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SUR(IV)OR: Episode 6 - Love is in the Err

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Spaghetti: 15 contestants remain. This week, it shall become 14. And don't worry, there won't be a scary twist again this week. I bet all of you are still reeling from last week. And dying to see what the big new ship is. But I digress. Your task is an EPIC. CAR. RACE. Get to the pavilion and make your predicts. Here. We. Go.




Chasmmi: I finally rid myself of the robots. Ethan had potential, but lord, they were all weak willed. 

Numbers: Hey, it's pretty low to beat on your old team like that.

Chasmmi: Oh, look who's a little goody two-shoes smarty pants. You realize they'll just turn on you once the teams merge?

Numbers: A risk I'm willing to take. I've got my eye on you, Chas. I've seen the stuff you pull to get ahead.

Chasmmi: *to self* Christ, did he and DAJK switch bodies?

Numbers: I digress. Battery, you up?

AABATTERY: You know it. We're just waiting for the rest of the toons to arrive. They don't seem to be in the best state at the moment. *He walks in, wearing a jacket* Mate, it' 80 degrees!

CoolEric258: I KNOW! *He reveals his wrinkled, disturbing face. He has been up all night plotting how to destroy Arlborn and avenge JJ-8.*

AABATTERY: Nevermind, put it back on! *He hears crying in the distance* Yikes, RandomJC is NOT taking ChipMunky's elimination well.


CONFESSIONAL - RandomJC: *incoherent sobbing*


AABATTERY: Mate, ChipMunky would want you to keep fighting.

RandomJC: But I can't anymore! I am WEAK. I should have been the one to go! *AABATTERY slaps him*

AABATTERY: Enough of that! You need to help us win this week. We're standing by you every step of the way.

RandomJC: *sniffling* Okay....I'll try. *The two walk to join the rest of the team. Random starts sobbing again.*


Eevin: Okay, are you serious, Wrath? You chose me and ARLBORN? Do you hate me or something?

Wrath: He's versatile. He's unexpected.

Eevin: He was obligated to be chosen. And it just HAD to be you.

Wrath: It's final, Eevin. No complaning.

Eevin: Fine, I hate you almost as much as Arlborn! *He peeks in from behind a bush*

Arlborn: I hear I have competition!

Eevin: Augh!

Arlborn: By the way, Goffe! I have a gift for you! *It is blue pudding.*

Goffe: You know, Eevin. You have a point. Want to grab a drink after this challenge?

Eevin: Sure.


DAJK: Our first week in! We're ready to rock it, right?

YourMother: You know it! It's time for all of you to fall in love --- er, I mean, line! We've gotta win this week!

Ethan Hunt: So Chasmmi's gone. He's the back of our team, and I'm his right hand man. I don't take orders.

DAJK: *unexpectedly* You will if you wanna stay in this week.

Ethan Hunt: Damn, didn't see that side of you before. *beat* I'm impressed. Now let's just wait for wheels to get here.

That One Guy: *being wheeled in in a chair by Elcaballero, otherwise fully healed.* I'm here, and I'm not weak. Thanks for choosing me again, DAJK. I'm healing a lot, and I'm almost back to full form.

Elcaballero:  We have to stand together. All of us.

YourMother: Including you, Ethan. *He looks to DAJK for approval.*

Ethan Hunt: Fine, go team.


CONFESSIONAL - YourMother: DAJK is such an amazing team leader! He chose me first of all people! Man, does he, um....no, don't do it. Everyone has gotten eliminated so far because of it. Snap out of it.


Wrath: Wrech.

WrathOfHan: Check.

Wrath: Crowbar.

WrathOfHan: Check. Car's fine, Wrath. We gotta keep moving soon. 

Wrath: I know a few tricks to optimize the speed. It'll be tough, but it's not like the car's gonna explode. Trust me on this. 

WrathOfHan: I've noticed you've been saying that a lot. It's amusing.

Wrath: That so? Well you seem happy to oblige often.

WrathOfHan: You have a naturally authoritative bent. What can I say? Reminds me of my dad.

Wrath: *pausing* Your dad?

WrathOfHan: He vanished when I was five. Barely remembered him, doubt he remembers me.

Wrath: So you've never really had a father figure, huh? I guess that explains a lot.

WrathOfHan: What the, you? My surrogate father. Nope. Not happening.

Wrath: But wait, I....

WrathOfHan: Let's not get ahead of ourselves. We're just teammates here.


CONFESSIONAL - Wrath: We're not, though. The thing about WrathOfHan.....he's my son.

WrathOfHan: *outside booth, muffled* I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!


AABATTERY: Creech, creech? Where are you! We need to win this challenge!

CoolEric258: *ahem.* Let me. CREEECH!!!! I WUV U!!!!! LUCAS TILLL!!!!!! *Creech arrives. He screams at Eric's face and runs off.*

AABATTERY: What was that about not letting revenge consume you?

Numbers: Come on, car's ready. This is gonna be intense.

RandomJC: No rush. Let's lose and get myself eliminated. Me and Chip still have a chance!

Numbers: Never say never. We're getting those coins.

Chasmmi: I'm driving. Everyone in. Now. *They drive off.*

DAJK: *Everyone is singing along to Closer.* Hey. I was doing just fine before I met ya.

Elcaballero: I drink too much and that's an issue but I'm okay.

YourMother: Stay, and play that Blink-182 song.

