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SURVIVOR PANDORA Episode One: "You Ain't Got No Skill"

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@Agafin @AN9815 @Cap @DAJK @Eric from Progressive @Ethan Hunt @Fancyarcher @Gokai Red @Goldenhour36 @M37 @Morieris @NannerManCan @Reddroast @Shanks @YM! @ZeeSoh

 

Shortly before the weekend challenge, the tribes get to know one another in the barracks.

 

In the Weeping Willows room, everyone is getting ready for the challenge. Suddenly, DAJK pulls Cap aside.

 

DAJK: Hey! You hosted Survivor last season, right?

Cap: Well, it was a joint hosting between me and SLAM!...

DAJK: Oh, right…

Cap: You look pale. What’s the matter?

DAJK: Please tell me about last season! I don’t remember anything that happened! And I don’t know why YM! is mad at me!

Cap: Uhhhhh… To tell you the cliff-notes version, you betrayed him in a tribal council… And as far as the network goes, they gave you a “villain edit.”

DAJK: A what now?! I would never be a villain! I eat too much ice cream to be a villain! This is an existential nightmare! (runs off)

Cap: DAJK, wait—aaaaand he’s gone.

 

Meanwhile, Eric from Progressive notices that Gokai Red, Goldenhour36, M37, and NannerManCan—the team’s newbies—are in a circle. Casual chit-chat—but Eric isn’t having it.

 

Eric from Progressive: (to himself) I don’t like the look of that hubbub. If those newbies come together, it could spell disaster for the tribe’s veterans. I better do something about it!

 

Eric joins the circle and covertly drops a banana peel on the ground.

 

Eric from Progressive: Heyyyyy… What’s everyone’s favorite fruit? Just out of curiosity?

NannerManCan: Uh… Oranges.

Gokai Red: Nothing beats a groovy guava!

M37: Bananas—for the potassium.

Goldenhour36: I like golden apples! Speaking of which, I’ll go get one!

 

Goldenhour36 turns, slips on the banana peel, and falls down. 

 

Goldenhour36: Ouch!

Eric from Progressive: Oh no. He slipped on someone’s banana peel.

NannerManCan: I think I know who put—

Gokai Red: Hold on a minute. M37 said that bananas were his favorite fruit.

M37: Well I did say that, but it wasn’t my banana peel, so…

Gokai Red: Oh, I see how it is!

 

Gokai Red slides his jacket off and hands to NannerManCan. He raises his fists.

 

Gokai Red: Two choices, pal: own up to the peel, or own some bruises!

Eric from Progressive: (nervous laughter) Woah there! Let’s not throw hands right before the challenge! I’m sure it was just an accident! Ha ha!

NannerManCan squints his eyes at Eric.

 

Ethan Hunt saw the whole thing from afar. He grins.

Ethan Hunt: (to himself) This season will be easier than I thought!

 

****

 

In the Angry Arnolds lodge, while everyone is getting ready, AN9815 blows a party horn.

 

AN9815: First challenge, here we come! (blows party horn)

Fancyarcher: Stop with the birthday noise! I’m gonna go deaf!

The Dark Alfred: Hey Agafin. Want a homemade brownie?

Agafin: No thanks…

Reddroast: Ooh! I’ll take one!

 

YM! and ZeeSoh stand together, gazing at the quintet of dysfunctional dolts. ZeeSoh sighs.

 

ZeeSoh: Looks like we have our work cut out for us.

YM!: I see what you mean. Lots of characters on this tribe, that’s for sure.

ZeeSoh: What do we do? As good as we are at corralling a tribe, there’s only two of us…

Shanks: Make it three.

 

YM! and ZeeSoh turn around and see Shanks, who’s leaning against a wooden pillar. He steps up and waves hello.

 

Shanks: From the looks of things, you’ll need a levelheaded player to help keep the tribe together. I think I can help you with that.

YM! and ZeeSoh exchange glances.

ZeeSoh: Well, we could use the help, but… You’re kind of intense about it.

