Y4 - The Academy Awards (Odyssey 3 takes gold with 9 awards including Best Picture, Fortnight in Silver with Ensemble and Actor, Spark 3 in Bronze with VFX and Cinematography nods)

[cookie]

Wait, how many ballots were submitted? Eleven?

[Blankments]

SIR THYMES TIME IS A LOSER

 

(but it's ok)

[Alpha]

Amulet III is coming for that Best Animated Feature Oscar in Year 6...

[Rorschach]

2 minutes ago, YourMother the Edgelord said:

Wrong studio but thanks everyone.

Fixed it

[Rorschach]

@Spagspiria Check your PM

[Xillix]

lol that 17 points

[Rorschach]

Commercial Break #6:

HOURGLASS ANIMATION

 

*Uplifting music begins to play. It is softly orchestral*

*Several alien students in a grand hall begin to chatter as Cassie (Sophia Lillis) walks by*

 

Cassie (v.o.): I don't know if I can tell them.

 

*She waits for a ship from Marion (Charlie Day), the bounty hamster, as she explains her plight. Later, They look at the stars on their ship at night.*

 

Marion: No matter what happens, you're still my friend.

Cassie: But what if no one else can like me for who I am?

 

*Cassie hugs her parents, George (Jason Sudekis) and Vivian (Leslie Mann) in her foyer of their home.*

George: You've always known exactly what you wanted, but maybe you don't?

Cassie: Of course I do! Life couldn't be better for me.

Vivian: You don't have to pretend around me, sweetheart. Please be honest with us.

 

Narrator: A teenager at a crossroads...

 

*Cassie pushes Marion away as she runs across a School Hallway.*

Cassie: I can't focus on my old life now. I have a career. I found someone I love. They....they just don't know it.

Marion: But we're still friends, hunters for life?

Cassie: I don't know anymore.

 

Narrator: A hamster without stability

 

*Marion is at a bar with fellow bounty hunters Captain Fab (Ice Cube), Moxie (Kate McKinnon), and Gravitas (Chris Redd)*

Captain Fab: Just because she's trying to take a lot on doesn't mean she doesn't care about you.

Marion: But she loves someone else.

Moxie: In a romantic way. I promise you she doesn't have those kind of feelings about you.

Gravitas: That would be pretty weird.

 

*The music gets more dramatic* (1:57 to end)

 

Narrator: But when love across the galaxy is threatened...

 

Newscaster: This is an atrocity. Everyone just attacked each other.

*We see a cartoonish mob of people, still oscar-baityness played straight*

*Flithbert,  (Ryan Gosling) a short, stumpy alien, begins to cackle. He speaks in a shriveled, awkward voice.*

Flithbert: Now everyone will know exactly how I felt!

*George and Vivian embrace in their house, holding back tears.*

 

Narrator: And society is at risk...

 

*We walk through a large office full of futuristic computers. A slightly reptilian woman, Zsa Zsa (Rose Byrne) walks through as she speaks over voiceover*

Zsa Zsa: Let's be honest. Deep down, you know you're nothing. *She speaks to Marion, who begins to frown out of sadness.*

*Marion and Cassie are fighting.*

Marion: I can't let you walk away from me!

Cassie: I didn't want it to be this way!

*Marion freaks out inside a car, destroying everything in his apartment in an over the top manner*

 

Narrator: ...There must be hope.

 

(8:03, skipping around about)

(1:01) NEXT SUMMER

 

*We see a beautiful meadow as Cassie stands in it, contemplating on life.*

*Marion looks at a grave for a seemingly random person*

 

Narrator: From the studio that brought you SEEING HER and NOTES FROM THE OTHERSPACE.

 

*Moxie looks on in tears as the high school (human) football team she coaches is about to win the big game. She whispers in French: "Thank the heavens."*

*Lulela (Yara Shahidi), an alien with porcupine-esque features, looks at a prison wall as she cries holding her hand against the glass of the visitation room's wall, her hand seemingly touching a random stranger.*

 

Narrator: Comes the most human story of Y5.

