The Dark Tower | August 4, 2017 | McConaughey, Elba | Reviews coming in, it's a bomb etc. etc. - we know this drill by now

[The Panda]

To be fair, the novel is very good.  It's easy to understand why Tele stanned for it.

 

Spoiler

Even if it was a disaster 

 

Edited August 3, 2017 by El Panda Machos

[aabattery]

2 minutes ago, MrPink said:

 

Many have tried.

 

But many cannot defeat the man bun.

 

Of course, there are several who can DOM. 

 

It's actually the highest grossing film that features Matt Damon with a man bun. 

 

A stunning achievement, that few can hope to match.

[Fancyarcher]

1 minute ago, El Panda Machos said:

To be fair, the noble is very good.  It's easy to understand why Tele stanned for it.

 

  Reveal hidden contents

Even if it was a disaster 

 

Can't officially be a disaster, unless Tele stans for it.

[That One Girl]

On 5/3/2017 at 5:50 PM, That Floating Guy said:

Just watched the trailer.  As someone who hasn't read the books, I'm hyped as fuck.  Really digging McCounaughey's character so far and it looks suitably fun and action packed.

 

lol

[The Panda]

Also, to think my first 2017 oscar predicts included this movie 

[That One Girl]

 

Join.

[Mojoguy]

IT needs to be a HUGE hit, or we will NEVER be getting Stephen King's The Stand as a film trilogy.

Don't let that story live forever as an old miniseries from the 90s.

[That One Girl]

On 7/3/2017 at 8:28 PM, CJohn said:

Which one will do less: this or Valerian?

 

This.

[Arlborn]

 

http://www.tracking-board.com/the-dark-tower-review-stephen-king-movie-is-a-cgi-fueled-disaster-about-the-wrong-character/

 

Quote

It is not often that I am confounded by an adaptation to the degree that I am confounded by this one. That would not matter, of course, if the film worked as a standalone film, but it does not. In fact, the degree to which it does not work as a standalone film is breathtaking. This is a swing-for-the-fences attempt to get a franchise off the ground, and it is a fall-on-your-face-and-somehow-smash-your-own-balls failure. There are moments where it will make fans of Stephen King’s books sit forward, amazed and delighted at some of the things they try, and there are huge passages where those same fans will recoil so hard they will bruise themselves.

 

That's the kind of shit I feared the most; a crappy adaptation turning something great into a crappy movie. That's such a big shame. I'll still watch it myself and pass my own judgment on it but the stuff I've read so far is leading me to believe that even die-hard fans of the books(like me) won't be able to enjoy it much and that's just depressing.

 

Seriously, they didn't even keep the first line of the book as the first scene of the movie? What the fuck is wrong with them?? That line is the best opening line from a book I've ever read and it sets the tone perfectly, how the hell you don't use that in an adaptation? Gosh, that's just dumb. How do you screw it up that badly?? Damn.

 

They even had the perfect Gunslinger in Elba. I'm honestly baffled by what I'm reading in the reviews, just baffled. They even made the whole story about the kid apparently.

 

The level of incompetence required to screw it up so badly to the point that it's barely an adaptation is staggering.

 

 

PS: Lots of spoilers in that review for the books and the movie, if you care.

 

Edited August 3, 2017 by Arlborn

[That One Girl]

[Rman823]

Sony start of the summer: Sony end of the summer: 

[ZattMurdock]

13 minutes ago, That Floating Guy said:

OMG I'm dying 

[MrGamer]

Tom Rothman at the beginning of summer:

 

 

Tom Rothman at the end of summer:

 

Edited August 3, 2017 by MrGamer2558

[BORDISUEI]

2 bombs in less than 15 days

please stop, Sony

[ZattMurdock]

3 minutes ago, BORDISUEI said:

2 bombs in less than 15 days

please stop, Sony

And it won't stop if they don't get clever. Both Venom and Silver and Black are just yet another bombs waiting to happen. Hopefully they will give up before starts production. 

[TalismanRing]

 

It's obviously an art house flick.

 

Speaking of garbage, right now I'm watching Free Fire.  

 

Expletive Expletive Whine Whine  Expletive Expletive Whine Whine  BangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBang  Expletive Expletive Whine Whine BangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBang  - repeat for 90 hellish empty minutes of rampant stupidity.

 

[That One Girl]

It's too perfect.

 

[That One Girl]

3 minutes ago, TalismanRing said:

 

It's obviously an art house flick.

 

Speaking of garbage, right now I'm watching Free Fire.  

 

Expletive Expletive Whine Whine  Expletive Expletive Whine Whine  BangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBang  Expletive Expletive Whine Whine BangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBangBang  - repeat for 90 hellish empty minutes of rampant stupidity.

 

 

Yeah I just watched Free Fire tonight and it's bland as all fuck

[grim22]

3 minutes ago, That Floating Guy said:

It's too perfect.

 

 

And... it's 18% 

[That One Girl]

Just now, grim22 said:

 

And... its 18% 

 

fuckkkk

 

Well at least that screenshot is saved