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Wknd "Paramount Actuals": TF4 -100.04M | RTH Favorite Radio Station - 97.5 FM [Actuals pg 11]

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Fancyarcher Global Phenomenon

Fancyarcher

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Narrator: Mitch Donner was a reporter until he was hit on the head and became Sappy Boy defender of all that is sap, fighting villains such as The Bull, The Whirler, or The Squid he keeps the city from danger. Today’s episode Revolt of The Insects.Narrator: Our story begins in Davisville Park, very much down in the grass, as we shift our attention from the big people to the little insects.A group of insects are talking, being led by a Spider who is whapping his mallet on a table.Spider: Order, order! The insect meeting of the committee will commence. Today we are going to be talking about the giants from above. First person is up Mr. Stinque who has a story to tell that we can relate to.A scorpion walks up to the table.Stinque: So I was minding my own business walking along when one of those big creatures almost stepped on me, and it looked like it was intentional. I was flabbergasted, I didn’t do anything to this giant, so why did he try to kill me.The scorpion walks out, an ant comes to the stand.Ant: One of those giant creatures killed my brother. Thank the insect god I managed to escape, but ugh, those giants their fiends and their mean.All of the insects in the stage (consisting of three ants, two flies, two scorpions, and a bee) get into a feud about the humans, with words as “It’s your fault”, and “I blame that stupid bee” being thrown around. Suddenly the spider strikes his mallet.Spider: Silence! We’re never going to get the bottom of this giant problem if we just sit around and argue. Either we need to think of a good plan or we’re going to end up going to that little insect heaven in the sky.Voice: I think I can I help you.All of the insects turn their attention to a Grasshopper wearing goggles and having a beard, as well as being green like all grasshoppers.Bee: Oh look who it is, it’s Gorman the idiot who thinks he’s a genius. Bzz indeed!Gorman: Silence! That’s Dr. Grasshopper Gorman to you, and I have plan to get rid of those giants from above, or as they are known as humans.Ant: What do you suggest we you Grasshopper nut? Try and pinch them?Gorman: No for I have devised a plan, so ingenious, so brilliant, just like myself, that’s there’s no way it won’t fail. It’s flawless.The insects all stare at Gorman.Spider: Yes Gorman, please do tell of your flawless ingenious brilliant plan. We’d all like to know.Gorman pulls a cart around that has a black looking machine that resembles a gun in it.Flies: What is it?Other Fly: That’s what I want to know.Ant: Probably another failed experiment from that lunatic of a so-called genius named Gorman.Gorman turns his face to the ant.Gorman: That’s where you are wrong. May I introduce my size gun? It’s something I wiped up last night. It has the ability to change size, it can make us tiny insects turn large, or make those giant humans into small specimens that we can squish like nothing. My invention is proven, there’s no way it can fail.Spider: Fine Gorman, perhaps you can test out your invention. We of the insect committee would really like to see it in action.One of the scorpions nudges the other, and talks quietly.Scorpion: Personally I think it’ll fail just like that nuts other cuckoo inventions.The scenario changes to Chester Weighton who is taking a walk in the park.Chester Weighton: Gotta burn some of those calories, otherwise my health doctor isn’t gonna be showing me a smile.Chester Weighton runs across the field, as he runs the scene changes to the insects who are all staring at Gorman who is holding the size gun in his hand, aiming it at the sky looking around for somebody to hit. Suddenly Chester Weighton shows up.Gorman: And presto.Gorman fires the gun, a beam of light appears from it, all of the other ants watch, saying “Oooohh!” The beam hits Chester Weighton who gets smaller and smaller as he runs.Chester Weighton (being oblivious to what is going on): Just look at me, I feel like I’m losing lots and lots of weight.As he gets smaller he reaches ant size. As he walks he notices how high the grass is.Chester Weighton: WHAT???Suddenly a bunch of bugs ambush him and grab Chester.Chester Weighton (looking straight at the audience with a confused face): Well this is one way to lose weight.Spider: Excellent work Dr. Gorman, your invention will come in handy in trying to stop this