Cookie's Corner - Year 1

[cookie]

30 minutes ago, Xillix said:

Not every electronic device has wireless capability or an internet connection. Nowhere in the description does it say the AI can transfer itself to "any electronic device." The entire reason it's a big deal that a smartphone gets in is because it DOES have wireless capability and a web connection. Obviously their lab equipment doesn't. And this is a top secret government facility underground where, again, no devices that allow outside communication are allowed. How exactly is she going to order food?

 

Project Classified is a bad, dumb movie, and it's supposed to be, but your reviews seem to have a tendency to try and poke holes in everything and sometimes you kinda miss the point. Not an attack just a constructive criticism.  

She can't get people to do errands? There are ways to communicate without using electronic devices, I think if it's a government project they would be able to figure something out. I may have misread a bit about the internet connection but I do think my latter point still stands.

 

I admit I sometimes poke too many holes but I can assure it's mainly for humor's sake, usually when I don't think I have enough else to say to make up a full paragraph.

Edited September 26, 2017 by cookie

[Xillix]

True enough about the fact they'd need to have food coming in somehow, hehe. In my head honestly the justification was that Linda Hamilton was so dedicated/crazy she was more willing to starve everyone to contain the alien than risk someone slipping out during a delivery.

[cookie]

Hidden World

 

Okay... back up a little.

 

So the movie starts off by almost immediately throwing the main character into this fantastical world. I usually have no problem with movies wanting to keep a brisk pace, but this is a bit ridiculous. Part of why Spark: Rising's first half is so great is that it gave us enough time to get to know the protagonist, and when she's thrown into this dangerous new world we keep learning more about her. Hidden World forgoes much of this and we're left with Peter Parker not having much of a personality.

 

The ironic part is that once that's over and done with the movie falls into a really sluggish pace, not helped by the fact that the movie is almost 2 and a half hours long and for the fairly thin story it provides that leads to a lot of drawn out and honestly a bit boring scenes, despite Snyder's attempts to liven things up through visual spectacle. And that's not to say there aren't a lot of visual spectacle to be had, just maybe not as much in the way that'll instantly excite people. I think the main problem is that there's no real big action scene until near the end of the second act where Frank disposes the evil dictator.

 

Truth be told the movie does do a fairly clever subversion where Frank is basically turned into the warring dictator he sought to depose. It's a fairly clever commentary on much of modern politics and the dangers of violent revolution. I started to really enjoy the movie at that point until human sandpaper Brenton Thwaites showed back up and the movie kinda went downhill again. 

 

Despite the clever subversion, the thin story and punishing length distract from me giving it a good grade. And even with all the spectacle, much of the world wasn't very well defined. Some of the creature designs are kinda neat but the movie doesn't do all that much with the setting it has. After such a long stretch of nothing post-summer it's actually nice to see a big visual effects blockbuster on the big screen again, but it is a bit of a slog to get through.

 

C+

Edited September 26, 2017 by cookie

[Hiccup23]

FYI Hidden World is based off a book. A very short thinly plotted book that is. 

 

I'm gonna address this, I have a huge problem with modern fantasy/sci-fi films that feel like they need to have action scenes constantly. This is my biggest pet peeve with modern cinema. RWR got the same criticism as Hidden World for not having enough action despite being visually beautiful. That isn't my style. Both film's weren't suppose to feature heavy action sequences constantly throughout the film. They are visually stunning and slow brewing films that lead to a finale. The films are slow because they allow you to soak in all the visuals and world building. I thought I defined the world pretty well. I could write a 20,000 word film like I originally had with Hidden World but 75% of it was describing the world not actual action/story sequences. I give you enough to build an image of the world but ultimately I want you to allow your imagination to run. 

 

RWR is a slow paced visually detailed. True it doesn't have a ton of action but is much rather a sci-fi fi drama rather than an action film.

 

HW is a neo-noir sci-fi film that brings an original story to the big screen and like RWR is a slow moving visually detailed film rather than an action sequence upon action sequence film. It was never intended to be a Transformers.

