a straight Western-- there's a lot of horror and even a little magical realism in its DNA-- but you can definitely tell where most of the goods come from. Glenn Powell plays an arrogant, cocky bounty hunter who is tasked with finding a missing girl, only to be drawn into an adventure involving zombie coyotes, bird-mask-wearing cultists, and a woman who seems to exist in two places at once.

The Mirage is like its namesake, difficult to grasp the true form of and seeming to operate on a completely separate plane of existence. It's brilliantly, madly incoherent. And I love it for that. If the Western genre has to merge with other genres to survive, then at the very least, those movies should be as creative and enjoyable as this one. That isn't to say that The Mirage doesn't have problems, of course; Glenn Powell's protagonist Ralph Thompson is a difficult character to like, but the story more than makes up for it most of the time.

8/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

HOOOOOPS

For HOOOOOPS, my succinct review would have been as follows: "Decent effort, 5 out of 10, nothing to write home about." I don't like to spend more time than I need to writing about movies that honestly aren't worth the effort. HOOOOOPS (and yes, that is the real *bleep*ing title) is one of those movies. It's produced by Infinite Studios, the company that previously gave us turds like Johnny Test and Meme Thieves. Judged by that standard, it's probably safe to say this is the best movie Infinite has made so far. But a good movie from Infinite is pretty much the same as a mediocre one from any other studio, and I'm not going to play favorites.

Plot-wise, the movie is predictable. It's every sports movie you've seen before, which I suppose is a good thing, since it means the movie doesn't have room to be truly bad. At worst, it's mildly annoying, and at the very least it's watchable, which is more than I can say for anything else from the same studio. I'm optimistic that this is a sign of good things to come from them, and not just a fluke

5/10 Potatoes

Because I've been slacking off, I'm going to do August today too.

Spoiler

Gran Turismo

This movie is supposedly based on a video game. I say supposedly because the marketing and the movie itself seemed to intentionally downplay that aspect of it, instead selling it as a generic racing movie. And "generic" might be an understatement here. Even though I've never played any of the Gran Turismo games, I could predict the plot of this one just from seeing the trailers. Boy meets girl, boy and girl bond over racing, boy and girl have fallout, boy loses girl big climactic race, boy gets girl. That, in and of itself, is not a problem. At least, not a big one. The problem is that there's no real reason for this movie to be a Gran Turismo adaptation. You could tell that exact same story with original characters, and nothing would change. Now, I understand that the Gran Turismo games themselves don't exactly have much in the way of lore that could be adapted into a movie, but this movie does the bare minimum in terms of adaptation. It's essentially a boilerplate racing movie with the Gran Turismo label slapped on because that's a brand that sells.

4/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

The Talons of the Hawk

This is a sinister, wickedly effective horror movie-- not just for the nature of its villain, but because it invokes a much more everyday fear that many people have, that of flying. Far too many horror movies seem to think that if you put in a scary enough monster, then it automatically makes for effective horror. Not true. Good horror, at least in my opinion, plays on fears people have in real life, and at this The Talons of the Hawk succeeds splendidly. That's not to say that the more supernatural elements are an afterthought. On the contrary, I found David Dastmalchian's role as the monster to be visually arresting in a way few horror movie monsters are anymore.

Unfortunately, I can't say I approved of the choice of David Mazouz, who does not have autism, to play autistic character Donavan Hume. In an age when autism is becoming more and more visible, if not more accepted, movie studios should be willing to meet them halfway. However, this does not detract from the quality of the movie itself, and it is well worth seeing.

9/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Scythe

Scythe is a refreshingly original and engaging entry in the formulaic YA dystopia genre. Eschewing the deadly games and love triangles popularized by the likes of The Hunger Games and Divergent, it asks the opposite question: "What if nobody died?" You see, in the world of Scythe, medicine has become so advanced that death from natural causes is unheard of, and people regularly live for centuries. To keep the world from being overpopulated, special killers called Scythes are employed to periodically kill people at random. The movie itself-- based on a series of novels by Neal Shusterman-- follows the story of a pair of Scythes-in-training, who must learn the secrets of their trade while also discovering a conspiracy that threatens to upend everything they thought they knew.

This is a dystopian YA movie done right. Instead of simply aping more successful entries in the genre, it asks real, philosophical questions. What is the reason for death? Is it right for humans to try to overrule nature? Would a world without suffering be a world worth living in?