giant er I mean human problem.Gorman and the Spider shake hands.Gorman: And I have plenty more guns where that came from. After all a genius of my caliber wouldn’t be dumb enough not to make some extra guns.The scenario changes to Mitch Donner’s mansion where the reporter is trying to solve a crossword puzzle.Mitch Donner: So E goes into here, but where does F go, oh I’m so confused. I’ve never been good at crossword puzzles why do I even bother in the first placeSuddenly his Sappy Boy alarm rings.Mitch Donner: Danger? This looks like a job for (runs into the closet and comes out as Sappy Boy) SAPPY BOY!He flies out the window.Narrator: As our hero Sappy Boy flies, little does he know of the miniature problem he’s about to face. Meanwhile our little insects are causing quite the commotion downtown.A woman walks around town as she does, she gets smaller and smaller, eventually reaching that of insect size. The woman looks up and sees that everything is bigger, just before she can act a group of insects drag her away. We see similar things happen to an Italian baker who was making a pizza, a Liberian who was sorting out book, and a person working at the bank. All three of these people are shrunk down to insect size and carried away to a nest.Spider: Excellent work Gorman, surprisingly this plan of yours has worked perfectly. We have captured just about everyone in the city, and we have thrown them in this nest, where you will devour them when you get hungry.Gorman: Yes I know, you should come to expect such things from a genius such as myself.Spider: Yes, perhaps I and the other insects have underestimated you.Gorman: Yes perhaps they have.Gorman looks at a bar next to him. Inside it an ant, a fly a beetle and a firefly are inside.Fly: You’ll never get away this Gorman. Hurting the giant world is going to have consequences.Gorman: There’s nothing you can do about it Butch, since you and the other insects who chose to defy me are trapped behind bars. Heh, heh, heh! Eh! I hate my laugh.Gorman: Now all we need to do is find out who the leader of these humans are, and then we’re set. Today the city, TOMORROW THE BIGGER CITY!The scenario changes to Mayor Sam Wolfman at his office. He’s reading a book.MSW: No Julia don’t do it. That husband of yours will just abuse you.Suddenly the door opens. MSW hears lots of things moving.MSW: Hello is anyone there.He looks but he can’t see anything.MSW: Mrs. Nates is that you. I know you don’t like my policy, but we can work something out (pulls out a bowl from nowhere and has a fake smile on). I have free candy.Before MSW can do anything, he is ambushed by hordes of insects who grab him.MSW: What is this meaning of this?He tries to squish the insects, but they tie him up.MSW: Today has definitely not been a good day.Narrator: Meanwhile our hero Sappy Boy is looking through the city, but it appears to be deserted.Sappy Boy: (looks around) where did everybody go? It’s like a comet came out of nowhere and wiped the town clean.Sappy Boy flies around the town when he stops next to the mayor’s office. He sees that the mayor is being tied up.Sappy Boy: An act of villainy. Time to act up. SAPPY BOY IN ACTION!Sappy Boy flies through the window.He stops when he sees that the mayor is being tied down by several insects.MSW: I’m not sure I’ll have the proper excuse to tell my wife why I’m missing dinner tonight.Sappy Boy: So these are the cause of the problem. These Insects? Hmm! I never thought Insects could cause such problems for the city. But you know what they say, small is vicious, or is it size doesn’t matter, or whatever, I’ve gotta stop these tiny villains.Grasshopper Gorman looks over.Grasshopper Gorman: What’s this? It seems we have a clown in our presence.Gorman switches the side of the gun and then shoots at himself, we see Gorman getting bigger and bigger.Sappy Boy: Either he just had one large growth spur or my eyes are deceiving me.Eventually he gets big to the point where he is the same size as Sappy Boy.MSW watches in terror.MSW: Sappy Boy thank goodness you’re here, now you can stop these insects from ruining my good shirt.The insects put ducktape on MSW’s mouth to prevent him from talking. They then throw him into the closet.Sappy Boy: Well you’ve certainly gotten been using your steroids.Gorman: Hello my silly wearing fool. I suppose you’re supposed to be a superhero or something. My name is Dr. Grasshopper Gorman genius of all time, and after years of being stepped up on by you humans, me and my insect friends are going to take over this town that rightfully belongs to us.Sappy Boy: Not