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SUR(VI)VOR Ep. 11: COUNTDOWN TO A LIGHTHOUSE

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@DAJK @JJ-8 @Keanu @Spaghetti @Thanos Legion @ZeeSoh  @chasmmi @Claire of Themyscira @PanaMovie @Sheikh @Wrath

@SLAM!

 

Previously On Survivor:

 

[Insert Challenge]

 

 

The Survivors meet Captain Wondyful at Grand Army Plaza.  They gather around the William Tecumseh Sherman Victory.  

 

CAP: Survivors, Gather round.  First things first, I'll take that back.  

 

JJ-8 hands Cap the Paper Machine Popcorn Immunity Idol.

 

CAP: Welcome to Central Park.  We're here to honor the harbor and waterways there are all these historic and amazing lighthouses. As much as we'd love for you to see ALL to them in person, this isn't the Amazing Race.

 

SLAM!: Throughout Central Park, we've hidden three replica Lighthouses for you to find. Each of you has an app on your phone with clues and a compass.  Once you get all the clues, the App will unlock the Lighthouse location. If you get too many wrong answers or run to zero on the Countdown, the phone also is programmed to self-destruct. 

 

CAP: Each of the three Lighthouse has a Script on them.  You must find the script and bring it back here, to us.  Then the phone will unlock your next Lighthouse.  The Final Lighthouse is outside the Park.

 

SLAM! AND CAP: GOOD LUCK!

 

The Gene Kellys pull up the App. It directs them to the new Box Office Mojo.

 

DAJK: HOW ARE WE SUPPOSE TO USE THIS?!!!

 

The teams both work quickly on the first clue to find the Lighthouse at Fort Clinton.  They look out toward where the canon fires and see the Lighthouse.  They grab the script of Singin In the Rain and head back to base camp.

 

north-end-3.jpg

 

The Gene Kellys find the script for Top Hat at Roosevelt Island Lighthouse replica on the Jackie O Reservoir from the clues: "What a president without his first lady?" and "The City of Gold towers above in West."  

 

Screen_Shot_2019-10-29_at_1.30.51_AM.png

 

As the Fred Astaires figure out that Execution Rocks Lighthouse is at Delacorte Theater, which is staging a production of Shakespeare's Julius Caesar.  They grab the script to Zeigfields' Follies and race back to camp. 

 

274425332-delacorte-theater-turtle-pond-

 

The Fred Astaires rush back to Grand Army Plaza, tag the Victory Statue, and hand Captain Wondyful the script pages.  They have completed all three Lighthouses in the park  Then they collapse.

 

WRATH: C'mon, team.  It's just the last leg.  We can DO THIS.  We're in the lead.

CHAS: I can't feel my thighs.

WRATH: We're not going back to tribe council!  Not after everything we've gone through!

SHEIKH: But if we win, we doom Keanu --

 

Sheikh stops as he sees The Gene Kellys enter the Plaza, also having completed all three lighthouses in the park.

 

CLAIRE: Now we lost our lead!

 

Cap takes the script pages from The Gene Kellys.  She passes out water and crackers to all the Survivors.


CAP: Congratulations, Survivors on completing the three laps!  Remember, the last lap is just a race.  And you have to actually GO to the real Lighthouse.  I think it's time to reveal who won our Western Stars Bonus.  This person will have an additional +2% added to their overall score.  And the winner is...
 

Spoiler
 
 
 
1
Spoiler

 

Western Stars Bonus
PanaMovie 48.74%
Chas 43.92%
Keanu 43.10%
JJ-8 42.57%
Wrath 42.57%
ZeeSoh 42.57%
Thanos Legion 41.77%
DAJK 41.72%
Sheikh 41.49%
Claire 40.36%
Spaghetti 36.23%

 

 

 

CAP: Congratulations!  As a reward, you've won your team an advantage in the final loop.  I see SLAM! coming with them right now.

 

The Survivors turn their heads to see SLAM! riding down the sidewalk on a horse -- and he's leading four more.  SLAM! dismounts, and then puts the reigns in PanaMovie's hands.  

 

SLAM!: Courtesy of the our friends at the NYPD Mounted Unit.  These well trained horses should have all the smarts to help you finish your last lap.

 

Upon seeing the horses, Thanos Legion grabs all of his tribe members and runs back into Central Park.  There's no time to waste now that the Fred Astaires have the advantage!  