10/10 Potatoes

August 24, 2022

Spoiler

Xenoblade Chronicles: The Power of the Monado

Full disclosure, I've never picked up a Xenoblade game in my life, which perhaps makes me a more impartial judge towards this movie than I might be otherwise. Good adaptations of any source material need to stand on their own, and not simply sell themselves on a brand name. That goes double for video game movies. Last year's Pokemon: The Case of the Orange Outrage understood that, and so did this year's Super Monkey Ball. But every so often, you still get a turkey. Xenoblade Chronicles is in the latter category. Technically, the movie is fine. But unless you're already a scholar of Xenoblade lore, you'll probably be completely lost. Half the dialogue consists of jargon that anyone unfamiliar with the series won't get, and there isn't an engaging enough plot to balance it out.

Unless you're a serious Xenoblade completist, give this one a miss. It's not really worth your time.

3/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Matilda and the Night Children

There are a handful of animated kids' movies this year that emotionally moved me. Fossil Record/Workshop's Raven Island was one. Matilda and the Night Children, from Endless Animation, was another. It's an emotional, sometimes tragic, always heartfelt story about a woman who discovers her true worth not just as a mother but as a human being with the help of the spirits of several children. The storytelling is, I want to say, Pixar- or Ghibli-tier, and the animation is beautiful, as is typically the case from Endless. My biggest compliment, however, goes not to the movie itself but to its production staff, for the detailed research they did with the Barbados setting and consulting the people living there to make the movie feel so authentic.

Matilda and the Night Children is a prime example of what good animated storytelling can do, and if more animated movies were like this, I'm reasonably sure the world would be a better place. I've always had a special place in my heart for Endless Animation's works, and Matilda and the Night Children simply reaffirms that. This is a true all-ages animated movie that does not talk down to its audience in any way.

10/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Second Dimension, Last Hope

A lot of people either really like Second Dimension, Last Hope, or really hate it. I'm honestly neither. It runs into some of the same issues that Interceptors did, namely a threadbare plot, characters as two-dimensional as the title, and gratuitous special effects at the expense of good storytelling. Unlike Interceptors, however, it's at least watchable most of the time, and the ending left me genuinely curious what a sequel might be like (assuming it does well enough for GMS to greenlight one, that is). In other words, Second Dimension, Last Hope is more or less the textbook definition of a popcorn movie. You watch it for two hours to see crazy explosions and cheesy one-liners, but nothing more than that.

If I were judging it by those merits alone, it would probably get a high score. But judging it as a work of cinema as a whole, it's. . . well, not abysmal, but certainly not something I'd recommend on principle. If you want to watch it, fine, but don't waste a theater ticket on it. Buy this one on DVD or wait for it to come to streaming.

4/10 Potatoes.

August 24, 2022

It's probably going to be Hulu. They already have other Cartoon Network series on there.

August 23, 2022

Just to clarify, the Batman: Caped Crusader cartoon has not been cancelled. It was planned for a simultaneous release on HBO Max and Cartoon Network, and will still be airing on the latter as part of its ACME Night block. But it will not be streaming on HBO Max; the company is instead shopping it out to other streaming services.

Not trying to downplay the severity of all this by any means, just making sure we don't get carried away with misconceptions.

August 23, 2022

I was talking stuff like Batgirl.

August 23, 2022

As of July, word is that it's looking at a theatrical release instead of, or as well as, an HBO Max one.

August 23, 2022

I dunno, people still watched House of the Dragon in record numbers. If they put something on it that people want to watch, they'll watch it. Warner Bros. is shooting itself in the foot right now.

August 23, 2022

6 minutes ago, AJG said:

In the US they just lost 300,000 subs, their growth is slow internationally, and about 40 million people are getting the service for free through their traditional HBO Subscription. On top of that: streaming does not yield the high revenues of cable. It costs a lot to operate and makes too little.

Did it ever occur to them that the reason they've lost so many subs is because they're taking stuff off the service?

August 23, 2022

So how come theatrical movies and shows on legacy TV seem to be safe, for the most part? It's only HBO Max that they're gutting.