 

Edited September 26, 2017 by Hiccup23

[cookie]

Amulet is coming tomorrow because it's super long so I'm just going to drop a few quickies for now.

 

Pandemic

 

A Contagion clone (and I didn't even like Contagion all that much) that bizarrely stops without an ending. We find out Micheal has been infected by the flu and... that's it. It just ends. At first I thought the projector broke down or a reel was missing (even though most movies don't project using film reels anymore) but that was really it. Bit of a bummer.

 

C

 

 

Cold as the Void

 

You had me, movie. You almost had me. It really looked like you were going to go for a ballsy ending where everyone gets to go home happily ever after. I can't believe I'm calling that ballsy, but do you know how rare that is in a CAYOM horror movie? But you couldn't help yourself. You just HAD to do the "ZOMG THEY'RE ALL DEAD" twist at the end as if we haven't seen that enough already. You even had something clever going by connecting the ghost to the woman's increasingly disturbing dreams, but you kinda screwed the pooch on that too. For shame.

 

C

[cookie]

59 minutes ago, Hiccup23 said:

FYI Hidden World is based off a book. A very short thinly plotted book that is. 

 

I'm gonna address this, I have a huge problem with modern fantasy/sci-fi films that feel like they need to have action scenes constantly. This is my biggest pet peeve with modern cinema. RWR got the same criticism as Hidden World for not having enough action despite being visually beautiful. That isn't my style. Both film's weren't suppose to feature heavy action sequences constantly throughout the film. They are visually stunning and slow brewing films that lead to a finale. The films are slow because they allow you to soak in all the visuals and world building.

 

RWR is a slow paced visually detailed. True it doesn't have a ton of action but is much rather a sci-fi fi drama rather than an action film.

 

HW is a neo-noir sci-fi film that brings an original story to the big screen and like RWR is a slow moving visually detailed film rather than an action sequence upon action sequence film. It was never intended to be a Transformers.

 

I think the problem with that is that if it is supposed to be a neo-noir the end of the second act throws that away entirely since after that it's about politics between warring nations and one big action scene after another following that. I didn't even really get a neo-noir vibe even before that but at the time reading it I didn't know it was based on a book to be fair. I made the action complaint mainly because the story and characters were pretty thin and once you couple that with the runtime that means in practice there's long stretches of the film where very little happens. I think you miscalculated how many minutes you really needed to do the stuff you wanted to get across.

 

I also think if you really wanted me to soak in the world-building there needed to be a lot more of it. I'm using my imagination based on what I'm given. If I'm given little to nothing, my mind is not going to conjure up anything all that interesting.

 

I'm guessing the complaint about Rama was what others said in general since I never made the complaint myself.

Edited September 26, 2017 by cookie

[cookie]

Okay so Amulet is going to have to wait a bit because of its length. I looked ahead and most of the remaining films of the year are far shorter so I'm going through those first and then come back to Amulet. Sorry @Alpha

 

 

The Truth about the Harry Quebert Affair

 

It's unfortunately spurred with a lot of contrivances that stretch your suspension of disbelief (you'd think that if Nola's mother died in a house fire started by Nola four years before her disappearance that information would've come up much earlier than it did. Kinda massive blunder on Marcus's part for not doing any fact checking before he published his book) and the 2008 setting with the presidential election in the background doesn't seem to have much purpose - I presume the book wove this in a lot better but the movie could have taken place in the present and you wouldn't have missed much - but it's a decent investigation drama nonetheless. The strong performances from the cast and the initial intrigue help elevate things, plus the usual touches by producer David Fincher and director Asif Kapadia does make it a gorgeous movie to look at. Maybe it didn't need to be 143 minutes long but the pacing never felt slow enough that it became distracting. It's unlikely to be any kind of Oscar frontrunner but if you're looking for some decent yarn and can ignore some of the contrivances it's a good option for older audiences in between the bigger holiday releases.