 

Once they get back up to the Sheep Meadow, they finally pause to group.  Spaghetti pulls out his Countdown App.  A New clue has appeared:

 

Quote

 

"Let the Force Of Evil carry you to its end."

 

 

THANOS: What does that mean?  What is a Force of Evil?

 

All of his tribe members glare at him as if to say: Really?

 

DAJK: It could be anything! Injustice, money, revenge, lying -- 

KEANU: Cap and SLAM for making us do this.

SPAGHETTI: It reads its end; "its" is possessive.

JJ-8: And Force of Evil is in italics while everything else is in bold.  [He thinks] . It's a book, or a movie, or a Play or Musical.  Does it end at a lighthouse?

 

Meanwhile, the Fred Astaires -- still back at Army Plaza -- have just figured out Force of Evil is a movie, and are using Box Office Mojo to look it up.

 

CHAS: There's nothing here!  Only a Face of Evil about Ronald Reagan!

SHEIKH: It's a movie. It has to be a movie.

CLAIRE: Use IMDb!

WRATH: We can't!  It says BOM only!

PANAMOVIE: But BOM now IS IMDb!

WRATH:  It's IMDB Pro, and we can't use that without a paywall!

 

PanaMovie weighs his options.  He turns to SLAM! and Cap.  

 

PANAMOVIE: I wish to turn in this Candy Apple to access IMDBPro.

 

Cap and SLAM! look at each other and nod. 

 

SLAM!: Done!

 

The Fred Astaires search IMDBPro for Force of Evil.

 

Claire pulls up:

 

IMG_2356.PNG

 

CLAIRE: There, look, look, it's a LIGHTHOUSE!

SHEIKH: Pull up that one --

 

 IMG_2357.PNG

 

SHEIKH: That's the Hudson River --

CLAIRE: Facing New Jersey --

CLAIRE & SHEIKH: The George Washington Bridge!!

PANAMOVIE: Let's Ride!

 

The Fred Astaires mount their horses and head into the park to cut up across town.  They gallop as fast as is healthy for the horses.  

 

=

 

The Gene Kellys, still hurdled around their App, notice a stampede rush by them.  

 

DAJK: Thanos, follow them!

 

Thanos Legion runs as far as the Great Lawn baseball fields before he can no longer keep up.  He kneels on the ground and watches the time tick away on his Countdown App.  Finally his teammates arrive.

 

THANOS: They're going North.

JJ8: That's it?
THANOS: This place is an eight hundred acre maze! We are lucky we got this far.

KEANU: The Apps locked us out!  It's just a countdown Screen!

DAJK: We're gonna need a miracle.

 

As just as he says that a softball drops by their side -- and in comes a running:

 

THE GENE KELLYS: MARTIN SCORSESE?

 

The Survivors look over to see that Scorsese's playing softball with... Kevin Feige and others.  Taika Waititi's the ref. 

 

SCORSESE: Hey!  It's you from the theme park!  That was great last week.  Can I have my ball back?

SPAGHETTI: [holding the ball] Only if you tell us everything you know Force of Evil!

 

SCORSESE

 

 

 

KEANU: Yes, yes, yes, but where does it END?

SCORSESE: You want me to tell you the ending?

 

Kevin Feige runs up to them.

 

FEIGE: You can't tell them the end! That's Spoilers!

JJ8: Tell us WHERE.  WHERE does it end?  Is there a Lighthouse?

FEIGE: Oh, Where is fine.  It ends at the Little Red Lighthouse under the GW Bridge.

DAJK: How do we get there?
SCORSESE: This is NYC.  Take the Subway.

DAJK: We don't have Metro Cards.

 

Feige pulls out some of his Avengers Money and gives The Gene Kellys $50 for Metro Cards.

 

THE GENE KELLYS: THANK YOUUUU!

 

Spaghetti tosses Scorsese back the ball as he and his tribe members run to the nearest Subway Station.

 

SCORSESE: Oh, you have cash for that but not to show pictures like Force of Evil in repertory theaters or with TCM/Fathom Events.

FEIGE: That's not my department, Marty!

WAITITI: Discussion for a later time mates!  We have Oscar Smoothing in three hours and it's only the top of the third!

 

=

 

The Fred Astaires lose time on the horses as they cross W 125th Street to the Henry Hudson Walkway.  Once they hit the River it's pure North.

