CAYOM Year 3: Discussion

[Ezen Baklattan]

@YourMother the Edgelord Expect feedback for Lilo ASAP - sorry I got super busy this week, so I didn’t get a chance to really read it yet.

[Ethan Hunt]

13 minutes ago, Rorschach said:

Thanks. If I do it well, the sequence in the land of the dead could very well be the highlight of the film (I hope 😬)

I really love the Calypso portion of the story so that's what i'm excited for

[Rorschach]

 

1 hour ago, Ethan Hunt said:

I really love the Calypso portion of the story so that's what i'm excited for

A good chunk of her role in the story will be in film 3. She won’t have THAT much screen time as you might think in this film. 

[Ethan Hunt]

11 minutes ago, Rorschach said:

 

A good chunk of her role in the story will be in film 3. She won’t have THAT much screen time as you might think in this film. 

Ah. Okay.

 

[Ezen Baklattan]

Spaghetti Kitchen: Year 3 - First Look

 

’Lilo And Stitch’ Review

 

The short showed off some really cool animation and had a fun pay-off at the end, even if the story was a bit simple.

 

As for the movie, it’s pretty decent. The casting is rock solid, and the alien effects are really well done. The movie does make a few little changes to the story of the animated film, some of which work better than others:

 

—The opening scene and Pudge’s death feel somewhat melodramatic (especially the former, where the parents’ death was subtly implied in the animated film, while the second feels a bit more jarring and out there)

—So Nani has a deadline to find a job....then she’s somehow working at a restaurant with no prior introduction? Might need an editing fix there.

—Jumba gets a pretty interesting and heartfelt backstory, but maybe tieing it in to stitch becoming reformed as Jumba reforms himself could be an interesting touch.

—David is introduced in the first scene then disappears til the second act. He should be woven into the first bit a little more (just like Tyler in NFTO, heh.)

—The scene where Cobra tells Nani that Lilo will be taken away....and most of the worry is about stitch. Lilo and Nani’s relationship was such a powerful part of the animation that it was kind of sad to not see more done with this. I know it gets followed up later when Cobra actually takes her away, but since we knew it was coming it’s just kind of convoluted.

— Gantu breaking Pleakley’s arm during an interrogation? If you’re gonna be PG, that’s awfully dark, not to mention the tonally jarring nature of that scene.

—The ending kinda feels a bit dragged out, especially the stuff where Gantu holds Space Blanchett hostage, especially when it basically brings Gantu’s motives into question. Obviously he’ll have no chance of getting promoted if he does this stuff!

 

It’s fun to see these characters in a new setting, but it does sometimes veer into awkward tonal spots and confusing inconsistencies. (Also some of the grammar needs a bit of a once over, I think.) It’s fun to watch and well made, but as a whole it’s missing that extra spark.

 

6/10

 

[Ezen Baklattan]

Also @YourMother the Edgelord what exactly was the change that was gonna piss people off? Nothing seemed liked it would give THAT a much of an impression.

[YM!]

1 minute ago, Isle of Pasta said:

Also @YourMother the Edgelord what exactly was the change that was gonna piss people off? Nothing seemed liked it would give THAT a much of an impression.

The Jumba change I might’ve fumbled

Edited April 7, 2018 by YourMother the Edgelord

[YM!]

5 minutes ago, Isle of Pasta said:

Spaghetti Kitchen: Year 3 - First Look

 

’Lilo And Stitch’ Review

 

 

  Hide contents

The short showed off some really cool animation and had a fun pay-off at the end, even if the story was a bit simple.

 

 

As for the movie, it’s pretty decent. The casting is rock solid, and the alien effects are really well done. The movie does make a few little changes to the story of the animated film, some of which work better than others:

 

—The opening scene and Pudge’s death feel somewhat melodramatic (especially the former, where the parents’ death was subtly implied in the animated film, while the second feels a bit more jarring and out there)

—So Nani has a deadline to find a job....then she’s somehow working at a restaurant with no prior introduction? Might need an editing fix there.

—Jumba gets a pretty interesting and heartfelt backstory, but maybe tieing it in to stitch becoming reformed as Jumba reforms himself could be an interesting touch.

—David is introduced in the first scene then disappears til the second act. He should be woven into the first bit a little more (just like Tyler in NFTO, heh.)

