The MeanGirlsFilms top 58 of 2013. TOP 30 UNDERWAY

[Films]

Well in my view, this year has been a fantastic year for movies and over the next few days I will bring my opinions.

Let's start with Number ???

 

Not Ranked Film [because it is so poor though I might give it a number if I feel kinder on another day: THE HARRY HILL MOVIE

 

Terrible characters, Check, Terrible plot, Check, Terrible Setting, Check, Terrible trying to put in an emotional story, Check, Terrible film, Check. This film was so poor it resulted in me leaving the cinema half way through a film for the first ever time. Johnny Vegas Abe character is pretty bad while Harry Hill disappoints big time. Walters starts off ok before getting terrible while the henchman are awful. Though no one is as bad as Matt Lucas [who I love] who played the villain. An absolutely terrible performance that they tried to mix evil with funny and it just fell flat on its face. The plots were awful, that random boxing fight, the nun and vicar trying to kidnap Abe, just to say the least. This was absolutely torture and I would hate to think what the second half would be like.

 

I Will do more tomorrow 

Edited February 10, 2014 by Mean girlsFilms

[Films]

Two Quick Warnings: There might be some films from 2012 on here but they were released in 2013 here and I might add some more films because there is still films I need to see [notably: were the millers, the heat, the lone ranger, you're next etc]

[baumer]

I wouldn't worry about how many films you have here.  Just do the ones you've seen.

[Films]

Another quick note, im counting Mandela, Walter Mitty and Last Vegas in my 2014 countdown

#59 The Guilt Trip

The first five minutes are laugh out loud and funny but then Barbara Streissand walks in and everything gets worse and worse and worse before it became so unbearable that I had to turn it off on the plane. The film was just going nowhere. Seth Rogen was ok at the start but bad by the time I had switched off, Barbara Striessand is in the worst 3 performances of the year and the supporting characters were disasterous. I don't remember much more about this film other than the fact it was terrible.

#58- Free Birds

At times this film was so bad, it was laughably funny. A film that I thought was going to be funny and great at the time took so many stupid plots, the worst being the reveal of the golden turkey [if it was that], that scene is probably the worst I have seen this year. A usually great Woody Harrelson was absolutely awful as Jake and the writer adding in his 'emotional backtstory' was just horrific. Really though, if you want 2 hours of laughing of how bad a film is, this is the film for you. The humans were all awful and the only ok part was Amy Poehler though whoever played her father was awful as well. Also it was not intentially funny so even the jokes I laughed at in the trailer, were just awful and out of context in the film.

Edited January 27, 2014 by Mean girlsFilms

[Films]

#57- The Croods

One of my most anticipated films of the year ended up being one of the worst and joins the likes of How To Train Your Dragon, Bee Movie, Kung Fu Panda and the even worse Over The Hedge in the terrible/bad DreamWorks film category. A catastrophe from start to finish with all the best parts in the trailer. This is a film where Ryan Reynolds is really bad [and so is he's character] and despite someone else saying he was the best part of it, Nicholas Cage was very bad in my view and again I didn't like how they kind of turned it into a father daughter story at the end. Emma Stone was good [though she always is] and the Grandma was pretty funny at times and the film looked OK visually but it was very boring and predictable.

 

#56- Movie 43

I'm going to do a sketch by sketch breakdown but first a mini review. IMO, this would have been better as a 6 episode half an hour TV comedy while improving some sketches to make them funnier than having it as a film. It did just not work as a film and did not flow together.

Sketch Breakdown

The 3 boys [the one linking everything together]- Well in the UK we didn't get the pitch [so I have no idea how that was] but this one was awful the whole way through the movie, especially the last time I saw it [when the computer exploded and blah blah blah].

The Catch- Kate Winslet was pretty good and Hugh Jackman was ok but this sketch falls down so much because of his neck

Homeschooled- Probably my favourite sketch from the film as it was actually pretty funny and would have actually liked to have seen more of this one

The Proposition- Made me cringe at times but was Ok

Veronica- This was just plain damn awful that got worse every second. Terribly acted as well [sHIT, and I just realised Emma Stone was in this sketch as well as one of the main characters, oh dear]

IBabe- Too short but what I saw wasn't that good

Superhero Speed Dating- This one was kind of funny at times though nowhere near great

Machine Kids/Tampax Adverts- After the 3 boys sketch and veronica, these adverts were the worst part of the film. Incredibly annoying and just stupid and out of place

Middleschool Date- One of the better sketches and Chloe Grace-Moretz was fantastic as usual

Happy Birthday- I didn't really like this sketch, that's all I can say really

Truth Or Dare- A quite funny sketch at times with good performances from Berry and Merchant but at times it took it too far

Victory Glory- Unlike Baumer, I thought this was one of the worst sketches of the film. Unfunny and boring at the same time

Bezzel- It would have been the best sketch if it didn't make me feel sick at one point. Elizabeth Banks was great [and the best performance of the whole film].