 

B

 

 

Extreme Dinosaurs

 

I make it no secret that I despise the director attached to this. Anyone who knows me knows that I often dub Ninja Turtles and Battle L:A director Jonathan Liebesman "shitsman", mainly because his movies makes Micheal Bay's offerings look like quality material (even if Pearl Harbor and Age of Extinction are ultimately more painful to sit through than most of Liebesman's catalogue) and I tend to walk into any Liebesman film with a highly negative outlook.

 

However, in the interest of fairness I will put my detest of the director aside and judge this film on its own merits, so here we go:

 

It's... okay. If I were to list all the stupid stuff we'd be here all week (just one example: the villains' ultimate plan is to blow up the Amazons with a single jet to accelerate global warming. That's probably gonna take a while to execute, guys) but your eight-year old is probably gonna have a blast watching intelligent dinosaurs go head to head with one another in some pretty decently made action sequences. It's not going to hold any adult's attention for long (save for an amusing turn by Danny Trejo) but the film's short run time also means they probably won't have to either.

 

C+

Edited September 27, 2017 by cookie

[Xillix]

1 hour ago, cookie said:

Extreme Dinosaurs

 

I make it no secret that I despise the director attached to this. Anyone who knows me knows that I often dub Ninja Turtles and Battle L:A director Jonathan Liebesman "shitsman", mainly because his movies makes Micheal Bay's offerings look like quality material (even if Pearl Harbor and Age of Extinction are ultimately more painful to sit through than most of Liebesman's catalogue) and I tend to walk into any Liebesman film with a highly negative outlook.

 

However, in the interest of fairness I will put my detest of the director aside and judge this film on its own merits, so here we go:

 

It's... okay. If I were to list all the stupid stuff we'd be here all week (just one example: the villains' ultimate plan is to blow up the Amazons with a single jet to accelerate global warming. That's probably gonna take a while to execute, guys) but your eight-year old is probably gonna have a blast watching intelligent dinosaurs go head to head with one another in some pretty decently made action sequences. It's not going to hold any adult's attention for long (save for an amusing turn by Danny Trejo) but the film's short run time also means they probably won't have to either.

 

C+

The raptors not really knowing what they're doing is kind of a running theme in the show, heh. Once they spent an entire episode trying to make a huge volcano erupt before someone pointed out the ashen "cloud cover" would actually make the world COOLER.

[cookie]

Faces & Voices: The True Story of Milli Vanilli

 

While it at times feels like a Wikipedia retelling of the story of Milli Vanilli, F. Gary Gray has done a great job translating the story into cinematic form, even if it doesn't reach the heights of Straight Outta Compton. The two unknown lookalikes as the leads actually do a pretty good job, and the movie does a very smart thing in highlighting the fact that they come from impoverished environments and would be just the kind of people a greedy record producer like Christoph Waltz's character would deceive and exploit, even if it doesn't lead to the movie making any kind of powerful statement like Straight Outta Compton did.

 

If there's one thing I feel lacking is that the epilogue is very abrupt. It ends on Rob's suicide, not acknowledging Fab's post-Milli career and later comeback which in my opinion would have been a more fitting ending. As it is it just kinda ends on a downer. It's still a strong movie overall even if the ending does kinda leave you with a minor gripe in the back of your mind.

 

A-/B+

 

 

ReBoot

 

I gotta give Megabyte credit, for such an obvious evildoer he is very humble and honest about what he does. It's kinda refreshing and funny in a way.