Shanks: Why wouldn’t I be? It’s an intense game, after all.

YM!: Touché. Welcome aboard, Shanks.

Shanks nods and goes back to brooding.

 

Confessional—Shanks: Everything I told them was the truth. No tomfoolery, no shenanigans. Because as fun as outwitting and outlasting be, if I don’t help pull this tribe together, none of us will have the opportunity to play the game the way it was meant to be played.

Confessional—ZeeSoh: I’m not sure if I trust Shanks. He presents himself as honest, but that only gets you so far in Survivor. But if he’s any Bruce Wayne, he’s Robert Pattinson’s Bruce Wayne. That’s the vibe I get.

 

****

 

Everyone meets at the base's basketball court.

 

SLAM!: For this challenge, everyone will play 1-on-1 basketball against a player from the opposite team. Good luck!

 

*Basketball montage with the rocky theme.*

 

[Sorry for rushing to the results this time]

 

 All right! Let's see how you did:

 

THE WEEPING WILLOWS

Spoiler

Eric - 85.08%

M37 - 76.77%

DAJK - 75.92%

NannerManCan - 73.95%

Ethan Hunt - 73.05%

Goldenhour36 - 72.95%

Gokai Red - 69.59%

Cap - 68.9%

TEAM AVERAGE - 74.53%

 

 

THE ANGRY ARNOLDS

Spoiler

ZeeSoh - 76.4%

Fancyarcher - 74.98%

Agafin - 73.16%

AN9815 - 72.69%

YM! - 72.51%

Reddroast - 72.39%

The Dark Alfred - 71.18%

Shanks - 64.97%

TEAM AVERAGE - 72.29%

 

SLAM!: This means that the winner of the weekend challenge is...

 

Spoiler

THE WEEPING WILLOWS

 

This means The Angry Arnolds are headed to tribal council.

 

Look forward to getting individual messages telling you how many concession stand coins you earned this round! In the meantime, please read this

 

IMPORTANT INFORMATION DOSSIER

(Concession Stand Info/Tribal Council Info/Next Weekend Challenge)

Spoiler

CONCESSION STAND

The Concession Stand is officially open for business!

 

Every week, a subset of items will be on sale. Buy a quick boost now, or wait for something better down the road! 

 

Blue Raspberry Icee - 3 Coins (Gives your weekend predictions a boost of 3%.)

 

PM me if you want it by Thursday, September 29th at 11:59PM EST! Also, remember that you do not need to use any item you buy this week! Simply indicate in any weekend game when you will be using it!

 

***

 

 

TRIBAL COUNCIL - ANGRY ARNOLDS ONLY

Sorry Angry Arnolds, but you will be sent to Tribal Council. All team members must send me a message with who they wish to vote off the island. However, there is hope. The second immunity challenge is also listed below. Winning the challenge will make you immune from elimination for this week.

 

SECOND IMMUNITY: PREDICT THE FOLLOWING TUESDAY GROSSES OF...

DC's League of Super-Pets

The Invitation

See How They Run

The Woman King

 

Votes are due by Wednesday at 5PM EST.

Second Immunity Predictions are due by Tuesday, September 27th at 11:59 PM PST.

(I recommend giving your vote alongside your second immunity predictions.)

 

Good luck to all of the Angry Arnolds!

 

***

 

WEEKEND CHALLENGE #2 (w/ info about the BROS TWIST)

That's right. Next week is a one-week twist inspired by the movie Bros.

 

You see, I asked you to pick a number between 1 and 25 for a reason.

 

Because next week, you're playing in duos.

 

You will individually submit predictions just like last week.

 

And you'll also send your own individual vote (if in tribal).

 

But that individual vote will be for a duo.

 

You'll combine weekend averages with your bro,

earn coins with your bro [earnings are doubled],

and face tribal council with your bro.

 

Whichever player...

of the duo with the most votes at tribal council...

has the lower tribal challenge score...

is the one who gets eliminated!

