cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 Quote The neighbor explains that she went down to the scene and says that the shed was destroyed. She says she doesn’t believe the cops. Marty’s mother asks her what she thinks it was then. The neighbor says, “Something evil.” and leaves. This made me laugh harder than it should. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiccup23 Posted April 29, 2018 Share Posted April 29, 2018 The violence in Island of the Blue Dolphins is bloodless fyi. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 Okay is someone punking me with that "lover" scene? This is a horror movie, right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiccup23 Posted April 29, 2018 Share Posted April 29, 2018 3 minutes ago, cookie said: This made me laugh harder than it should. It is suppose to make you laugh. It is suppose to be over the top in that moment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiccup23 Posted April 29, 2018 Share Posted April 29, 2018 1 minute ago, cookie said: Okay is someone punking me with that "lover" scene? This is a horror movie, right? It is Stephen King. Blame him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiccup23 Posted April 29, 2018 Share Posted April 29, 2018 Also are you just reviewing my films? I have a gut feeling like it is gonna be a trash Hiccup session. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ezen Baklattan Posted April 29, 2018 Share Posted April 29, 2018 I think he’s going page by page - all these films are on page one, I think 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 Just now, Hiccup23 said: It is Stephen King. Blame him. Stephen King tried to make toilets scary. Doesn't change the fact that it's really silly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 Cycle of the Werewolf - Entertaining in a semi-cheesy way in spite of and sometimes because of the Stephen King silliness. Lieberher is pretty good here. B- Gentle Ben - C+ The Exorcism of Jessica Winters - An Exorcist wannabe whose one interesting angle is the love story C+ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 So I'm reading God of War and basically this happens: I approve. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YM! Posted April 29, 2018 Share Posted April 29, 2018 1 minute ago, cookie said: So I'm reading God of War and basically this happens: I approve. Which part? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 3 minutes ago, YourMother the Edgelord said: Which part? Ares murdering everyone. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 God of War - Snyder snyders into a snydering and it is (sometimes) glorious. Could've benefited from a much shorter runtime though. B- 51 - C Hope-Fear-Adventure - So apparently Jack went to the woods for a week and his parents just didn't give a shit. Oddly novel approach to a family film, I suppose. C+ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 Life of a Prophet - Is Muhammad depicted on screen? If he is... oh dear. C Redeeming Love - Already went over this in the discussion thread. F 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 Ice Station * phone rings * Hello, who is this? "It's me, stupid!" 2.0 me! Where are you even?! "I'm trying to drive past the Pharaoh's palace, but all these slaves are blocking the road singing about how their lord will "deliver them" or some shit like that. * car horn * Hey crybabies, get off the road!" ...Okay? Why did you call me? "I did the sequel to this one in 2.0 and it was horrible! Is the predecessor any better?" Not really. Just kind of a dumb Statham action movie. And then mutant elephant seals show up out of nowhere. "So it doesn't explain why in the sequel the President had the nuclear codes operated into him for no reason?" What? "Oh good, they're whipping the slaves off the road. Gotta go!" D+ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 29, 2018 Author Share Posted April 29, 2018 The Bronze Bow - Oh boy, a Guy Ritchie religious movie! ...Said no one ever. C+ Halloweentown - More of Benny pls B- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 30, 2018 Author Share Posted April 30, 2018 Oh crap, I completely forgot I had Silent Hill on the request docket. Sorry @Xillix, will get to it this morning. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 30, 2018 Author Share Posted April 30, 2018 Silent Hill: Innocence Lost Since we're reviewing a Silent Hill movie, we need the scariest music possible for this: Onto the review. I can see why this gets the praise that it does, I'm just not entirely on that level myself. It's mainly because it still falls into that video game fetch quest trapping a lot of other adaptations in CAYOM do, although not to the same degree as something like Bioshock. It makes it feel like the movie is stretching its heels a bit especially going into the third act, but when the god-thing shows up it's very suspenseful and well executed. The cast is good, not great. Theron is probably the best of the bunch mainly because she has the answers and is generally creepy and weird. I honestly found Laurie to be a bit all over the place, which I guess was the intent. Ackles serves as the reliable straight man and even if he himself isn't all that interesting it's really more about the sights and sounds than it is about any deep character exploration. Speaking of that, it's all very well executed technically. While there are their share of jumpscares, sometimes silly ones at that, the most effective elements are the atmosphere and the build up, as any good horror movie should have. Faithfulness to the source material has been a boon and a curse to many video game adaptations, here outside of the somewhat repetitive plotting it's mainly a boon. Minor note: I know he doesn't show up until the second game, but major missed opportunity in not bringing in Pyramid Head in some capacity. Everything can be improved with Pyramid Head. B+ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 30, 2018 Author Share Posted April 30, 2018 Bartimaeus and the Amulet of Samarkand It's a trainwreck of a movie but a very entertaining one at that so I can't dislike it. B- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookie Posted April 30, 2018 Author Share Posted April 30, 2018 Wolves of the Deep or Physics? What Physics? This is a Liam Neeson Movie, Shut Up B+ 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...