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Hiccup

Hiccup's Critical Review Year 4 Top 25 Officially Up!

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Alright I will go through this year and review all the films or at least try to starting with January and ending with December. I am starting today but if a new film gets up I will through it in.Sample ReviewTitleMy consensus about the film (similar to how RT does it)Score (In percentage)

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Call Me Maybe

Call Me Maybe fails with humor and horror and leaves audiences wondering why the hell did they spend their money on this.

4%

MaZ3

Relying solely on grue and guts which will entire Saw fans, MaZ3 however only reminds us that the quality of horror is declining.

16%

The Homestarmy Invades!

Annoying, poorly done, and boring, The Homestarmy Invades! will only entertain the smallest of children.

10%

Sasquatch 3D

While the 3D and CGI are well done, Sasquatch suffers from bland dialogue and humor along with a generic storyline.

23%

The Immune

The Immune manages to shine in the mist of the gloomy January with Ryan Gosling's strong performance along with solid action sequences and interesting storyline.

57%

A Stark Night

While funny at moments, A Stark Night falls flat when it comes to storyline and acting.

32%

Columbine

Columbine is well acted, wildly intense, dramatic, and frightfully realistic however these elements might turn many away who are sensitive to teenage violence and drama.

86%

Lady Gaga: Born This Way 3D

Only Gaga fans will flock to this and the rest of the nation will never know this came out.

8%

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Bone: Vernal Equinox

Funny, great animation, and fun story, Bone: Vernal Equinox rises to the occasion to delight both the young and old.

72%

Madea's Valentine

Madea remains only a delight to her core audience and this new installment maintains that and hopefully it is the last.

25%

Unbalanced

Utterly frightening and suspenseful, which will spend tingles up anybody's spine, Unbalanced preys on everybody's everyday fears and will give many in the audience sleepless nights.

73%

Pokemon 2

This new installment of Pokemon remains a solid sequel to the first but fails to rise above it, as so many sequels also fail to do.

55%

Forever Yours

Forever Yours trends the familiar ground of romantic dramas but Carey Mulligan and Joseph Gordon Levitt offer some entertainment for fans.

42%

Six Souls 3D

Six Souls is generic, dull, and a complete bore.

2%

Army of Two

Fun, action packed, and strong visuals, Army of Two makes up plenty for the mediocre acting.

59%

Phone Conversations with Mother

While it didn't seem promising, Phone Conversations with Mother, is funny and well acted, which will delight audiences who seek comedy in the February blues.

65%

City of Darkness

The 3D and stunt work are solid, but the acting and storyline can't save this film, which relies too heavily on its action.

17%

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39 Steps- 61%

While not my piece of cake, 39 Steps is an enjoyable comedy with surprisingly well acting and a great score.

The Conondrum- 52%

The Conondrum is generic in every sense of the word however it is fun and Sacha Baron Cohen makes a hilarious villain.

Dawn of Souls II: Rebirth- 64%

Like Pokemon 2, Dawn of the Souls II: Rebirth can't seem to rise above the first film but that doesn't mean it is bad but it means that it didn't reach its full potential. Dawn of the Souls II: Rebirth is filled with gorgeous visuals, decent score, and solid acting. Solid follow up to the first but nothing more.

Sylvarius- 92%

With a well casted voice cast, stunning animation, and a beautiful score, Sylvarius might not be a classic but it sure is the best film of March by a long shot.

The Lost Planet of the Sleeping Creature- 1%

The title interesting title to this film is completely misleading, The Lost Planet of the Sleeping Creature is bogus and 100% stupid.

Illusionio 2 (3D)- 53%

Violent, stylistic, impressive visual effects, and beautifully done 3D, Illusionio 2 rises in these areas but fails flat as with the first in script and acting.

On the Set- 67%

Informative and interesting, On the Set will be loved by film fanatics and maybe outside audiences but most who are not interested in film it will be a bore.

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Weird Al Yankovic: Insert Title Here in 2-D- 0%

This film is weirder than Weird Al Yankovic and even Gaga's concert movie is better. Avoid this like the plague.

Mermaid- 20%

Your typical teenage chick flick with your ditzy blond girls and your six pack ab guys. Nothing new to see here folks.