if I have anything to say about it.Sappy Boy shoots tears from his eyes.Gorman: Ah so you have powers. We can dispose of those easily.Gorman shoots the ray, causing Sappy Boy to get smaller and smaller to the point where he is the size of an insect.Sappy Boy looks up and sees that Gorman staring at him.Gorman: Now who’s the insect?Sappy Boy: Yikes, that ray of his has caused me to turn pint sized. Need to solve this problem and fast.Gorman tries to squish Sappy Boy, but Sappy Boy jumps before he can.Suddenly Sappy Boy sees that a swarm of insects are attacking him. He tries to defeat them with his tears, but can only hold them off for so long.Sappy Boy: Aaaah!! What’s going on? When I was shrunk tiny my powers must have been weakened in the process.Sappy Boy is eventually tied up by the insects who grab him and take him. Sappy Boy is dragged to the middle of the park, where he sees that everyone in the town is trapped in a spider nest / web.Sappy Boy: Yikes! I don’t like the looks of what I’m seeing.Tim: Jeff this is all your fault.Jeff: No Tim I believe you’re the one to blame.The two get into a fight.Al Swidler: Will you too knock it off, I’m trying to find some treasure around here. Gold, sweet gold.Bucky Dean: Treasure? The end is near, and all you can about is treasure? Are you mad?Al Swidler: No, I’m just greedy.Narrator: Sappy Boy is caught in the madness of all of this talking, he must think quick, using his sad sense, the hero tries to find anything that can help him. Eventually his sense brings him to some voices.Ant: Come on there’s some way we can get out of this prison.Fly: I have no idea, all I know is if we manage to escape we won’t become spider meat.Beetle: Is it just or me does someone smell in here?Firefly: It’s just you beat.Sappy Boy sees a bar next to him containing those four voices he heard, including an ant, a fly, a beetle and a firefly.Narrator: Thinking fast our hero decided to use his sap powers in order to cut through the web of the spider, though weakened he still had enough power to do so.Sappy Boy jumps out of the web and falls.Sappy Boy: Looks like I don’t have my flight powers either.As he jumps down, the rest of the city jumps down with him.Sappy Boy: Alright let’s go kick some grasshopper’s ass.Sappy Boy waves his hand to the people. They follow him as he goes to the bars where the ant, fly, beetle and firefly are.Ant: I’m telling you guys everything’s gonna be fine.Fly: I suggest we find a way to break out of these bars.Beetle: We already tried that and that basically led to the bar becoming even harder to open then previously.Firefly: Is it just me or is it starting to get really loud outside of this bar?Just as the four are about to do something, Sappy Boy comes over with all the other people and manages to loosen the bars by crying a little, causing them to rust and then eventually fall over.Firefly: I knew I heard something in the distance.Fly: Well… human how can we repay you.Beetle: Yeah you got any free grass I could sure go for some of that right about now.Ant: Grass, yummy.Sappy Boy: Not now, we need your help. We need to stop Gorman before he takes over the world.Ant: Well what do you suggest we do, he’s large we’re small.Fly: You know size doesn’t matter.Suddenly the giant spider appears from out of nowhere. Sappy Boy and the others look as he approaches.Spider: Well, well, what do we have here? (Looks down) So you all managed to escape, well your meal’s not gonna be that satisfied considering how big I am.The Spider stomps his bottom, causing the down grass to shake a little. Sappy Boy manages to jump a little, but the others aren’t as lucky as they fall to the ground.Jared The Hobo: Ow!Wendell Fiska: Ow!Coinman: Ow! This reminds me of the time I went to the store looking for… coins, COINS, COINS!Sappy Boy: We’ve got to find a stop him.The Spider attempts to squish them, but Sappy Boy manages to distract him a little by shooting his tears, which all though aren’t very effective do cause some slight damage to him.Spider: You dare challenge me crybaby?Ant: Come on we gotta help him.Al Swidler: Hey, hey, I don’t know if we can trust someone such as yourself as a bug?Beetle: Oh shut up! It’s not like we have a much of a choice.Swidler sees the spider’s butt moving.Al Swidler: Point taken!The four bugs along with all of the citizens of the town all run over to the spider who is trying to squish Sappy Boy, but Sappy Boy keeps jumping every single time.Everyone joins together and they eventually become big enough to push the spider who falls and hits the vines next to him, one that is