 

Weeping Willows

Winning this week's challenge gives you an advantage: you get to know who you're paired with in advance!

 

- NannerManCan (7) and Cap (42)

- Ethan Hunt (7) and Goldenhour36 (24)

- DAJK (15) and Gokai Red (21)

- M37 (17) and Eric from Progressive (18)

 

As you can see, I determined the duos based on the proximity of your number to the median of your tribe's collective numbers. How refreshingly resourceful!

 

Angry Arnolds

Because Morieris replaces whoever you eliminate, I cannot reveal your pairs until after I announce the tribal council results.

 

THE NEXT WEEKEND CHALLENGE

Here's the films you'll predict weekend grosses for:

Bros

Don't Worry Darling

The Good House

Minions: The Rise of Gru

Pearl

Smile

The Woman King

 

Predictions are due by Thursday, September 29th at 11:59 PM PST. Good luck!

 

Edited by SLAM!
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1 hour ago, DAJK said:

I was a villain last season? ... *gasp*

I can attest that you were not the villain last season. But that’s a tale for another time

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3 hours ago, DAJK said:

I was a villain last season? ... *gasp*

Looks like Legion blackmailed network executives for this villain edit. 
 

Like Cap I can also attest DAJK was not a villain though I can understand why Legion would think so (you were instrumental in his elimination after all lol). 

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@Agafin @AN9815 @Cap @DAJK @The Dark Alfred @Eric from Progressive @Ethan Hunt @Fancyarcher @Gokai Red @Goldenhour36 @M37 @Morieris @NannerManCan @Reddroast @Shanks @YM! @ZeeSoh

 

Thank you for a successful first weekend challenge! I have a few announcements for the next tribal council and the next weekend challenge.

 

Tribal Council - For the Angry Arnolds

I want to clarify that, yes, ZeeSoh is immune from being voted against since he had the 1st-place prediction on the Angry Arnolds tribe. Send me those Tuesday predictions and your vote for who you want eliminated by midnight tonight!

 

Another Twisty Twist

The duo with the highest combined average prediction for The Good House will have something special happen to them. Good luck!

 

Late Submissions - Update

Last week, I introduced many strict rules about late submissions, including people being eliminated by default if they're the only one who didn't submit predictions. Today, I've decided to go back to normal rules where players who submit and players who don't submit are all eligible to be voted out; the only rule I'm keeping is that a player's unsubmitted score will not effect the tribe's weekend average. (And of course, players will still be eliminated on the second time they're inactive.)

 

Since everyone submitted the first round, it showed me that everyone in this cast is here to play, so I've figured that those stricter rules aren't as necessary anymore. So there comes the drama--one player predicted and another didn't, but which one will be eliminated? Also, Hurricane Ian might take away power for some players on the American East Coast this weekend, and I won't penalize players for losing access to the internet due to a hurricane.

 

But I will stress that because of the Bros twist for next weekend challenge, it is imperative that you submit weekend predictions because if one member of a duo doesn't submit, then the whole duo's average cannot be counted in the team's average. So get those weekend predictions in by Thursday night or before the announcement of Thursday preview numbers!

Edited by SLAM!
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On 9/26/2022 at 11:07 PM, SLAM! said:

Gokai Red slides his jacket off and hands to NannerManCan. He raises his fists.

 

Gokai Red: Two choices, pal: own up to the peel, or own some bruises!

 

I genuinely laughed out loud at this; I wish I had been there to see it (am I still banished?)

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11 minutes ago, Morieris said:

 

I genuinely laughed out loud at this; I wish I had been there to see it (am I still banished?)


Your character is still banished, but the banishment ends during tonight’s tribal council, where your character makes a surprise appearance! I’ll tag you with the Arnolds.

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Speaking of tribal council,

 

@Agafin @AN9815 @The Dark Alfred @Fancyarcher @Reddroast @Shanks @YM! @ZeeSoh

 

Everyone eligible for second immunity submitted Tuesday predictions (🎊), but I need a few votes to eliminate!