—The scene where Cobra tells Nani that Lilo will be taken away....and most of the worry is about stitch. Lilo and Nani’s relationship was such a powerful part of the animation that it was kind of sad to not see more done with this. I know it gets followed up later when Cobra actually takes her away, but since we knew it was coming it’s just kind of convoluted.

— Gantu breaking Pleakley’s arm during an interrogation? If you’re gonna be PG, that’s awfully dark, not to mention the tonally jarring nature of that scene.

—The ending kinda feels a bit dragged out, especially the stuff where Gantu holds Space Blanchett hostage, especially when it basically brings Gantu’s motives into question. Obviously he’ll have no chance of getting promoted if he does this stuff!

 

It’s fun to see these characters in a new setting, but it does sometimes veer into awkward tonal spots and confusing inconsistencies. (Also some of the grammar needs a bit of a once over, I think.) It’s fun to watch and well made, but as a whole it’s missing that extra spark.

 

6/10

 

 

 

Back to the drawing board on this.

[Ezen Baklattan]

1 minute ago, YourMother the Edgelord said:

The Jumba change I might’ve fumbled

Ironically (and I could be in the minority) that was the change I thought had the most positive impact. Maybe flesh out that thread a bit more (framing the experiments as children is a bit creepy) but there is a lot of potential there.

[YM!]

8 minutes ago, Isle of Pasta said:

The opening scene and Pudge’s death feel somewhat melodramatic (especially the former, where the parents’ death was subtly implied in the animated film, while the second feels a bit more jarring and out there)

Any advice on how to improve them? I really want to keep those two scenes.

[cookie]

...Speaking of dark...

[Ezen Baklattan]

3 minutes ago, YourMother the Edgelord said:

Any advice on how to improve them? I really want to keep those two scenes.

I’d frame the experiments less as his “children” and more as his family. May be personal taste but IDK.

 

The big thing I’d suggest is weaving that thread throughout the movie. Maybe also add a bit at the end where Jumba realizes how he found his family, what he had been looking for, this whole time. I think this may be a good way to tie it in.

 

Also, I would let Jumba build up resentment towards Gantu at the start, soon building towards the reason why. 

[YM!]

8 minutes ago, YourMother the Edgelord said:

Gantu breaking Pleakley’s arm during an interrogation? If you’re gonna be PG, that’s awfully dark, not to mention the tonally jarring nature of that scene.

I thought of funnier and lighter replacement scene for that. 

Spoiler

Gantu killing mosquitoes, as Pleakley being a nature lover, eventually gives in

 

15 minutes ago, Isle of Pasta said:

So Nani has a deadline to find a job....then she’s somehow working at a restaurant with no prior introduction? Might need an editing fix there.

—Jumba gets a pretty interesting and heartfelt backstory, but maybe tieing it in to stitch becoming reformed as Jumba reforms himself could be an interesting touch.

As for the former, it was an editing issue and the later was supposed to be in the Stitch confrontation in the forest but I debated on where to put it.

 

 

[Ezen Baklattan]

22 minutes ago, YourMother the Edgelord said:

I thought of funnier and lighter replacement scene for that. 

  Reveal hidden contents

Gantu killing mosquitoes, as Pleakley being a nature lover, eventually gives in

 

As for the former, it was an editing issue and the later was supposed to be in the Stitch confrontation in the forest but I debated on where to put it.

 

 

Fix both of those - I actually like the change you suggested.

[Ezen Baklattan]

27 minutes ago, cookie said:

...Speaking of dark...

NO PARENTS

[YM!]

Just got find out how to fix the opening scene and 

Spoiler

death of Pudge

mainly because I want to keep them in.

 

[Xillix]

Updated - List of weekends that still need completed films

February 15th - Needs 2 films

February 22nd - Needs 1 film

May 3rd - Needs 1 film

May 17th - Needs 1 film

May 24th - Needs 1 film

June 14th - Needs 1 film

July 19th - Needs 1 film

October 25th - Needs 1 film

November 8th - Needs 1 film

November 22nd - Needs 1 film

December 20th - Needs 2 films

[YM!]

Done with Stitch edits.

[cookie]

The opening scene to Scrooge 2 is up.

[Rorschach]

Just now, cookie said:

The opening scene to Scrooge 2 is up.

Ight. I’ll read it.