sharp enough that causes him to scream really hard (ahhh!! OWWW!!) and then falls and passes out.Sappy Boy: Alright everyone on us go.Narrator: As the town marches, we shift our attention from our heroic heroes to Dr. Gorman who is in the mayor’s office enjoying himself.Gorman (sitting on the mayor’s spinning chair): Ah! This is life! But we’re over yet, after this we’ll go and try take over, not just the city, but the world.Next to Gorman, on the side is his size gun. Out of nowhere Gorman hears a hustle and then 2 of his insect guards fall into his door.Gorman: What is this meaning of this? Who dares challenge the great mind of Grasshopper Gorman?Firefly (voice): We do!The door bursts open and Gorman looks down and sees all of the people of the city, as well as the four insects that he locked away (Ant, Fly, Firefly, and Beetle).Gorman: What? How is this possible?Sappy Boy: Alright everyone? Get him.Beetle: Charge!Gorman: Oh no you’re not.Gorman tries to reach for his size gun, but he is attacked by all the tiny people. As he is attacked Sappy Boy runs as he fast as he can and tries to get Gorman’s size gun. Sappy Boy eventually manages to get the size gun and drags it down with him as he gets down to the ground.Gorman manages to get everyone off him and they all fall.Gorman: NOOO!!! (Reaches his hand).Narrator: Gorman is too late, as Sappy Boy regains his full size.Sappy Boy looks at Gorman with distaste.Sappy Boy: Well well Gorman looks like your plan’s officially been turned upside down.Sappy Boy moves towards Gorman who is tremling in fear in his seat.Gorman: I have more guns, a genius like me wouldn’t have been foolish enough not to make more.Sappy Boy: Well sadly for you Dr. Gorman. We managed to get rid of those guns already, cept they broke for some weird.Gorman: They were pretty inferior to my original.Sappy Boy shoots Gorman with the gun causing him to turn back into small size. A frightened Gorman is then placed in a box and sent to the prison.Gorman: You haven’t seen the last of me, my scientific mind will find a way to get out of this prison.The bars slam. Afterwards we see everyone in the city turned back to normal, while all of the bugs are turned small again.Narrator: Meanwhile back at Sappy Boy’s lair.Sappy Boy: So after all that we’ve been through.Ant: Yeah what about it?Sappy Boy: Yeah you see.Fly: Come on, come on, we’re all ears.Sappy Boy: I’ve decided to keep you four bugs, you were surely come in handy when it comes to fighting crime.Beetle: Oh okay, that sounds fair enough after all.Firefly: You know something?Ant: What?Firefly: I think we forget something very important.The scene changes to the giant spider from earlier waking up.Spider: What happened? Where am I?Sid Cracker is walking by.Sid Cracker: Oh a giant spider, I’ve always wanted a giant spider, hopefully this one doesn’t bite that hard.Spider: Who are you? I don’t even know what my name is.Sid Cracker: The name’s Sid Cracker and you and I are gonna get along just fine, Dave.Sid Cracker and The Spider walk off (end).

Edited by Fancyarcher
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Fancyarcher Global Phenomenon

Fancyarcher

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just a warning. They don't become good until the fourth movie, when I really embrace the cheese

 

Thanks for the heads up. I just posted a movie title in the CAYOM section my first one.

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Empire Global Phenomenon

Empire

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You should read the first five in the franchise over in the CAYOM subforumI'd post them here if I wasn't mobile

I remember when I used to do CAYOM. My writing sucked which made my movies suck, so I stopped after year 2 I think.  :lol:

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Fancyarcher Global Phenomenon

Fancyarcher

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I saw that. Looking forward to reading your films, seeing how creative your sketches are

 

I started a little on Where'd The Water Go this year, though I haven't done much, but I've had the idea for the movie for a while.

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Blankments Global Phenomenon

Blankments

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BTW Blankments could you give me a link to those Chuck Norris Liam Neeson scrpts, I'm having a hard time finding them.

can't on mobile But if you go to the stickied CAYOM index, there's one every year in part 1 from year 3 onward to year 7
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