 

I will publicly declare that my deadline for submitting the vote to eliminate is 7:00 PM EST if you haven’t done so already! This is my deadline so that I can have tribal council results posted before 8:00 PM in order to catch the Survivor TV show, which I’m somewhat obsessed with (🤪).

 

I’m not sure if I posted the rule before, but not submitting a vote equals voting for yourself (😱). This rule is inspired by the system used in the Roblox Survivor game Outlaster. Be sure to get your vote in!

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@Agafin @AN9815 @The Dark Alfred @Fancyarcher @Morieris @Reddroast @Shanks @YM! @ZeeSoh

Ughuhhighihhuhjihhhgh

 

I will declare a new rule

 

Starting next week, Disney/Fox will never again have films in the “predict these films” list for Tuesday tribal challenges…

 

There’s gonna be some delays tonight since I’m waiting for the See How They Run because Disney/Fox is dragging their feet with announcing their Tuesday numbers across the board. I’m asking them “what gives” because most of the other distributors were more than willing to announce their numbers in a timely manner, and Disney/Fox is too busy looking for a new Blade director to announce their Tuesday numbers, smh 😤

 

But yeah, if you’re an Angry Arnold who hasn’t voted yet, you have a little bit more time to do so because of Disney’s tardiness. Even if you won immunity by scoring first in the weekend challenge, I still recommend voting someone out because depending on how things out in the tribal council, players might have an opportunity to earn some concession coins… 👀

 

Anyways, good luck with the tribal; the next time I tag everyone in this manner, it’ll be for the tribal, so stay tuned! 😉

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@Agafin @AN9815 @The Dark Alfred @Fancyarcher @Morieris @Reddroast @Shanks @YM! @ZeeSoh

 

TRIBAL COUNCIL #1

 

The Angry Arnolds enter Tribal Council.

 

SLAM!: Welcome to tribal council! One by one, everyone will vote for which player they want to eliminate from the game. But first, a surprise appearance...

 

Morieris, in Na'vi form, swings in on a vine, does a backflip, and lands on her feet, astonishing everyone.

 

Morieris: Hi you guys!

AN9815: Morieris? Is that really you?

Morieris: Yep!

Reddroast: What exactly happened in banishment?

Morieris: Oh, you know! I foraged around, got chased by a Thanator, saw some woodsprites, made a campfire, now I'm here!

Fancyarcher: A Thanator?! Isn't that the panther thing that attacks Jake Sully?!

The Dark Alfred: Radical, man!

(ZeeSoh stares at Morieris, blushing a bit.)

SLAM!: Alrighty! As a reminder, Morieris replaces the tribemate you're voting out tonight. Let's vote! Reddroast, you're up first.

 

*One by one, the Angry Arnolds.*

Reddroast: If this goes well, I may not be the first one out again.

YM!: I need to make a logical decision. What to do, what to do...

Agafin: (jots name down without saying a word)

AN9815: 🎵Time for the vote, do-ba-do-do-doooooo! Time for the vote!🎵

The Dark Alfred: This player's no-bueno, bro!

Fancyarcher: I wish we didn't have to vote people out! 😫

ZeeSoh: I wish could vote multiple players out... 😑

Shanks: Hmph.

 

 

SLAM!: If anybody has an advantage or an immunity idol and they would like to play it, now would be the time to do so.

 

*Crickets.*

 

SLAM!: All right. I'll start by revealing the winner of the Second Immunity Challenge!

Spoiler

AGAFIN wins with a  92.39% average!

 

Everyone peers over at Agafin, who smiles.

Agafin: You win some, you win some.

 

Confessional - Agafin: I probably didn't need to win this, but there's something to be said about showing your tribe that you're worth your salt. Hopefully they'll want to keep me around longer.

 

SLAM!: Let's reveal the vote. First vote:

Spoiler

The Dark Alfred

 

Second vote:

Spoiler

Shanks

 

Third vote:

Spoiler

YM!