 

This is a pretty good animated adventure. It's not on the level of say Me and My Shadow or The Adventures of Scrooge McDuck, but it's pretty good nonetheless. The fact that the movie doesn't cheapen out and gives a much needed visual update to the series is welcomed (I mean have you seen the show lately? I'm sure the writing was good but geez that horribly dated animation) and most of the characters while not particularly deep are likable enough as is. The only character that kinda falls flat for me is Bob, he's just kind of bland and a bit too much of a doofus for my taste, even if he does do some very smart things near the end of the film. The message seems to be sort of a mixture of the two How to Train Your Dragon movies - not a surprise given DeBlois directing - in that you should be open-minded and kind but at the same time understand that it won't work in every situation and not every troubling individual you meet is just a misunderstood outsider needing a bit of compassion and rehabilitation. That's a very good message to tell kids actually, and cleverness like that will do well enough with adults too. If you're looking for wholesome family fun this holiday and The Hunchback of Notre Dame proves to be too dark for you, I'd say give this one a watch.

 

B+

Edited September 27, 2017 by cookie

[cookie]

When Winter Comes

 

So the movie starts off with an interesting premise (the divorced father appears at the house on a short notice and the girls quickly discover that something's wrong with him) but then... fucking ghosts. I must apologize to the peers sitting beside me for me letting out a loud "OH COME ON!!!" as soon as the ghosts appeared. Why can't a psychological horror just be, you know, psychological? Haven't we had enough of the supernatural this year already? Anyway so this leads into a climax that's almost a direct ripoff of The Shining and it just ends with no real insight into anything. Can't we just do a New Year's resolution where all studios responsible promise to cut down significantly on horror movies involving slashers, ghosts or demons? It's getting out of hand.

 

C

 

 

Touching Spirit Bear

 

1. So it was either spend a year on an island thousands of miles away in the freezing cold or a correctional facility for the same amount of time. I'm sorry, what was supposed to be the better option here?
2. Wait, Cole kept swimming in freezing water against the tide until nighttime? Does he have superhuman abilities or something?
3. I'll be honest, Cole's been such a massive asshole up to this point to everything and everyone that a white bear #rekting him hard is pretty satisfying to see.
4. So he lies bleeding with a broken chest for several hours in freezing temperatures with seagulls fighting over his flesh, but he seems to surviving all of that for days. Again, superhuman abilities?
5. And then lightning strikes a tree right next to him. I'm sorry, why isn't this kid dead by this point?
6. I guess you have to eat something to stay alive, but that poor mouse...
7. AAAAND now Cole's eating his own puke. Is the point of this movie just to gross you out? 
8. We're on our fourth flashback and Cole has yet to receive any redeeming qualities about him. In fact the more it goes on, the worse he gets.
9. So now Cole is found and brought home to be healed. Honestly given how much shit he's survived I just assumed he was Wolverine Jr. at this point.
10. So in the film's last twenty minutes we FINALLY see Cole trying to learn a thing or two and become a better person. I'm sorry, why doesn't this take up the majority of the film instead of being extremely rushed at the end?
11. The parents are damn right not to let Peter go anywhere near Cole. Cole can claim he's changed his ways all he wants but until he proves it I wouldn't let the kid he practically damaged for life anywhere near him. And Peter is damn right to exact his vengeance on him later.
12. What was the deal with the bear? Did it try to teach Cole anything? It just kinda showed up, beat the snot out of Cole and appeared in random interludes afterwards doing basically jack shit.

 

I'm sorry, I get the basic idea is that Cole is supposed to see the error of his ways, but so much of the movie was basically The Revenant lite if Leo was an unrepentant asshole. The flashbacks do nothing to make us understand Cole other than the fact that his dad beat him as a kid, but you can't tell me that's the only reason he's so horrible to everyone. The only things I ended up liking in the movie were some of Van Sant's cinematography and the scene where the bear beats the shit out the main character, but other than that? This is just... what the hell did I even watch?

 

D+

 

 

Amulet coming next. Then, the worst of the year, the awards and the top 25!

 

Edited October 25, 2017 by cookie

[Alpha]

[cookie]

12 minutes ago, Alpha said:

 

 

Please don't make Scrooge McDuck and Voltron underperform

[Rorschach]

Edited September 28, 2017 by Rorschach

[cookie]

And at long last, the final review of Y1:

 

Amulet

 

Travis Knight was probably the best possible choice for this. It's a fantasy-heavy adventure with colorful characters, a strange but involving setting and the even stranger creatures that inhabit it. The stark animation helps give everything life with some exciting action sequences involving planes, sky monsters, city chases, magic energy being handed out like cotton candy, a climactic battle between a robot house and a giant elf on the side of a cliff etc. It's a movie that seems to have a little bit of everything.