August 23, 2022

Essentially, yes. At least that's my reading of all this. All of the cancellations we've seen have been for shows and movies intended exclusively for HBO Max. Those that were intended for theatrical release, or for traditional television, have for the most part been unaffected. Notice how Batman: Caped Crusader is being shopped out to other streaming services? There's a reason for that. See, Batman: Caped Crusader was intended for both HBO Max and Cartoon Network, so while it's no longer going to premier on HBO Max as per the original plan, it's presumably still going to air on Cartoon Network.

I'm not entirely sure what Zaslav hopes to gain from gutting HBO Max, but whatever it is, it doesn't seem to be affecting theatrical movies or linear TV. I guess we should count ourselves lucky that's the case, because if he were to set his sights on those other areas I would lose what little sanity I have left.

August 14, 2022

Spoiler

AeroMobil: The Future Is Now

"Where's my flying car?" If there's any question that sums up our disappointment with the present compared to our predictions of the future, it's this one. Our parents and grandparents thought that in 2022, we'd be zooming around like George Jetson in personal aircraft, but as they say, reality bites. In light of that-- along with the fact that the titular flying car has been in development since 1990, and is no closer to production than it was then-- the optimism on display in AeroMobil: The Future Is Now seems more than a little misplaced.

Half of the movie is more or less a history of previous attempts at personal aircraft (the movie is careful to avoid the term "flying car" for some reason), from the 1940s to the present. This makes up the more interesting part of the movie, and if you dig that sort of thing the historical anecdotes and interviews might be enjoyable. The second half, unfortunately, is not like that. It more or less consists of AeroMobil founder Stefan Klein boasting about the wonders of his flying car (hey, even if the movie doesn't call it that, I still can!). It's easy to get sucked into the hype in a movie like this, but ultimately there are better ways to learn.

6/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Fatal Error

There's a thing I call the Taco Bell Effect. Basically, it means that a domestic imitation of a foreign commodity is never going to do well with fans of that commodity. It's that way with Mexican food and Taco Bell, and it's also that way, it seems, with Japanese horror movies and American imitations like Fatal Error. This movie's flaw is that it tries far too hard to imitate Japanese horror movies like Ringu or The Grudge, but this leaves it without any narrative or creative identity of its own. Watching Fatal Error, a sort of "uncanny valley" reaction starts to creep over you. Why the *bleep* am I watching this? What makes it different, let alone better, than the Japanese movies it's blatantly ripping off?

Technically, the movie is fine. The story is decent, if standard for its genre. And that, I suppose, is the issue. Fatal Error is so dedicated to copying the visuals and narrative choices of other, better movies that it's left without anything to really make it distinct. The best thing I can say about Fatal Error is that if director M. J. Bassett set out to make the American equivalent of a J-horror movie, then he definitely succeeded. Unfortunately, in doing so, he created a movie that's a pale imitation of what it's trying to be.

3/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Revenge Ex

I'm not usually a fan of romantic comedies. The jokes rarely land with me, the plots tend to blur together, and as someone who eschews romance in my own life I feel like there's a big part of it I'm not in on. So it might come as a surprise that I actually kind of like Revenge Ex, and not even in an ironic "so-bad-it's-good" way. That's not to say it's a flawless movie-- far from it-- but I found it far more engaging that most other romantic comedies I watched. Tom Holland and Zendaya provide excellent chemistry, and their characters Emma and Jonah are a great odd couple who are fun to watch.

If this movie has a weak spot, it's the structure. It suffers from a bad case of what I call "ending fatigue", where the story seems to have wrapped up a good half-hour before the movie actually ends, which left me kind of wondering what the rest of it was actually building towards. Will Gluck is definitely having fun with this one, and a lot of things in this movie seem to have been put in purely to ensure an R rating. If you must watch any romantic comedy this year, you could do worse than this one.

8/10 Potatoes

August 11, 2022

4 hours ago, dudalb said:

I find it hard to believe that cuts of the size that Warners is going to have to make will not iresult in layoffs on the creative staff.

Of the recent cancellations, I think the Te Nehsi Coates Superman has been pretty much dead for some time.

As a Green Lantern fan, I always thought a GL movie done right would be better then a TV show.

I still think DC has not made up it's mind what do about SUperman. I still am skeptical about Cavilll coming back .

There will be some, I'm sure, but according to the insider leaks I read, they won't be as severe as we've been afraid. Most "high-level" creative staff who have signed distribution deals with the company after the merger will be staying.