 

The Gene Kellys hop the A Train North.  It give them time to regroup.

 

The Countdown App still ticks down, down, down.

 

The Fred Astaires slow to let the horses rest for a few minutes.

 

The Gene Kellys finally reach Hudson Heights.  They trek over to Fort Washington Park.

 

The Fred Astaires ride past the Tennis World Courts, almost there.

 

The Gene Kellys run down the massive stairs of the park toward the River, frantically looking for how to get to the Lighthouse.

 

PanaMovie leads the Fred Astaires.  He SEES the Lighthouse in view.  He pushes his horse to reach it first.

 

JJ8 SEES PanaMovie on his horse from the walkway above.  With no direct route, he jumps the guard rail and half tumbles down the hill to the Lighthouse.

PanaMovie gallops.

JJ8 runs.

 

PanMovie dismounts and runs to grab the Mean Streets script taped to the Lighthouse.  

 

JJ8 catches up.

 

They both run.

 

They both reach it.

 

Their fingers TOUCH.

 

They both rip it down, and the script tears in half.  Each holds a half.

 

The other members of The Gene Kellys and Fred Astaire gather around.

 

SHEIKH: It's a tie?!

KEANU: It can't be a tie!

 

Cap and SLAM! appear.

 

CLAIRE: What just happened?

DAJK: Do we both win?

 

SLAM!: That was the closest finish we've had in Survivor History!

CAP: Amazing job, Survivor.  We're going to have to go to the tape for this one. For that, we're going to bring in @Jason, Captain Spreadsheet.

 

SLAM!, Cap, and Jason hover around video village and the spreadsheets to verify that all of the data's accurate and entered incorrectly.  With pensive faces, they all nodded in agreement.

 

A decision has been made.

 

CAP: Before I read the results, I want to tell you the story of Garry Robbins and the Barkley Marathons.  The Barkley is one of the most notoriously difficult marathons in the world.  It's a grueling 160km race through the Tennessee Mountains.  Through rain, through fog, up a mountain, down a mountain, night and day, you have 60 hours to complete five loops.  Garry Robbins has tried to complete the race four times.  In 2017, he finished with time of sixty hours, zero minutes, and six seconds.  They called it a DNF.  Did. Not. Finished.  Because sixty hours is sixty hours.  And highest average is highest average.

 

CAP flips over the Card to Reveal the Final Results:

 

Spoiler

 

THE FRED ASTAIRES
91wzQhFOc3L._SL1000_.png
MEMBER BONUS TOTAL
PanaMovie (+4%) 86.06%
Wrath   81.82%
Claire of Themyscira   81.56%
Sheikh   81.77%
Chasmmi   79.62%
Team Average:   82.17%

 

THE GENE KELLYS
GettyImages-484360405-5c80207c46e0fb0001
MEMBER BONUS SCORE
JJ-8         85.03%
Spaghetti         83.42%
Thanos Legion         81.96%
Keanu         81.86%
ZeeSoh         81.07%
DAJK         79.62%
Team Average         82.16%

 

 

CAP: With a 0.01% lead, The Fred Astaires win Weekly Immunity.

 

There is flabbergasted silence before The Fred Astaires erupt into a joyous celebration.

 

JJ8: That's NOT possible.

CAP: It is.  We've gone over the data at least twenty times.  It's just that close.

THANOS: But the Numbers and BOM have different totals.

SLAM!: We took that into consideration.  This is the breakdown of the scores:

 

The Numbers 862K Estimate
Gene Kellys 82.41%
Fred Astaires 82.46%
The Numbers 850K Estimate
Gene Kellys 82.32%
Fred Astaires 82.33%
BOM 830k Actual
Gene Kellys 82.16%
Fred Astaires 82.17%

 

SLAM!: All three scenarios end in the same results.

 

CAP: This is going to be a hard loss. We conferenced last night about what to do without a concrete number.  We talked about sending both tribes to Tribal Council.  We talked about omitting Jesus Is King all together.  We talked about switching it out for Western Stars.  But ultimately, it came down to Garry Robbins, and that six seconds over is six seconds over.  The Challenge was to predict Jesus Is King.  Western Stars was the Bonus.  We need to go with that.  I knew that regardless of what we decided we'd have a team possibly upset with us.  But this is the call.  PanaMovie winning the Western Stars Bonus and using a Candy Apple won the week for his tribe.