Now for a probably controversial choice

#55- Oblivion

This film just becomes way too confusing to be up to date with and comes with three of the worst performances of the year. I'll start with the positives. Andrea Riseborough is just absolutely amazing in every part of the film she is in and acts fantastically

it's a shame they killed her off

and Tom Cruise was quite good. The film also looking pretty amazing visually. That's it on the good part. Parts of it looked animated and really bad and the voice programmer was terrible and was really unconvincing as the villain. Morgan Freeman was terrible in this film which was a shame as he is normally really good in his films but his character was pointless and he made the character even worse and the second half of this film went off the rails after the solid first half. The worst part of the film was Olga Kurlyenko as Tom Cruise wife or whatever. Disastrous in every single way that is possible and made me hate the character even more. Victoria was a way better character than this tripe.

Edited January 27, 2014 by Mean girlsFilms

[Films]

Also I have a new game, big brother films open in the movie and box office games forums and I would love for people to join

[Films]

Spaghetti can start their top 50 at the same time as mine if that's ok because im going to be quite a bit of time. Will try to get some more done later

[Films]

Im really sorry about the delay. I've had a 10 hour geography project with a total time of 1 and a 1/2 weeks to complete it. I will try and get back to this this weekend (though might not as im at the cinema seeing grudge match on fri, football and geography on say and footy exhibition and party sun) or next week

[Films]

I'll try and get some done this evening

[Films]

#54- Olympus Has Fallen

One of the most over-rated movies of the year and im in the minority thinking die hard 5 was better than this. Gerard Butler gave a good performance but the plot was pretty obvious and at times this bored me quite heavily. Also the last 35 minutes were people running around all over the building. It is also very unmemorable so there's nothing much more to say about this film.

Now it's time to get to the OK movies

#53- The Conjuring

The first hour was great with a good amount of creepiness and a couple of scares. But when the mother turned into the demon, the film went off the rails into la la land with no scares and all the performances that were good in the first half, just were all awful in the second half with the exception of Farmiga. I also thought the children were annoying and that ending was just terrible. A real disappointment after everyone said this was so good, Wan and Wilson were both way better in Insidious.

#52- Diana

Naomi Watts was not that bad in this, she just keeps getting the bad press because she's the bigger name. On the other hand, Naveen Andrews possibly gave one of the worst performances I've ever seen as Hasnat Khan [if that is the correct name of the character] who made him as boring, irritating and annoying as he possibly could. The watts and Andrews arguing scenes were embarrassingly bad and all the supporting characters were awful. Also the ending could have been a lot better [make it more emotional and seem better rather than khan just walking to flowers with the most grim look like he didn't really care]. Really unlike what critics said, Naomi Watts saved this film

 

#51- Side Effects

Tatum was good in this when he was on the screen, Jude Law gave an excellent performance and Rooney Mara was really good. But the second half bored me to death apart from some of Law's scenes and the last 5 minutes where there was about 700 twists. I thought the main weak link of this film was Catherine Zeta- Jones. She played her character awfully and the character itself was not good which could be down to character development and the script but she really wasn't needed in this. I thought the

Mara killing Tatum was very good and a massive surprise and the fact that she was not mad

. An ok film brought down by some key areas.

 

#50- R.I.P.D

Again this is a film that has one good acting performance and a bunch of terrible acting performances. And surprisingly, it was Ryan Reyonlds who gave the good performance though his death leading to him being brought into the underworld or whatever was a dreadful scene. Kevin Bacon was annoying but the real problem was Jeff Bridges who was just so unlikeable and incredibly annoying for me. The plot was pretty bad at times though it was OK at a few times to be honest. I really don't remember much about this film but the disguises reyonlds and bridges characters used were awful and they tried to make that be funny but it was just cringeworthy and stupid and unfunny.

#49- Mama

I don't think I've seen a film that has had the last ten minutes ruin the rest of the film as much as this but i'll start with the positives first. Nikolaj Costar- Waldau [who I can't wait to see in the other woman] was great and the scene of him falling down the stairs was the best and most memorable scene. The older little girl was good for the majority of the film and it did provide a few scares. Now onto the negatives. The first 5 minutes were not very good, Jessica Chastain who is usually perfect [especially in the amazing, superb, fantastic, phenomenal, The Help] was pretty poor in this and the villain of Mama was not great. Now time to get to the ending. All it is is Mama and the family standing on a cliff either crying or pleading with Mama to let the kids go in possibly one of the worst endings. I was actually kind of glad when it ended though in general, it was an ok film

#48- Sammy's Great Escape

Probably the biggest disappointment for me of the year. A Turtles Tale: Sammy's Adventures is a major guilty plessure of mine and is just amazing but this sequel dumped most of the characters for more irritating one. Even though Sammy was in the title, on the dvd cover it is literally impossible to spot him and the half villain sea-horse or whatever was so annoying and so were his henchmen. Sammy's daughter or son and Ray's daughter or son were OK but they tried to make the film around them which was not the best of ideas. The human characters also looked dreadfully animated and there were some points that made me want to be sick [the birds pooping everywhere and something else I can't remember now]. The first 55 minutes were pretty disappointing but the film had hints of the first film in the last half an hour which drastically improved. The main problem though was the amazing character of Shelley only getting about 5 minutes screen time this film. An OK film in the end but way down from it's precedeor [A to B-].