August 10, 2022

So I don't know if it's been discussed here, but here are a number of takeaways from the aftermath of the WB shareholder's meeting. You can find most of them at that link, but here are a few of the more interesting ones. Much of this information is from Hollywood insider David Poland.

The panel were asked how they expect the creative community to work with them after axing a near-completed project, and they said it was a "one-time instance" and said their commitment to movie theaters would attract the right talent.
They vehemently denied the rumors that the layoffs would affect Warner Bros'. creative teams
The layoffs are expected to come between August and September.
More information on the cancellation of Batgirl was revealed. Long story short, Discovery-WB never actually signed off on it, and they considered it an undesirable leftover from the previous owners. They could cancel it without it looking bad on their books, because they weren't the ones who green-lit it.
Movies, TV shows, and distribution deals that were approved after the Discovery merger should be considered safe unless proven otherwise. These include Peacemaker season 2, the Amanda Waller spin-off, Matt Reeves’ stuff (a new Batman animated show, plus shows about Arkham Asylum and The Penguin), and the Green Lantern show.

So, yeah, still not good news exactly, but not as bad as some of the more sensational articles have led us to believe.

August 9, 2022

Speaking of A24, why didn't they give Marcel the Shell a bigger release than they did?

August 9, 2022

You mean this article?

August 9, 2022

I'm not sure, to be honest. But there's no way he's working at WB for much longer. But another person I'm curious, and a little nervous, about is Genndy Tartakovsky. He's in a rather interesting position in that, on the one hand, he's a legacy producer with a lot of clout at the company, being the creator of Dexter's Laboratory, Samurai Jack, and Primal. But on the other hand, the sort of things he's making now-- Primal and something called Unicorn: Warriors Eternal-- don't particularly strike me as the sort of thing a studio trying to cut down on risky projects would want to fund, even if Primal did win five Emmys. WB signed an exclusive distribution deal with him in June, which was already after the Discovery merger, so make of that what you will.

August 9, 2022

Stepping away from The Flash for a moment, do we have a good idea of what directors, producers, and other creators are likely to be handed the pink slip in the near future-- not just in movies, but in TV too? I've seen some speculation that J. J. Abrams's deal with WB might not last much longer, since it was signed in 2019 and hasn't really amounted to anything, to say nothing of the fact that his TV show Demimonde was cancelled in June for going over-budget.

August 9, 2022

Fossil Record Collaborates with Chung and Kosemen

About two weeks ago, Fossil Record Studios CEO Mark Pierce cryptically alluded to "new talent" that would bolster the fledgling animation studio's reputation. Now, it seems, the identities of at least two of those people have been unofficially revealed, thanks to social media posts. Both are veteran artists who have a reputation for making the kind of offbeat work Fossil Record strives to release under its main label.

Three days ago, Peter Chung (best known as the creator of the TV series Aeon Flux) tweeted "#BlackWater" and an emoji of a whale in response to a fan inquiring if he had any upcoming film or TV projects. Black Water is the title of an upcoming Fossil Record film with no set director or date, which has been described as a "hard-R animated horror movie" about a young pilot whale enduring the grindadrapp, or Faroese whaling season. While it is unknown if Chung is in fact the movie's director or if he has another role, his surreal, dark animation that made him so famous with Aeon Flux fits quite well with the movie based on what is known about it.

The other collaborator, surprisingly, is not an animator or even a filmmaker at all, but Turkish science-fiction artist Cevdet Mehmet Kosemen. He is most famous as the writer and illustrator of All Tomorrows, a novel about the future evolution of humanity that became an internet sensation last year. Unlike Chung, Kosemen directly confirmed his involvement with Fossil Record, going on to say, "The rumors are true-- Snaiad is becoming a movie! I've been tapped by Fossil Record Studios for an undisclosed position." Snaiad is Kosemen's longest-running project, an online field guide to the wildlife of an alien planet. The plot of the upcoming Snaiad animated movie is unknown, as is whether or not it will employ Kosemen's signature watercolor style of drawing.

While being careful not to name the new talent, Pierce spoke excitedly about them at a conference today. "We're excited to have contributors who are outside our normal wheelhouse-- people who are, as I see it, real artists, not just Hollywood animators."