 

I do wish it didn't move at such a breakneck speed through all of it though.

 

In one fashion or another the movie is always moving. If isn't moving, it's only to explain something, and you're kinda left wishing for quieter moments that let you soak in the atmosphere and provide character development. That's not to say moments like that don't exist, but they're few and far between, and by the end I was left kinda exhausted over the whole thing. That doesn't make the end product bad on any level, but I think some younger viewers are going to find themselves restless by the film's conclusion.

 

I've never read the source material (I did google the character names just to get an idea of what they look like) so I can't make any calls of judgement on if it's true to it, but I was able to follow the story just fine enough and I think the general audience are going to enjoy it too just fine. Amulet is clearly setting itself up for future sequels, which I do hope find a way to balance the pacing which in my opinion is what keeps the film from truly blossoming to its full potential. But it's a good start if nothing else.

 

B+/B

 

Edited September 28, 2017 by cookie

[cookie]

Tomorrow we'll be counting down the top 25 and handing out the awards, but for now I want to look in the opposite direction. The bad ones. The worst of the worst. The terrible 10. The something bad somethings.

 

These are Cookie's Corner's worst films of Year 1:

 

The Dishonorable Mentions:

 

 

Chrono Trigger  ( @Electric ) - How do you squash such worthwhile material? Don't cut out a single thing yet still force the film into a two-hour running time. The end result is as follows.

Runaway: A Road Adventure ( @Bastien ) - Barely even trying to be funny, wastes several great comedic talents both in front and behind the camera, and completely loses its track halfway through. This series died on the first try and it's not hard to see why.

Seduction ( @Hiccup23 ) - I've made it clear that I don't like Eli Roth. This does nothing to change that.
 

 

 

And now, the top 10:
 

Spoiler

 

10. Ninja 3D ( @Hiccup23 )

 

I think it's been repeated enough about the film's huge blunder regarding the use of ninjas in Imperial China despite ninjas being of Japanese origin. What hasn't been repeated enough is that it's a really boring film on top of that. Cheaply made and with nobody to root for (we don't even understand why they're fighting) there's no reason for anyone to see Ninja 3D unless you're into milquetoast martial arts films.

Spoiler

 

9. River of Death ( @Hiccup23 )

 

An outrageously overlong murder mystery with a ludicrously silly supernatural element introduced halfway through. It really is a morbid version of a bad cartoon episode.

Spoiler

 

8. Battle: Mars ( @Hiccup23 )

 

CAYOM's answer to equally terrible animated films like Delgo and Battle for Terra. Bland story, bland characters, ugly animation and an even uglier air of cynicism surrounding the film's conception. It's made by people who think audiences will lap up anything. Going by the box office, they were fortunately proven wrong.

Spoiler

 

7. The Trail ( @Xillix )

 

In a year already overstuffed with disposable horror films, this stands out as more disposable than most. The killer is never given any rhyme or reason for his actions, and his targets are even less defined. It's place is the bottom of the bargain bin, not in theaters annexing screens from much better films.

Spoiler

 

6. Dangerous Beauty ( @Bastien )

 

To this day I'm still not really sure what happened in this movie. It's kinda hard for a trashy teen slasher movie to leave you with more questions than answers, so this managing to do that is an achievement in of itself.

Spoiler

 

5. Don't Go Outside ( @Xillix )

 

We're only halfway through the list and we're already at our fourth horror movie. A found-footage Evil Dead-knockoff that can't even do any Evil Dead stuff due to the film castrating itself with a PG-13 rating. Even at just 83 minutes it's 80 minutes too long.