Edited January 27, 2014 by Mean girlsFilms

[Films]

Is anyone actually reading this apart from Baumer?

[baumer]

The problem with it right now is that there are three of you who want to do this all at once.  I think it works out better when only one is doing it at a time.  But keep it coming.  

[DAR]

I'm reading it now

[tawasal]

So am I. Keep going.

Edited January 27, 2014 by tawasal

[ChD]

I'm gonna stop right here. Diana above Oblivion.

 

Good luck completing your list, I guess.

[4815162342]

Sad you didn't like Oblivion more.And waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too low for Side Effects

[Hiccup]

R.I.P.D over the Conjuring

[Films]

I've just realised I forgot to include the internship on my list after I saw it so i'm moving everything down a place so far. New update in next 10 minutes

[Films]

Lets continue this countdown that's going to get more controversial

#47 A Good Day To Die Hard

Maybe I think this is better than most people as I have seen none of the other films in this series but I thought this was a quite good action flick with Bruce Willis giving a very good performance but the script was terrible and the plot was not great. I thought some of the action scenes were pretty good though and I did have a good time. I don't really remember much more about it.

#46 Hitchcock

Like Mandela: Long Walk To Freedom [not on this list as counts as 2014 movie for me], this film is another example of a programme I saw on TV for free then the film. I thought The Girl [the sienna miller one, if that's what it's called] was great and amazing so I really wanted to see this but this is probably the most average film. There is nothing great and nothing terrible. The performances were pretty good and I enjoyed most of the ending apart from that ridiculous first and last scene of the film I think. Johansson was very good as usual

#45 Parker

Now for the first of three films in a row that I did not see in the cinema, this was actually a pretty good action flick though Jennifer Lopez was pretty useless like the last half an hour of the film. The first half, especially the first 15 minutes were great and entertaining but it got worse by the second. Jason Statham gave a good performance though it's pretty identical to nearly every other role he has played. The set pieces were ok but the plot was over-stretched at times.

#44- Identity Thief

A film that had 3 identities, an absolutely fantastic start, a great and funny ending and an absolute SHIT middle. The first half an hour would probably get it near the top 15 films of the year if the rest of the film carried on like that. Very funny and Jason Bateman was great in this part of the film though he did get worse. The middle where it turned into a road trip comedy was pretty terrible but was better than the other attempt at a road trip comedy 2 weeks earlier here [the guilt trip]. There were few laughs in the middle but the last ten minutes were fantastic especially that final scene of Diana in prison. The one thing that was great the whole movie though was Melissa Mccarthy who I absolutely love. An amazing and funny actress. Shame the middle wasn't better as this had the potential to be an amazing film

#43- Alpha And Omega 2

Well bending the rules a bit as this did not get a cinema release and is only 50 minutes long but I was one of the few fans of the first film so when I found out about this, I watched it online ASAP. The first 10 minutes were not great and the animation was below average though the film got better in the middle before a really really abrupt ending though I am still looking forward to the 3rd one out in a couple of months. Still entertaining but not as good as the first.

#42- Thor: The Dark World

I didn't see the first film but this became a must see after the amazing Avengers but this film was ok and really average. Hemsworth and Portman were really good but those villians are possibly one of the worst movie villians I have ever witnessed. The plot was also terrible at points but LOKI was amazing and Tom Hiddleston gave another great performance in this role. The best part was the

Captain America cameo

.

#41- Jack The Giant Slayer

Hoult did great in the title role and most of the performances were pretty good but wow, those giants were ugly and the plot was a bit too over the top at times and went a bit of the rails at the end but it was good fun and I enjoyed it way more than I thought I was going too. It was also unintentionally funny at times but this film is really not memorable.

 

Thanks for reading this part. Top 40 will start soon [but not today]

Edited January 27, 2014 by Mean girlsFilms

[Films]

Lets Start This Top 40!!!!

40. ENDERS GAME

A film that I enjoyed a bit more than I was expecting with great performances from Asa Butterfield and one of my favourite actresses at the moment, Hailee Steinfeld. Viola Davis was also pretty good but in the minority I thought Ford and Kingsley were both bad and the weaklinks of the film. It started off ok but the middle was amazing but even though I know it is to build up for sequels, that twist was not great and the last scene was awful but the visual effects were really good