August 4, 2022

2 hours ago, MCKillswitch123 said:

Hide contents

I respectfully disagree that American Spy is either tonally inconsistent - it's very much trying to be a grounded spy movie, with some sexiness and some action, but mostly focused on the character growth of Marie Mitchell and her views on the world around her - and treating complex themes like a backdrop - the sociopolitical ideologies and morphing of self-made perceptions of the world around Marie are literally the main focus of the film.

However, I do respect your opinion and criticism and thank you for reading the film and taking time to review it. I also apologize if I'm coming across as stuck up in any way, I don't meant that or to offend you in any way

Spoiler

Well, at the very least I can't say I was able to gather that from my reading of it, so make of that what you will. I knew this would be one of my more contentious reviews, since other reviewers seem to have liked this movie, but it just had too many issues for me to give it a high score.

August 4, 2022

I made American Spy the third March review.

Spoiler

Heart of the Amazon

Theatrical nature documentaries are like professional wrestling, and that's not a compliment. Everyone who watches them says they're real, but anyone with half a brain can tell they're staged, and frankly it's insulting to the intelligence of people who insist upon real science in their documentaries. The animal characters in Heart of the Amazon-- each one, of course, played by multiple individuals-- are charming, but the saccharine stories that the narrator tells about them make me wonder who, exactly, this piece of *bleep* is aimed at. Is it for children? I should hope not. We live in a society where people are still trying to wrap their heads around the idea that the Earth is billions of years old; the last thing we need is so-called documentaries dumbed down to the point they are devoid of all educational content.

Oh well. At least the animals are cute.

3/10 Potatoes

Spoiler

Devil Bean

Stop me if you've heard this one before. There's a magical bean that grants superpowers, and all sorts of weird people are trying to get their hands on it. And they have names like Hippoman, Robo-Jojo, and Bambang. Devil Bean is one of, as they say, those movies, and it's all the better for it. This is a movie where you check your common sense at the door and just enjoy the ride. You might call me a hypocrite for recommending this movie after I trashed Interceptors, but there's a difference. Interceptors is horribly derivative, ugly to watch, and just plain boring. Devil Bean, to its credit, is none of those things. I certainly couldn't predict many of the story choices they made with this one, and the character designs are a lot more memorable too. What I'm getting at is, I don't like it when dumb movies think they're smart. Luckily, Devil Bean is under absolutely no delusions about what kind of movie it is, and it succeeds at that goal splendidly. Give it a watch, there are worse things to do.

8/10 Potatoes.

Spoiler

Bikini

Ah, the 60s. A time when the feminist movement as we know it today was just getting started. This is the world that Vanessa, the heroine of this odd little movie, lives in. But the progressive themes here are misfired and shallow. Sure, Vanessa acts the part of a prototypical 60s feminist, but her boyfriend Shawki feels like an uncomfortable stereotype of a conservative, anti-feminist Muslim. It would have been fascinating for the movie to explore him going on a journey of cultural awakening parallel to Vanessa's, but we don't get that. Likewise, her friend Angie's past pregnancy could have been used to add some depth to her character, but we don't find out enough about it to care. Even Vanessa herself doesn't change much over the course of the movie-- no big revelations, no self-discovery, nothing like that. Things happen to her, sure, but for the protagonist of a movie about feminism, she seems oddly passive. Bikini definitely gets points for trying, but that's it.

5/10 Potatoes.

August 4, 2022

3 hours ago, MCKillswitch123 said:

Hide contents

With all due respect to your opinion and your review, I feel like this is a bizarre approach to criticizing American Spy. Yes, it's a spy thriller that leans more towards realism and thematic exploration than it does suaveness and crazy gadgets. I fail to see what's wrong with that. I guess you're trying to say that you're not sure if the movie is trying to be exciting or serious, to which I answer, "why can't it be both?"

Spoiler

It's a bit of a personal issue I have, speaking as myself, not as Spud the Couch Potato. I'm not a really big fan of movies that can't seem to decide on a consistent tone, and I'm also not big on movies that treat complex real-world issues simply as a backdrop. American Spy, unfortunately, has both of those issues. It's still a very competent and well-made movie, which is why I let it off with a 6 out of 10-- and I might amend that to a 7, to better reflect how much I actually enjoyed it. But it still contains two major things I don't look for in a movie.

Sign In

Profiles

Forums

Events

Blogs

Gallery

Annual Subscriptions

Media Demo

Posts posted by El Squibbonator

Important Information