Spoiler

 

4. The Devil's Hitman ( @Xillix )

 

Uwe Boll at his usual terrible combined with a bored Nicholas Cage whose character has one of the dumbest names of the year? I would've asked "what could possibly go wrong?" but the real question should be "what could possibly go right?"

Spoiler

 

3. The Haunting in Wisconsin ( @Hiccup23 )

 

A baffling and infuriating enterprise from beginning to end. Sam Raimi should be ashamed for even glancing at the script, but he leapt into the pool of feces head first and the stench will follow him for a long time.

Spoiler

 

2. The Ultimate Prank ( @Xillix )

 

Looking back, I'm honestly not sure why I gave it a D-. A D- implies there's even one redeeming element to it. There isn't one. At all. The Ultimate Prank clearly hates our future generation, director Miguel Arteta clearly thinks that children will just sit and accept the most mean-spirited premise possible because hey, it's for kids, right? Why hold ourselves to any standards of decency? Any audience member, young or old, should feel unclean walking out of it. If you see your kid watching this film, don't be mad at them, talk to them and make them understand why it is wrong. And then promptly burn the DVD.

Spoiler

 

1. Brandybrook ( @Hiccup23 )

 

What's worse than a film that clearly hates children? How about a movie that clearly despises the human race.

 

Brandybrook is the only movie I've ever walked out of halfway through. It's a movie that throws every racist, sexist, ableist, homophobic and offensive joke at you because it's under the false impression that being edgy makes you funny. Even the one potentially redeeming element it might've had is squandered spectacularly and made even more offensive than what it looked like from the outset. You have to try to be that bad.

 

What makes it even worse is that it's made by a person I know can be funny, even if he's spent the last few years trying his damnedest to convince me otherwise. It has a cast of people I know can be funny. And if you know how to be funny, why do you go make insulting garbage like this? Really, this shit should've been below them.

 

I'm willing to call Brandybrook downright hateful. It hates the disadvantaged people it's so gleefully mocking. It hates the mere concept of good comedy. And most of all it hates its audience, because it thinks they will just lap it up like the idiots that they think they are. If there's any justice in this world, they are hopefully proven wrong.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited September 28, 2017 by cookie

[Xillix]

Damn! ALMOST!

[Alpha]

Phew.

 

EDIT: Forgot to say this but thanks for good Amulet review, Cook.

Edited September 28, 2017 by Alpha

[Hiccup23]

5 out of the 10....damn

[cookie]

It's awards time!

 

I'm going to spread these out over the top 25 but I thought of handing out a few of them before we begin the countdown.

 

If you need a refresher on any of the awards I'll be handing out, here's a link:

 

 

The Scrooge McDuck Award for Stingiest Studio

 

And the winner is...

 

 

 

MV PICTURES

 

MV Pictures has made a name for itself this year with 80s/90s cartoon adaptations and bargain bin horror movies. Sometimes a decent film emerges out of their catalogue (BraveStarr is probably the best of the bunch) and sometimes they do spend the necessary amount (Go Go GoBots) but many of their films - their cartoon adaptations in particular - end up sharing the same problem. While not the cheapest in the world, they rarely spend enough so that the film can have the spectacle it clearly wants to have, and rushed effects and action scenes are to follow. Swat Kats, Captain Planet and Dino-Riders are just a few examples.

 

I would say good on them for keeping their costs down, but apparently this hasn't been enough to save the studio, as it is set to fold within the year and any property that turns out successful will probably end up in the hands of Gold Crescent Pictures and its associates. In case the executives at MV Pictures need any financial aid, Cookie Pictures is willing to lend a helping hand...

 


 

 

Edited September 28, 2017 by cookie

[cookie]

Surprise award!

 

 

The Donald Duck Award for Most Anger-inducing Tangent

 

Yeah I know Donald Duck himself wasn't in any of the movies I made this year but The Adventures of Scrooge McDuck got made so that's close enough. If you've read through the 86 reviews I've posted this year you might have noticed that I tend to go off on a tangent when it comes to one thing or another. The impact of me yelling may not be felt through the writing, but be assured that emotions rang high after the film had concluded. Some of the entries on this list are from films I don't think are particularly bad overall or may even lean on the side of good, but the shortcomings they had were aggravating enough nonetheless.