 

Fourth vote:

Spoiler

Shanks

 

Fifth vote:

Spoiler

Shanks

 

First person voted out of Survivor: Pandora...

Spoiler

 

Spoiler

 

Spoiler

SHANKS

 

SLAM!: That's four, that's enough, you need to bring me your torch.

Shanks reluctantly grabs his torch.

Shanks: (to the tribe) Don't come crying to me when this tribe falls apart.

Shanks presents his torch to SLAM!.

SLAM!: Shanks. The tribe has spoken.

SLAM! snuffs the flame.

SLAM!: Time for you to go.

Shanks: ...Hmph.

Shanks walks off.

The Dark Alfred: Sayonara, dude!

Dark Alfred laughs; Agafin, AN9815, Fancyarcher, and Reddroast laugh with him.

ZeeSoh: So much for "keeping the tribe together," huh.

YM! shoots ZeeSoh a wink.

 

Confessional - YM!: So you say you're gonna keep the tribe together, but your numbers aren't up to snuff... Sounds like the people you wanted to "keep together" kept themselves together just fine. Sorry, Shanks, but when it's your time, it's your time.

Confessional - The Dark Alfred: Who'd wanna vote the loony leafy man? Better keep my eyes peeled...

 

 

 

 

Okay! Now that Morieris is joining the Angry Arnolds, I'm going to announce your pairings for the duo competition. Now, you're still sending me individual weekend predictions like last week, but I'm revealing the pairings ahead of the next weekend prediction deadline anyway. Use it for strategy, or don't, what have you...

 

Without further ado, the Bros pairings are:

Spoiler

- YM! (3) and Reddroast (22)

- ZeeSoh (7) and Agafin (18)

- Morieris (8) and The Dark Alfred (18)

- Fancyarcher (8) and AN9815 (15)

 

ZeeSoh/Agafin and Morieris/Dark Alfred paired together so both pairings could have one veteran and one newbie.

 

Thank you for attending tribal council! I will send individual messages to you if you earned coins during this tribal council. In the meantime, have a good night!

 

And be sure to-

 

and I'll tag the other tribe so they see the reminder (@Cap @DAJK @Gokai Red @Goldenhour36 @M37 @NannerManCan @Eric Smiley @Ethan Hunt)

 

-Be sure to Predict for the Next Weekend Challenge if you haven't already!

 

Again, the films are:

- Bros

- Don't Worry Darling

- The Good House

- Minions: The Rise of Gru

- Pearl

- Smile

- The Woman King

 

The deadline is tomorrow night at 11:59 PM PST, or before the announcement of Thursday preview numbers. Good luck in Week #2 of Survivor: Pandora!

Edited by SLAM!
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@Agafin @AN9815 @Cap @The Dark Alfred @DAJK @Eric Smiley @Ethan Hunt @Fancyarcher @Gokai Red @Goldenhour36 @M37 @Morieris @NannerManCan @Reddroast @YM! @ZeeSoh

 

Here’s an obligatory reminder that predictions for the next weekend challenge are due tonight by 11:59 PM PST (if you haven’t predicted yet)!

Edited by SLAM!
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@Agafin @AN9815 @Cap @The Dark Alfred @DAJK @Eric Smiley @Ethan Hunt @Fancyarcher @Gokai Red @Goldenhour36 @M37 @Morieris @NannerManCan @Reddroast @YM! @ZeeSoh

 

NEXT TIME ON SURVIVOR…


THIS MONDAY

 

NannerManCan: If you can drive a forklift, you can row a kayak!

 

WITNESS THE AVATAR-THEMED KAYAK RACE

 

Fancyarcher: I’m beginning to think we should have taken the other route!

 

OF EPIC PROPORTIONS

 

Eric Smiley: The tribe will be mine! All mine! Mwa ha ha ha!

 

SURVIVOR PANDORA

EPISODE TWO:

”BROS BEFORE ROWS”

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