YourMother’s Fear IV Reviews: Pumpkin Spiced Fall Edition From The Crypt

[YM!]

We open in a desolate castle as we see a spooky coffin in the center, an undead human with a look similar to that of the Cryptkeeper but sporting glasses who lets out a cruel cackle.

 

Greeting Boos and Ghouls, it is I, YourMother (cue corny lighting strikes) to deliver my most dank and terrifying reviews yet. Let’s see if the writers are SCAREly trying at all. 

 

 

YourMother’s Fear IV Reviews: “Pumpkin Spiced” Fall Edition From the Crypt 

 

So the rules are pretty SINple (hope you tolerated that puns cause there’s a few GORE)

 

1.) You choose 2 films, 1 of your own (if you only have one film this year, it’ll automatically be on the roster, so you pick another film of someone else instead), and 1 from some else

2.) You must all have different films as I won’t read films twice.

3.) There’ll be three mystery films I’ll review too, first person to guess correctly wins a prize.

4.) I have compiled a list of films I want to review as well. These puppies are going first, and in no order here’s the list:

One Piece: The Journey Begins

Voltron: Reunion

Earthsong: Volume 1: Haven’s Guard

Jonny Jonny (long ass title) The Movie

The Odyssey: Homecoming 

Amulet II: The Last Council

Marked Up Time

Mass Effect

5.) I’ll also drop the rest of the films I’ve also read too at a later date.

 

I also known that I can’t start reviewing Y4 films yet but give reviews to things that have a sequel this year I didn’t read (ie Amulet, Extreme Dinosaurs, TTAFFBHv1) and other cool Y1 films:

 

My grading system is as follows and the memes will be posted later tonight.

0-1.9: 

2.0-2.9:

3.0-3.9:

4.0-4.9:

5.0-5.9:

6.0-6.9:

7.0-7.9

8.0-8.9:

9-10 

Edited October 1, 2018 by YourMother the Edgelord

[YM!]

Amulet

 

Animation is a very cool field in CAYOM as there’s a lot of excellent films that may not have done extraordinarily in today’s box office. Alpha Pictures’ Amulet is wonderfully crafted and possibly the best hand drawn animation in CAYOM. The cast excels, specifically Millie Bobby Brown as Emily, other stand outs are Sam Rockwell as Leon and Hugh Jackman as the delightfully uptight Cogsley. Travis Knight does excellent job directing and writing. The action in here is something to be seen, filled with such powerful energy. The film’s only problem is pacing problems, a good trim would’ve made it so much better. All in all it’s an excellent film, highly recommend it.

9.0/10.0 - A-

 

[cookie]

So I take it an A- still nets you an Expand Dong?

[Rorschach]

2 minutes ago, cookie said:

So I take it an A- still nets you an Expand Dong?

Well, A- would technically be like a 91 or a 92 on the Metacritic scale so yeah I guess it would.

[cookie]

5 minutes ago, Rorschach said:

Well, A- would technically be like a 91 or a 92 on the Metacritic scale so yeah I guess it would.

IIRC A- is 91 and A and above is 100.

[Rorschach]

Just now, cookie said:

IIRC A- is 91 and A and above is 100.

This is kinda why I chose to only do a numbers rating and not do letter grading. It's much easier imo.

[YM!]

40 minutes ago, cookie said:

So I take it an A- still nets you an Expand Dong?

Yeah. In my books anything over a 9.0/10.0 is an Expand Dong.

[YM!]

TTAFFBH

 

You know, if someone told me about this being a good movie, I’d be shocked since it’s basically discount Power Rangers but all in all, this movie is surprisingly good. At most times the humor lands however I found the sequel funnier than this one and sometimes can be a bit grating, the script is sharp, the characters who should by all means feel one dimensional are highly likeable and Gad/Snipes provide glorious villain cheese. The action in its self is very fun as well. This is a good movie but the sequel was way better.

 

7.5/10 - B

Edited September 25, 2018 by YourMother the Edgelord

[YM!]

Extreme Dinosaurs

 

This is basically a okay film. The Rock and Karl Urban does a great jobs as the film’s respective main protagonist and antagonist. The action can be fun and yes there’s a few moments that made me lack but this lacks the charm or originality or for the most part fun of some of Xillix’s other action comedy 80’s franchises based on mildly popular stuff to things you never knew existed (Street Sharks, He-Man, TTFABH.). It’s okay but it could’ve been something real fun. Hopefully the sequel is better.

5.6/10.0 - C

 

 

On a side note, here’s what’s next:

The SCP Foundation

Brandybrook 

Oscar Pill 

Reboot 

Best Friends Forever

Touching Spirit Bear

The Hunchback From Notre Dame

Flowers From Algernon

Edited September 26, 2018 by YourMother the Edgelord

[YM!]

Brandybrook

 

I am still an avid watcher of Family Guy (though I admit the current seasons have sucked), American Dad is still great and loved Ted. However Seth has done a lot of shitty projects, Million Ways to Die in The West, The Orville (don’t @ me), The Cleveland Show, and Bordertown. Sadly, Brandybrook is in the latter. It basically combines the worst of modern Family Guy and the haphazardly message it throws at you. The story and humor is atrocious, and the characters are so fucking one dimensional it hurts. It’s an eyesore, and I pity who winds up watching it. That being said, the dumpster fire has one or two redeeming qualities: decent animation and a decent song. But that only is not worth watching. 

 

1.5/10.0

 

 

[YM!]

@Spagheditary @Blankments I have no fear. I’ll review Jonny Jonny The Movie.

[YM!]

Requests are now open, you get 1 choice of a film of your own and 1 of someone else’s.

[Xillix]

Well my choice for another person's film is Lucid I suppose.

[YM!]

1 minute ago, Xillix said:

Well my choice for another person's film is Lucid I suppose.

Which other film do you want reviewed, you get 2.

[Xillix]

Just now, YourMother the Edgelord said:

Which other film do you want reviewed, you get 2.

I know but I don't wanna pick mine yet >.>

[Reddroast]

My request is animal crossing

[YM!]

1 hour ago, Reddroast said:

My request is animal crossing

Okay but you still have one more request left. One Piece was predetermined to be read.

[Reddroast]

My 2nd request is thundercats

[YM!]

Okay, so here’s the plan. I’m changing course to read everything from January to June. Reading the longest films first (Mass Effect, Odyssey, Earthsong, Pillars) obviously and then my other two most anticipated, One Piece and Marked Up Time. 

 

 

Everyone can still submit their requests if they want.

Edited October 1, 2018 by YourMother the Edgelord

[YM!]

Extrasensory 

Although far from unique, and special effects could be upped a notch, I found myself enjoying this quirky horror movie more often than not. I had fun.

6.1/10.0

 

 

The Mole

A well made whodunnit with energizing action sequences, a strong cast and fun plot. However for an action comedy, I didn’t find it too funny for an action comedy, not to mention it has some parts of convulsions.

5.8/10.0

 

Baseball Boy: Swing For The Fences

Although I found myself disliking, like really disliking Tobey McGuire’s character, it was nice seeing all 3 Spider-Men in a movie. It’s pretty much a run of the mill family film though.

5.3/10.0

 

When A Stranger Calls

I’ve never seen any of the “When A Stranger Calls”. However this is your typical throwaway horror movie. It’s inoffensive but at the same time of poor quality. I doubt this will leave any impressions. 

3.4/10.0