Best Friends Forever- 84%

While audiences might feel overloaded by the violent school films this year, Best Friends Forever is a eye opening, truthful, and dramatic story of a bullied young girl that will show audiences how bullying and teen stereotypes harm our youth psychologically. Also hats off to both young ladies who did a wonderful job acting!

Decker- 58%

While it has solid animation and voice casting, Decker falls flat when it comes to storytelling and doesn't make the audience truly love its heros.

Paranoia 2- 62%

Paranoia 2 is the same story as Pokemon 2, Dawn of the Souls II: Rebirth, and Illusionio 2, it is a nothing more than a solid sequel to a well received first film. Paranoia 2 is filled with the same good kills and suspense, along with good acting for a horror flick, as the first film had.

Death of a Strawberry- 69%

While the story is childish and simple, Death of a Strawberry will delight young audiences and parents with its funny jokes and good moral story.

Service- 9%

Obnoxious and not funny basically sums up Service. Ricky Gervais is annoying as usual and the acting and script are bad.

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Top 12 Pre-Summer

1. Sylvarius- 92%

2. Columbine- 86%

3. Best Friends Forever- 84%

4. Unbalanced- 73%

5. Bone: Vernal Equinox- 72%

6. Death of a Strawberry- 69%

7. On the Set- 67%

8. Phone Conversations with Mother- 65%

9. Dawn of the Souls II: Rebirth- 64%

10. Paranoia 2- 62%

11. 39 Steps- 61%

12. Army of Two- 59%

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Divisions- 74%

J.J. Abrams nails it again with Division. While not his best film to date, Divisions is nevertheless an intriguing and well done film with strong visual effects and good performances from Matt Damon and Judi Dench. A solid start to summer year 4.

The Flash- 83%

The Flash is another successful comic book adoption. With strong acting, a brilliant Danny Elfman score, and impressive visuals, The Flash is a most see summer blockbuster! The only down side is the 3D which doesn't seem to work for the film.

Call of Duty: Of Their Own Accord- 80%

This is the first sequel this year to rise above the first film. Call of Duty 2 boasts amazing visuals along with surprisingly good acting. Paul Greengrass really knew how to use every penny of the budget, which was a mere 150M.

Once Upon a Mattress- 27%

This film fails flat for me. The songs weren't good at all and the voice cast didn't do a good job at all. It was just one big giant summer bore for me but will probably be well liked by female audiences who seem to have low standards when it comes to films anyway :P

Battle Mars 3D- 8%

Battle Mars only can boast good 3D and nothing more since the animation is cheap and the story has been told a million times.

Bohemian- 40%

Bohemian wants to be an Oscar film so bad but it just can't. The acting is great but the script and storyline walks the thin line of being sentimental or over dramatic, which Bohemian is overdramatic.

Our City- 97%

Breathtaking animation, amazing vocal performances, and an original script are what make Our City a stunning film that will draw all different age groups of people into its brilliant storyline.

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Midnight: Children of the Damned- 35%

A definiate step up from the previous two. The medieval setting works really well for the film but the acting is still bad and the script is choppy.

Taking Names- 79%

A very funny movie! Great cast and great story/jokes. Definitely the best comedy so far of the year. Must see!!

Booster Gold- 36%

This film doesn't do it for me. 1. The director didn't work for the movie. 2. Didn't feel any connection with Levi's character. 3. Finally the story is just blah and like The Flash the 3D doesn't work. Go see The Flash again if you want superhero or go see Giant Spiders if you want something different. The score is the only upside of the film along with alright visuals.

Giant Spiders- 77%

I don't know why I like this so much. It is just a very fun summer flick and doesn't take its self to seriously. Giant Spiders is a tribute to B movies with a terrific storyline and actually enjoyable acting.

Rivals: The Abyss- 50%

Sadly Rivals: The Abyss suffers from the Year 4 sequel curse, it doesn't rise above the first film at all. Rivals 2 relies solely on visual effects and ignores continuing the strong script, which the first film had.

Spark- 70%

Spark is a well done film with solid animation and story-telling. It isn't original at all but that doesn't matter. The voice cast is good and the only down side of the film is the lackluster ending which could have been better.

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Let us take sometime now and see what the previous films to Year 4's sequels or + got in reviews from Hiccup's Critical Review.

