Xillix Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 36 minutes ago, YourMother the Edgelord said: Like a shower head. Ah, under the water as in under the streams of water, not a surface. Right. Makes sense. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 tfw you like a movie you're reading so far but realize it has major plot similarities to one you'd intended for this same year and delayed and now yours will feel like a ripoff 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YM! Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 3 minutes ago, Xillix said: tfw you like a movie you're reading so far but realize it has major plot similarities to one you'd intended for this same year and delayed and now yours will feel like a ripoff Which one? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 So, Wallace is allowed to return to the set after just one day of not acting even remotely more rational? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 tfw you get further into the plot and realize its similarities to another movie of yours you DID release this year 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 AUGUST A Fool's Errand "A solid and well-paced, if relatively generic, family fantasy that looks the part and doesn't suffer from an overabundance of plot baggage. Unfortunately it WILL likely suffer at the box office given its uncomfortably proximity to Amulet II; hopefully the much more kid-friendly runtime will help." The Guardian of the West "It's fine. It was smart to attempt to address the overexposure of the film's subject in fictionalized media, cutting through the myths somewhat. At least it's not just another Discovery Channel nature special." By the Balls "A well-intended but unfortunately muddled satire. Frequently unpleasant and only sporadically funny, and likely to be willfully misinterpreted by the very people it attempts to mock." Resonance "Well-acted but marred by iffy structure, a rushed pace, flat characters and an ending that feels like a cop-out." The Last Day of Summer "Perfectly serviceable preteen fluff." 1 1 1 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YM! Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 5 minutes ago, Xillix said: By the Balls "A well-intended but unfortunately muddled satire. Frequently unpleasant and only sporadically funny, and likely to be willfully misinterpreted by the very people it attempts to mock." 5 minutes ago, Xillix said: Resonance "Well-acted but marred by iffy structure, a rushed pace, flat characters and an ending that feels like a cop-out." What a twist! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 (edited) @Blankments Edited October 20, 2018 by Xillix 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 SEPTEMBER Citizen Welles "A solid dramatization of the production of that one movie everyone is supposed to at least pretend to like, and frankly a hell of a lot less boring than its inspiration." Tulpa "A suspenseful, slow-burn horror-thriller with its share of memorable moments but a rather anticlimactic ending that betrays its online urban-legend roots." Big Enough "There's almost no plot. It's one kind-of-funny-at-first joke for over an hour and a half." Outside Man "Might have been good if there were any effort put into the script, but it's ultimately just an unimaginative and inessential retread." Lucid "There's some impressive VFX trickery here, but it's hard to care when it's in service of a frustrating and thoroughly un-involving skeleton of a plot that's constantly introducing arbitrary rules and fails to provide compelling stakes, a hint of context, or anything approaching actual characters." The Second Crash Bandicoot "A step down from the original, too sloppily-edited and manic for its own good. There are still funny moments, decent visuals, and some reasonably entertaining action scenes, but adults will likely have a harder time sitting through it. Kids will probably love it anyway." 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ezen Baklattan Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 @Blankments JONNY JONNY IS NEXT 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rorschach Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 @Xillix I’ll take a 3/5 anyday 🙃 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 21, 2018 Author Share Posted October 21, 2018 @Spagheditary If the entire movie is in black and white how can we even tell it's a blue BMW? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ezen Baklattan Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 Just now, Xillix said: @Spagheditary If the entire movie is in black and white how can we even tell it's a blue BMW? As you’ll soon find, I didn’t edit the movie at all...the color is pretty arbitrary anyway, lol. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 21, 2018 Author Share Posted October 21, 2018 So is Lisa the dead guy's grandmother or just some random old lady? Sugar momma? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ezen Baklattan Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 Just now, Xillix said: So is Lisa the dead guy's grandmother or just some random old lady? Sugar momma? Grandmother. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 21, 2018 Author Share Posted October 21, 2018 OCTOBER Jonny, Jonny: The Movie "I'm mostly surprised that it's kind of an actual movie. That doesn't make it good, or funny, but since this is clearly a money-laundering scheme they could've just compiled the web videos and thrown them up on the screen. The presumably unofficial use of all the popular licensed characters is probably going to get them sued into oblivion and force an injunction against releasing the movie, so if you're desperate to see this for some reason, you should probably hurry. At least it's more legitimately amusing than Johnny Test." Leviathan "A rote, by-the-numbers, un-creative adaptation of the bizarre historical sci-fi novel, which doesn't do nearly enough to fit the text into a cinematic form or introduce the uninitiated to the lore and terminology. Only worthwhile if you're a diehard fan of the books desperate to see a big-budget visualization." Broadway Selects: The Iceman Cometh "It's a good production of a good play, though it loses a lot of its impact as a pre-recorded screening in a movie theatre." Baked Sale "Sure, it's kind of funny, if oddly moralistic for an R-rated drug comedy." Bats "Just another Discovery Channel nature special." The Square Mile "A generally solid crime-thriller that's structurally interesting and holds together well with the exception of a nagging illogical point or two. The acting is strong and the action is exciting. Unfortunately, it's also rather predictable, even with all the time-jumping, and McDonagh's usual biting humor is sorely missed." 3:37 AM "Why is there a time loop? Who is that guy? Where did he go? If this is found footage then who the fuck is filming it?" Starlit Highway "A strong, simple story with great performances that doesn't overstay its welcome, but could have benefited from just a bit more editing and refinement." 2 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 21, 2018 Author Share Posted October 21, 2018 Also tfw ANOTHER movie you're reviewing has striking similarities to that some one of yours 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ezen Baklattan Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 @Xillix the lawyers at Hourglass Pictures are some very, VERY skilled people. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YM! Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 13 minutes ago, Xillix said: Baked Sale "Sure, it's kind of funny, if oddly moralistic for an R-rated drug comedy." Did you like the short? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xillix Posted October 21, 2018 Author Share Posted October 21, 2018 2 minutes ago, YourMother the Edgelord said: Did you like the short? 🤷♂️ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