 

A caveat: none of the nominees here are from my worst list. If I had included them it'd just be me yelling about the ending to The Haunting of Wisconsin or the entirety of Brandybrook, and I think I've subjected you to enough of that already.

 

The nominees are:

 

 

 

From Seeing Her by @spaghetti!

 

 

 

 

Quote

...Oliver's parents are real assholes. Who the hell says "you'll find some other girl" right after said girl's funeral?! You can do that when your kid goes through a breakup, not when the love of his life dies in a brutal car accident. And it doesn't stop there. The mother even rolls her fucking eyes when Oliver says nobody can replace Gwen. Bitch, your kid is grieving, lay off with the attitude.

 

 

From Apocamance by @Ethan Hunt

 

 

 

 

Quote

...as soon as Anna Kendrick shows up, hoo boy. The second half is weirdly misogynist and altogether baffling in how it manages to spiral out of control in such a spectacular fashion. JGL and Kendrick become super unlikable super fast and Slate goes cuckoo for cocoa puffs so you can't even sympathize with her by the end.

 

 

From Mile High by @Hiccup23

 

 

 

 

Quote

It's a fairly predictable romantic comedy until suddenly TERRORISTS!!! No seriously, the last act goes completely bonkers and I don't see how the creators thought this would be funny in the current environment. And how the hell are Ryan and Molly drifting apart when they work on the same plane?!

 

 

From Public Eye by @Hiccup23

 

 

 

 

Quote

In most of the movie [the protesters are] just "the other" swarming and attacking Pete while he's out patrolling. Plus the movie goes really softball on condemning the police and instead puts most of it on Pete's racist partner as if events like Ferguson are just the result of "bad apples" and not of the fact that America's police system is woefully broken. I really don't want to accuse any of the people making this film of ulterior motives especially since the intent going in isn't a bad one but that really makes me tilt my head.

 

 

From Life is Strange by @ChD

 

 

 

 

Quote

WHY IS NOBODY CALLING THE POLICE?!

 

 

From Cold as the Void by @Xillix

 

 

 

 

Quote

It really looked like you were going to go for a ballsy ending where everyone gets to go home happily ever after. I can't believe I'm calling that ballsy, but do you know how rare that is in a CAYOM horror movie? But you couldn't help yourself. You just HAD to do the "ZOMG THEY'RE ALL DEAD" twist at the end as if we haven't seen that enough already.

 

 

From When Winter Comes by @Xillix

 

 

 

 

Quote

...but then... fucking ghosts. I must apologize to the peers sitting beside me for me letting out a loud "OH COME ON!!!" as soon as the ghosts appeared. Why can't a psychological horror just be, you know, psychological? Haven't we had enough of the supernatural this year already?

 

 

From Touching Spirit Bear by @Alpha

 

 

 

 

Quote

The parents are damn right not to let Peter go anywhere near Cole. Cole can claim he's changed his ways all he wants but until he proves it I wouldn't let the kid he practically damaged for life anywhere near him. And Peter is damn right to exact his vengeance on him later.

 

 
 

 

 

 

And the winner is:

 

 

 

"WHY IS NOBODY CALLING THE POLICE?!"

From Life is Strange

 

It was toss-up between this and the rant from Touching Spirit Bear. I think what pushed this over the edge was the ending. Max knows who killed Chloe and Rachel, but we never see her do anything about it when she returns to the restored timeline. Again, the game probably made more sense of this (as @ChD helpfully pointed out) but in the movie, it doesn't.

 

And if y'all think I've been a bit mean this year, I have only one thing to say:

 

I'll be a very good boy next year I promise please don't be mean to my movies

 

 

Edited September 28, 2017 by cookie