First Film Rating-----This Year's Follow Up Rating

Pokemon- 66%/55%

Final Fantasy Dawn of Souls- 78%/64%

Ilusiono- 61%/53%

Paranoia- 70%/62%

Call of Duty- 71%/80%

Midnight: Revealed- 34%/35%

Rivals- 72%/50%

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Monthly Review

January- 1 fresh / 7 rotten

February- 3 fresh / 6 rotten

March- 4 fresh / 3 rotten

April- 3 fresh / 4 rotten

May- 4 fresh / 3 rotten

June- 3 fresh / 3 rotten

Half Year Total- 18 fresh / 26 rotten

40.9% of films between January and June are fresh.

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Pippi Longstocking- 15%

Only the littlest of children will love this movie. Anybody 8+ will be bored out of there mind. Crappy acting and lame script.

Nirvana- 98%

Visually beautiful and a well casted cast all make Nirvana a powerful science fiction masterpiece. Russell Crowe deserves nod for his great acting as Lucas. Steven Spielberg creates a stunning world that will thrill audiences. The best part of the film was the score, which was incredible. Steven Spielberg shows with Nirvana that he is still one of the kings of cinema. The film had amazing trailers and it doesn't disappoint. This years must see!!

The Suicide King- 28%

Suicide King offers occasional laughs but basically fails. A complete waste of talent.

Jane and Tony- 19%

Generic and over dramatic basically sums up Jane and Tony. We don't feel a connection to them and certainly don't feel sympathy for them. Wait till the Oscar drama flicks come out for a good taste of drama.

The Last Six- 71%

The idea of this film sounds idiotic and stupid, however The Last Six is a solid film with stunning visual effects (this is a visual extravaganza) and strong acting. The film drags in the beginning and doesn't end as strong as it could. However the film is way better than what I thought it would be like when I walked into the theater.

Comedians- 68%

Hilarious film and well casted. The only down side to the film is that it can be predictable and some might be bored with the idea of real life comedians battling for funniest comedian. Comedians offers relief to comedy audiences who were greatly disappointed with The Suicide King. Ben Stiller's best directed film to date.

Cruisers- 41%

Yeah it is generic, we have heard the same story a million times, and we don't feel a connection with the character but damn the car racing is sweet in this film! The final car race is awesome. Also Elena is one sexy racer chick :P But I sadly can't give this a positive review because of the some what annoying storyline.

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Island of the Blue Dolphins- 85%

With stunning animation and amazing storyline, Island of the Blue Dolphins is a rare late summer gem.

Morgan Spurlock's Shut Up and Take My Memes- 12%

One word for this movie: Forgettable.

Summer Jobs- 22%

Not the worst teen comedy but still pretty bad. The acting wasn't good at all.

The Glass Castle- 88%

The Glass Castle is a beautiful and brilliant film with a gripping storyline. The acting is top notch and Tate Taylor did a fantastic job directing this drama, which avoids being over dramatic and generic. The score complements the film greatly.

Martian Manhunter- 60%

Channing Tatum does a solid job as our next DC Comic superhero but man I am getting tired of all these superhero films. Martian Manhunter is a solid and average superhero flick and nothing more. It isn't as bad as Booster Gold but definitely not as good as The Flash. I feel like if the studio would have spread the films out by year they could have focused on making each film reach its full potential.

Breakout Character- 42%

It isn't a bad film but it isn't a good film either. It is predictable but thanks to solid acting it manages to be entertaining.

Grunge- 33%

It does a good job at targeting its audience but to people outside of the music genre it is weird and not entertaining.

Knights of the Lunch Table- 13%

This is a just straight up lame film. Please families don't go see this. The animation and dialogue are crappy and cheap.

Student Film- 79%

Student Film is a enjoyable film with great acting from both its leads who have great on camera chemistry. The film has an indie film feel with might turn some people away but I found it a fun and well directed film.

Remember Flight 175- 81%

Some might see it as over dramatic because of the 9/11 setting but Remember Flight 175 is a truly heartfelt film with strong acting especially from Sandra Bullock who commands her role. One of the best dramas of the year.

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Thanks for the review on The Last Six. Although I can't really see how you can call it a stupid idea for a movie... :P It's a crossover of a bunch of mythological gods and goddesses saving the world. Much better than some other real life blockbusters. ;)

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