 

The Fred Astaires have Immunity.  The Gene Kellys will go to Tribal Council.

 

 

 

SLAM!: Our last point of Business is the Strategic Lighthouse Bonus.  Let's reveal the winner:

 

Spoiler

 

The Lighthouse Bonus
Keanu 98.82%
Wrath 98.50%
Sheikh 96.20%
Claire 95.94%
JJ8 94.02%
Thanos Legion 92.63%
ZeeSoth 90.89%
PanaMovie 87.89%
Spaghetti 87.33%
Chas 84.12%
DAJK 75.40%

 

SLAM!: Congratulations, Keanu! You have one a huge Strategic Decision!

 

Cap hands Keanu a letter.  She reads:

 

Quote

 

You have won a tough choice.
 

You must choose any member of the opposing tribe. 

 

You must choose any member from your tribe. You can even choose yourself. 


They will swamp tribes. 
 

There are no rules to this decision. No explanations needed. Swap out the weakest for the strongest. The strongest for the weakest. A friend for a foe. A foe for a friend. Or throw a shot in the dark. 
 

But you must choose. 
 

Choose wisely. 

 

This decision must be PM'd to @captainwondyful by Friday at 11:59PM EST, and will be revealed at next week's Weekend Challenge Episode.

 

wAAACH5BAEKAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAICRAEAOw==

  

 

 

 

 

 

CAP:  That's all I have for you.  For those going to Tribal Council, please by 11:59PM PST / 2:59PM EST TONIGHT

 

Send me:

 

PREDICT THE TUES ACTUALS FOR:

 

Maleficent

Joker

Addams Family 

Zombieland

Black and Blue

Countdown

 

Bonus, applicable to all who answer correctly: which film — from the entire list of Tuesday releases according to the-numbers.com — will have the highest jump from Monday? Correct: +1% bonus to score. Incorrect: Nothing. 

 

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16 minutes ago, Spaghetti said:

@captainwondyful IDK if anything would have changed but there was a big deal about how Netflix doesn't report box office numbers. Is The Irishman doing something different?

TBH, I didn't know that.  Better to just change that to... Once Upon A Time in Hollywood.

 

 

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TRIBAL COUNCIL

 

The Gene Kellys ( @DAJK @JJ-8 @Keanu @Spaghetti @Thanos Legion @ZeeSoh ) enter the Tribal Council area at the Old Pier 54, the intended final destination for the Titanic. 

 

W1siZiIsInVwbG9hZHMvcGxhY2VfaW1hZ2VzLzRk

 

The place their torches in sand buckets covered with James Cameron movie posters.  Then take their seats in six old movie theater seats.

 

@SLAM! and Cap wait.  They take a seat in their director's cuts across from the campfire fueled by old celluloid film.

 

SLAM!:  That was one of the closest, and wildest, Immunity Challenges we've ever seen.

 

The Gene Kellys nod, collectively saying: "Yeah, yeah it was."

 

CAP: 0.01% difference is why you're here, and the Fred Astaires aren't.

 

DAJK: There's no way around it.  It's garbage.  It doesn't feel good.  Someone's going to go home -- because you wouldn't call it a statistical dead heat.

 

CAP: If it'd been a statistical dead heat, we would've sent both Tribes to Tribal Council, and two people would be going.  You'd still be here.


DAJK looks away, not liking that answer.

 

SLAM!: Have you thought about how you'd vote tonight?

 

SPAGHETTI: We're all going to vote for one person each.

 

SLAM and Cap raise eyebrows at each other.

 

SLAM!: That seems reckless.

 

CAP: By all voting one each, you'd force a tie.  But no one could vote, because you'd all have a vote against each other. Clever, but not smart.  If it's a tie-again, we go to drawing Blu-Rays.  The player who randomly pulls the Blu-Ray with the disc inside goes home.  Do you want to trust all of this to luck?

 

SPAGHETTI: I do.  I trust all of my tribemates.

 

Cap nods.

 

SLAM!: Keanu, you have a big decision.  Have you thought about who goes and who stays?

 

KEANU: I think I know who I want to come, but I don't know how to pick between my tribe members.  We've gone through so much together! 

 

Keanu takes Spaghetti's hand. 

