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Water Bottle

WB's Top 25 2017 Movies and Pop Culture Honors

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Tonight I plan to watch Mudbound. With Mudbound, I will have watched 70 movies this year which is a massive increase from last year where I saw 51 movies before making my list. I've seen a lot of blockbusters, independent movies, and every live-action feature length domestic non-documentary film that got nominated for an Academy Award-and a lot of ones who got Golden Globe nominations too.

 

I will also do the following pop culture honors:

Best TV Drama

Best TV Comedy

Best Computer Game

Best Xbox One Game

Best Nintendo Switch Game

Best Nintendo 3DS Game

Best PS4 Game

 

No Best Song because like I don't know music so I'd probably just be lazy and put a random theme from John Williams' The Last Jedi soundtrack.

 

And I will also do the bottom 5 films and honorable mentions for films that barely missed the best list.

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Best PS4 Game:

 

3max.jpg

MLB The Show 17

 

I'm sure this pick will surprise many. But what about Horizon Zero Dawn?  Technically I own it but technically I have not played it. Look, it's hard to get me to find time to play video games between the time I spend writing, running this forum, watching TV, and watching movies. And the World Series got me to check out MLB The Show 17 even though before then I thought baseball was boring. Is baseball boring? Kinda still. (Sorry @Telehilation and @4815162342 and @MrPink) BUT MLB The Show 17 got me to care way more about the sport so for that reason it's the best PS4 game.

 

Next up is a special "award" for a film I didn't rank!

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9 minutes ago, Water Bottle said:

Best PS4 Game:

 

3max.jpg

MLB The Show 17

 

I'm sure this pick will surprise many. But what about Horizon Zero Dawn?  Technically I own it but technically I have not played it. Look, it's hard to get me to find time to play video games between the time I spend writing, running this forum, watching TV, and watching movies. And the World Series got me to check out MLB The Show 17 even though before then I thought baseball was boring. Is baseball boring? Kinda still. (Sorry @Telehilation and @4815162342 and @MrPink) BUT MLB The Show 17 got me to care way more about the sport so for that reason it's the best PS4 game.

 

Next up is a special "award" for a film I didn't rank!

 

This is the Canadian cover *thinking emoji*

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Remember how I said I watched 70 films? Well that's not entirely accurate. I actually watched 71 films but one of the films, I had to give an A and an F to at the same time. Thus it couldn't ranked and doesn't count with the rest of the 70 films (plus it keeps the number of ranked films at an even number).

 

So therefore I debut the

 

Tommy Wiseau Award

Awarded to a film so terrible and yet surprisingly watchable and even compelling in how bad it is

 

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The Book of Henry

 

I really recommend checking it out. It really is...a movie with a nonsensical crazy plot.

 

Next up Best Nintendo 3DS Game.

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Best Nintendo 3DS Game

 

Pokemon_UltraSun_Pokemon_UltraMoon.jpg

Pokemon UltraSun/UltraMoon

 

I guess I shouldn't have included the Nintendo 3DS as an award thing. I realized just now I haven't bought a 2017 game for the Nintendo 3DS. So with the caveat I don't even own, much less have played, Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon (yet), I do know if that I did and had, this would be the best 3DS game simply because it's a main Pokemon title "upgrade" of Sun and Moon, which I really liked.

 

Next up is the Worst 5 Movies. Rather than stretching them out anymore than necessary, I'm just going to do them all in one post.

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The 5 Worst Movies of 2017

A list that should be devoid of any controversy because these movies were just bad.

 

#5

 

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The Greatest Showman

 

It begins with an old-fashioned 20th Century Fox logo. I think "okay this might be good." It plays another old-fashioned 20th Century logo. I think "okay this is gonna be bad." And that's the movie: it has some good parts, Zac Efron is MVP, but ultimately the bad overshadows the good in every respect.

 

#4

 

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Rough Night

 

A shady premise for a comedy (women accidentally kill hooker) is stupid, isn't funny at all, and has only a few redeeming qualities. Rough Night is a very rough experience to go through. If you want a great female group comedy, Girls Trip is superior in literally every single way.

 

#3

 

r_piratesofthecaribbeandeadmentellnotale

Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Men Tell No Tales

 

It's not as bad as I thought it would be. But it's largely forgettable. There are some things I liked but it's lack of ambition holds the movie way back. Also I've had enough of Jack Sparrow.

 

#2

 

The_Mummy_(2017).jpg

The Mummy

 

Brendan Fraser's The Mummy has a stupid plot but it's a lot of fun. Tom Cruise's The Mummy is just stupid with no fun. What's worse is how constructed it feels. This is what a fabricated in a factory movie plays like. Without any heart or soul, it's a movie that utterly fails at setting up a cinematic universe. MCU (and to a degree even DCEU) work because you connect with the characters: you will struggle to do that with such a lackluster film.

 

#1

 

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Rings

 

The worst movie of the year (that is not a winner of the Tommy Wiseau Award) is Rings. Characters you will root for? Forget it! A compelling update of the original? It tries but utterly fails. The ending is ridiculous and already retreading material from older sequels. The worst part? Rings is utterly boring. Devoid of any real value, one should not watch Rings. You'll die of boredom.