 

*Cassie, somehow inexplicably, is suddenly a lawyer in a court room, as she gives a rousing speech.*

Cassie: We are all a part of something bigger, something full of hope,

*We see Captain Fab write an equation on a board as an elderly janitor, Mordecai (Jeff Bennet, again playing a random character), smiles.*

and we must be there for one another, no matter who we are,

*Gravitas puts on a wig and lipstick, shot in an artsy manner.*

no matter who we love, who we pray to, the color of our skin.

*George and Vivian run around a city scape in an artsy, romantic manner.

We all!

*Smacks hands on table*

Deserve!

*Smacks hands on table*

Love!

 

(9:37 to end)

 

Academy Award Nominee SOPHIA LILLIS

*She is an aspiring actress, standing at the stage.*

Academy Award Winner CHARLIE DAY

*He watches fireworks, feeling terminally ill and hooked up to an IV.*

Academy Award Winner ICE CUBE

*He is dressed in 1940s getup, watching a train pass by.*

Academy Award Nominee KATE MCKINNON

*She sits covered in old age makeup, reflecting a past love.*

Emmy Winner CHRIS REDD

*He looks on as police arrest him, crying the process.*

Academy Award Nominee RYAN GOSLING

*He stands in a forest, looking up at the sky.*

Academy Award Nominee ROSE BYRNE

*She holds a child in her arms, which is clearly a baby doll.*

Screen Actors Guild Nominee YARA SHAHIDI

*She wears sad clown makeup and sheds a tear.*

BAFTA Nominee MICHELLE YEOH

*She looks into a shattered mirror, reflecting on her divided state.*

with Critics Choice Award Nominee LESLIE MANN

*She finds herself in the trenches of a war.*

and Kids Choice Award Nominee JASON SUDEKIS

*He stands up to rally a crowd at an anti-racism rally.*

 

*Back on the ship at night, Cassie and Marion hug each other once again.*

Cassie: Maybe the root problem is...we're just two lonely bounty hunters.

 

TWO LONELY BOUNTY HUNTERS

 

*voiceover*

Cassie: Wait...almost none of this actually happens in the final movie.

Marion: Well we gotta start the campaign early, don't we?

Cassie: Do you know how easily space operas get nominated nowadays? Spark 2 got in for god's sake!

 

SCREENERS COMING TO AN ACADEMY MEMBER NEAR YOU

[Rorschach]

8 minutes ago, cookie said:

Wait, how many ballots were submitted? Eleven?

ye

[Ezen Baklattan]

The TLBH trailer was inspired by this:

 

 

[YM!]

Yep, 2LBH is my most anticipated Y5 film.

[Rorschach]

*“Never Fade Away” from Spark: Beyond the Sky is played

 

"Please welcome to the stage this year’s Academy Award nominee for Best Actor, star of The Square Mile, Spark: Beyond the Sky, and the upcoming Countdown to Extinction, Chiwetel Ejiofor!"

 

Ejiofor: They told me they wanted a british actor to present the nominees and winner for Documentary Feature, the most important award of all!

*a collective silence from the audience

Ejiofor: Well, when the nominees are all the equivalent of feature length National Geographic and PBS specials, it's really hard to gauge excitement, huh. Welp, here are the nominees for Best Documentary Feature:

 

Spoiler

 Bats

 

Spoiler

The Guardian of the West

 

Spoiler

Safari Trail

 

Ejiofor: And the participation trophy goes to…

 

Spoiler

The Guardian of the West

 

Winners: Hey, PBS is a great network! They put great effort into their documentaries!

Ejiofor: True but they don’t just spend ten minutes making a wikipedia summary, now do they?