 

KEANU: I trust all of my tribemates and I don't want to let any of them go.  We'll have to just roll the dice on those Blu-Rays.

 

CAP: You're all in agreement about that?

 

The whole team shakes their heads.

 

SLAM!: On that note, it's time to vote.

 

 

The tribe members go to the voting and confessional booth.

 

Cap comes back with the voting vase.

 

SLAM!: I'm going to reveal the results of the Bonus.  The Answer to "Which Movie Had The Biggest Tuesday Percentage Jump?" is --

 

SLAM! flips over a card to reveal: 

 

SLAM!: Maleficent: Mistress of Evil with 74%

 

CAP: Congratulations,  Keanu, Spaghetti, Thanos Legion, and ZeeSoh all receive +1% to their scores.

 

SLAM!: Now, Before I reveal the results of the Immunity Challenge, does anyone have any tuck shop items they wish to use?

 

ZeeSoh stands.  They reveal a candy apple and hand it to SLAM!

 

SLAM!: This is a candy apple.  ZeeSoh will have +2% added to their scores, for a total of +3%.  Now, for the results

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Spoiler

IMMUNITY Score Bonus Total
DAJK 89.51% 0% 89.51%
KEANU 94.12% 1% 95.12%
SPAGHETTI 93.45% 1% 94.45%
THANOS 93.45% 1% 94.45%
ZEESOH 98.68% 3% 101.68%

 

SLAM!: ZeeSoh wins Immunity.  No votes cast against them will count!

 

CAP: Now, I'll read the votes.

 

She opens the cover of the vase and pulls out the first vote:

 

CAP: Once the votes have been read, the decision is final.  The person will be asked to leave the tribal council area immediately.

 

Spoiler

 

CAP: First Vote,

 

She reveals ZEESOH

 

CAP: Does not count.

 

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Spoiler

CAP: Second Vote, 

 

She reveals SPAGHETTI.

 

CAP: One vote Spaghetti.

 

Spoiler

 

Cap opens up the next vote.

 

CAP: DAJK.  One vote Spaghetti, one vote DAJK.  Three votes left.

 

 

Spoiler

 

Cap opens up the next vote.

 

CAP: Spaghetti.  Two votes Spaghetti, one vote DAJK. Two votes left.  

 

 

 

Spoiler
 
 
 
 
2
Spoiler

 

Cap opens up the next vote.

 

CAP: First member voted out of The Gene Kellys

 

Cap reveals: Spaghetti.

 

CAP: You need to bring me your torch. 

 

Keanu gasps.  She jumps up to hug Spaghetti.  There's a tear in her eye as she watches him grab his torch and walk to Cap and SLAM!

 

CAP: The tribe has spoken.

 

She extinguished his torch. 

 

Spaghetti walks out of the Tribal Area.

 

 

CAP: It's clear there's more going on than appears. Things are only about to get more interesting.  Keanu, I will need your decision by Friday Night.  

 

SLAM!: We'll reveal it on Monday with the Immunity Results! Have a good weekend, and

 

SLAM & CAP: Good Luck!

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Also I don't know if that's how it went down, but it was too tempting to put the "Confident not getting voted off to get voted off" trope.  Final Vote was Spaghetti 4, DAJK 1, ZeeSoh 1.

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I suppose that this is how the cookie crumbles.

 

Perhaps I felt comfortable that no one had conspired against me last week. Perhaps I should have held less hope that Kanye West would have disregard for a decent culture. Perhaps I could have trusted the A24 stans more.

 

But alas. The pasta has been drained.

 

It has been fun to conceive of the game from the start. I have nothing but respect and admiration for @SLAM! and @captainwondyful most of the players in this game. Most, being the operative word. I know for a fact that my elimination was a result of foul play. That is not me being petty. I have several reasons to believe this, and as Squidward says, I listen to public radio.

 

Be warned. There are wolves among your flock. It is a shame that you will not have my help to cover them, but that will not change anything now, and I accept my fate. I consider it a mark of honor that I was eliminated not as a burden, but as a threat. I like to think that I gave you all a good fight.

 

That being said, remember my warning to all of you prior to last weekend's challenge. I was forced into a position where I had to rely on the kindness of strangers to preserve myself. Just goes to show you how hard it is to truly trust someone nowadays.

 

Sooner or later, the chicken always comes home to roost.

 

 

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