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Best Nintendo Switch Game

 

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Super Mario Odyssey

 

Let's face it: the real value in the Switch is the games Nintendo makes for it's own platform. This is proven by the amazing success of Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild but also by fun games like Super Mario Odyssey. The game is well polished with great level design. Exploring the world as Mario has never been more fun and this is a must-have title for a must-have console.

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It's time to begin the real reason you guys actually check out this thread: the morbid curiosity on which movies somehow made my top 25! For now I'm going to do TWO movies at a time!

 

#25

movieposter.jpg

LADY BIRD

Grade: B+

 

Lady Bird is a pretty great coming-of-age tale about a girl who just wants to get away from home and grow up. She doesn't always get along with her parents, thinks life is unfair, and dates a couple boys. It can be at times funny, it can be at times touching, and it can be compelling. It's not as good as Edge of Seventeen but Lady Bird nonetheless deserves at least a first watch.

 

#24

Thor-Ragnarok-Soundtrack.jpg

THOR RAGNAROK

Grade: B+

 

Thor Ragnarok is very funny. Goldblum is a national treasure and he's wonderful in this movie. The Hulk is probably the biggest scene-stealer even though Thor himself is hilarious. But the movie is more than just another funny Marvel movie. It blows up Asgard, Thor loses his eye, Odin dies. Loki and Thor made huge strides in their relationship. I still wouldn't trust Loki, not in the long-term, but I do feel he's learned some lessons. As for the action scenes? This is the first time in the whole MCU where Thor actually felt like the God Of Thunder! Thor Ragnarok is simply a blast.

 

Next up Best Xbox One Game.

 

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2 hours ago, Water Bottle said:

It's time to begin the real reason you guys actually check out this thread: the morbid curiosity on which movies somehow made my top 25! For now I'm going to do TWO movies at a time!

 

#25

movieposter.jpg

LADY BIRD

Grade: B+

 

Lady Bird is a pretty great coming-of-age tale about a girl who just wants to get away from home and grow up. She doesn't always get along with her parents, thinks life is unfair, and dates a couple boys. It can be at times funny, it can be at times touching, and it can be compelling. It's not as good as Edge of Seventeen but Lady Bird nonetheless deserves at least a first watch.

 

#24

Thor-Ragnarok-Soundtrack.jpg

THOR RAGNAROK

Grade: B+

 

Thor Ragnarok is very funny. Goldblum is a national treasure and he's wonderful in this movie. The Hulk is probably the biggest scene-stealer even though Thor himself is hilarious. But the movie is more than just another funny Marvel movie. It blows up Asgard, Thor loses his eye, Odin dies. Loki and Thor made huge strides in their relationship. I still wouldn't trust Loki, not in the long-term, but I do feel he's learned some lessons. As for the action scenes? This is the first time in the whole MCU where Thor actually felt like the God Of Thunder! Thor Ragnarok is simply a blast.

 

Next up Best Xbox One Game.

 

By default isn't best Xbox One game Forza 7? Did we get another exclusive last year? 

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1 hour ago, Tree Billboards said:

hulk scene stealer? the rock guy taika waititi played was the scene stealer...

He was A scene-stealer (in a movie that had a surprising number of them) but THE scene-stealer? I think you have to remember the character's name and not refer to him as "the rock guy Taika Waititi played" ;)

35 minutes ago, SchumacherFTW said:

By default isn't best Xbox One game Forza 7? Did we get another exclusive last year? 

It's not about exclusivity so no, not Forza 7. ;)

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Just now, Water Bottle said:

He was A scene-stealer (in a movie that had a surprising number of them) but THE scene-stealer? I think you have to remember the character's name and not refer to him as "the rock guy Taika Waititi played" ;)

It's not about exclusivity so no, not Forza 7. ;)

I don't remember any of the characters in Ragnarok apart from Thor and Hulk. And if Loki was in it then I know Loki, but can't remember if he was in it. Think he's stopped doing marvel movies?

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Best Xbox One Game

 

7b447add-6303-48ea-8993-0de4b74fc71a.jpg

Madden 18

 

I'm sure among gamers, this will be a very surprising pick but the fact is I've played Madden 18 probably the most of any game in 2017. There's lots of reasons for me to pick Madden 18: it got me more into football, GOAT QB Tom Brady is on the cover, and it's simply loads of fun. Plus I'm surprisingly very good at it. I'm sure some people will argue for Forza simply because it was exclusive but I don't own it or play it. Some might argue some other non-exclusive game but seriously: Destiny 2 was apparently very disappointing, Star Wars Battlefront II was a major flop, and most of the major releases that had major success were either computer or on the Switch.

 

Next up will be movie pick #23 (a science-fiction film) and #22 (a murder mystery).

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6 minutes ago, Tree Billboards said:

I don't remember any of the characters in Ragnarok apart from Thor and Hulk. And if Loki was in it then I know Loki, but can't remember if he was in it. Think he's stopped doing marvel movies?

 

Loki played a pretty big role. ;)

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