Winners: 😐

 

Spoiler

(12) Bats 

(28) The Guardian of the West

(20) Safari Trail 

 

 

Edited December 10, 2018 by Rorschach

[cookie]

Just now, YourMother the Edgelord said:

Yep, 2LBH is my most anticipated Y5 film.

[YM!]

4 minutes ago, cookie said:

I’m sorry but Pasta found the perfect way to pander to me, a sequel to arguably one of the best animated films on CAYOM and hopefully enough shipping material to choke out a fanfic writer to make me one happy man

Edited December 10, 2018 by YourMother the Edgelord

[cookie]

1 minute ago, YourMother the Edgelord said:

I’m sorry but Pasta found the perfect way to pander to me, a sequel to arguably one of the best animated films on CAYOM and hopefully enough shipping material to choke out a fanfic writer to make me one happy man

You want shipping? 

 

Spoiler

Oh, you will get shipping 

 

[Blankments]

3 minutes ago, YourMother the Edgelord said:

I’m sorry but Pasta found the perfect way to pander to me, a sequel to arguably one of the best animated films on CAYOM and hopefully enough shipping material to choke out a fanfic writer to make me one happy man

you want shipping? Rapsittie Street Kids is coming your way

[Ezen Baklattan]

The book that's about to inspire every Space Opera in CAYOM:

 

[YM!]

1 minute ago, cookie said:

You want shipping? 

 

  Hide contents

Oh, you will get shipping 

 

This pleases me. Go on.

[Rorschach]

Please welcome the presenters of our next category, Best Original Score: the second Venchell, Taron Egerton, and another Academy Award nominee for Best Actor tonight, Charlie Heaton, star of Tulpa and Spark: Beyond the Sky

 

Egerton: I guess that’s all people are gonna remember me for from here on out.

Heaton: Who cares?! The second film was nominated for Best Picture! The haters can cry in their sleep over it!

Egerton: Yeah but we pulled a Godfather 3.

Heaton: Not this year we haven’t!

Egerton: Can’t wait for Jackman to win over you.

Heaton: Hey!

Egerton: Anyways, we have an award to present. This category recognizes the achievements of the composers who create half the emotions you experience watching a film.

Heaton: Thomas Newman did that for our film!

Egerton: Well I guess he didn’t try hard enough

Heaton: 😤

Egerton: Here are the nominees for Best Original Score:

 

Spoiler

 

Pillars of Eternity: The Hollow Vale - Music by Patrick Doyle

 

Spoiler

 

Mass Effect -  Music by Clint Mansell

 

Spoiler

 

The Odyssey: Homecoming - Music by Howard Shore

 

Spoiler

 

Fortnight - Music by John Williams

 

Spoiler

 

Silent Hill: Restless Dreams - Music by Akira Yamaoka

 

Heaton: And the Oscar goes to…

 

Spoiler

John Williams for Fortnight

 

Williams: Thank you so much for this award. It’s always such a pleasure to work with Steven but this film, more than any other, I was ready to jump on board and be apart of the second he told what it was about. Thank you Steven and thank you to the Academy.

 

Spoiler

(29) Patrick Doyle, Pillars of Eternity: The Hollow Vale

(28) Clint Mansell, Mass Effect

(32) Howard Shore, The Odyssey: Homecoming

(41) John Williams, Fortnight

(35) Akira Yamaoka, Silent Hill: Restless Dreams 

 

 

[Blankments]

Just now, Spagspiria said:

The book that's about to inspire every Space Opera in CAYOM:

 

there are no lesbians in Space Musical

 

only gay parents

[SLAM!]

4 minutes ago, YourMother the Edgelord said:

I’m sorry but Pasta found the perfect way to pander to me, a sequel to arguably one of the best animated films on CAYOM and hopefully enough shipping material to choke out a fanfic writer to make me one happy man

 

Come to think of it, I don't think any of my Year 5 films directly discuss romantic love as a theme.

 

*checks schedule*

 

Welp. I'm bland.