Ethan Hunt: Not the lyric, mate.
YourMother: What, it's in the song!
Ethan Hunt: Yeah, please, I remember when I first heard this song at the high school dance. I was talking to this girl and then I tried to touch her -
That One Guy: Okay, we get it!
DAJK: Too much information, mate!
CONFESISONAL - DAJK: What's going on with Ethan? He's either crazy evil or crazy awkward. Is he trying to throw us off?
CONFESISONAL - Ethan Hunt: I'm trying to throw them off. But that actually did happen. As I was saying, I was trying to touch her -
Arlborn: But Goffe, aren't you heartbroken about Numbers being on a different team? Want to ruin him and his team? Maybe also get someone who wants me dead?
Goffe: Someone wants you dead on this show? I had no idea. *Eevin laughs.*
Arlborn: Admit it, you love me.
Goffe: Yes. Loathe. *Arlborn makes a cartoonish, pouty frown. Arlborn, Eevin, and Goffe continue to bicker in the backseat. WrathOfHan is on his phone in the passenger seat, while Wrath tries to drive, talking to Wrath.
Wrath: Want to play any games on the car? 
WrathOfHan: Like scattegories? With those three? Good luck with that.
Wrath: *frowns*
*Wrath suddenly hears rhythm from Eevin and Goffe slapping Arlborn in the face, the car wheels turning, Elcaballero and That One Guy banging drums in the next car over a la Mad Max, but more broadway-esque, and CoolEric258 grimacing. He begins to hear music and sings.*
Wrath: Do you need a break from weekend convos? Do you long, to win a lot of dough?
Arlborn: We've got lots of fun and lots of friends?
Goffe: Just tell me soon when this all ends?
Wrath: When we are on the Survivor road!
WrathOfHan: *speaking* That doesn't even rhyme?
Wrath: Slant rhymes, baby!
WrathOfHan: Why oh why, was Chasmmi not the winner? Wrath was cool, but this morning quite blowed. At first I though, he wasn't so bad. All turns out he's a deadbeat dad. Let's just get off Survivor road!
Numbers: Oh Goffe I really miss you, We beat all power teams. And now I'm stuck with this psycho captain!
Chasmmi: Go ahead talk your piss, you, can only win in dreams, he won't make it to the merge let alone win!
DAJK: (and YourMother) Here we are, on our new path to winning (something big is now beginning!) And my track record has not yet slowed (He's so hot, wait make sure that's not showed!) 
DAJK: We're gonna make it to the final three.
YourMother: I still can't believe that he picked pick me!
DAJK and YourMother: Together on Survivor road!
That One Guy: Casts are off! One week away from freedom!
AABATTERY: But CoolEric's strangness did forebode.
RandomJC:  I don't care just place me at fifteen, I miss ChipMunky in each dream.
AABATTERY: Here still on, our old Survivor Road!
Eevin: Don't you see, Goffe how he pains me daily?  I would rather kiss a warted toad?
Goffe: Even when Numbers what at his worst, I swear Arlborn is just plain cursed.
Eevin and Goffe: Let's throw him, out on the open road!
Ethan Hunt: Tell these morons to bite me, let's move on to the merge, I'm the team's only genuine wiz.
That One Guy:  Wait a sec, please don't fight me, I must ask about your purge, when Damien Chazelle did make you *Car horn*
All: Every week, another awful challenge, one more person's chances will corrode, I can now see the pavilion! Come on guys, I think we won! I'll make it to the nine, I'll feel so mighty fine! It's now almost time! To depart the old survivor road!
*They all arrive at the pavilion and enter their predictions.*
CONFESSIONAL - YourMother: Why on earth did we do a Goofy Movie tribute? No one even saw that shit! It was so bad.
CONFESSIONAL - DAJK: Awww, that was one of my favorite movies as a kid!
CONFESSIONAL - YourMother: But upon more thought, it's an underrated masterpiece.
Spaghetti: That was an interesting episode, to say the least. But we must see who the stars of the new teams will be! Flying Cougars, you're up!
Wrath: Poughkeepsie State.
Spaghetti: I love Dodgeball, but we gotta draw the line somewhere.

@Wrath - 82.56%

@Goffe - 80.92%

@WrathOfHan - 80.82%

@Eevin - 78.61%

@Arlborn - 76.39%

AVERAGE: 79.86%


Spaghetti: Not too shabby. But will not too shabby win the week?


@chasmmi - 80.54%

@4815162342 - 77.26%

@aabattery - 72.73%

@CoolEric258 - 69.73%

@RandomJC - 61.38%

AVERAGE: 72.33%


Spaghetti: Rough week for the Sadbens. Fitting, honestly. Can the Kitschjobs keep you all from winning?


@DAJK - 83.94%

@YourMother - 82%

@That One Guy - 74.62%

@Ethan Hunt - 71.11%

@elcaballero - 70.32%

AVERAGE: 76.40%


Spaghetti: Nope! The Flying Cougars win! And the Sad Bens lose! 

Chasmmi: Ugh, you love sick, half wit, smart ass, low class jerks!

Spaghetti: Song's over, mate. *Chasmmi grimaces and sulks away.* Fifteen becomes fourteen this week. Will Numbers, Random, Eric, or AABATTERY? Go, with Chasmmi safe, can he whip the rest of his team into shape? Find out on Tribal Council this week in....BOT SURVIVOR.




Every week, a subset of items will be on sale at the tuck shop. Buy a quick boost now, or wait for something better down the road! Here is everyone's current balance. If you are not listed, you have 0 coins.


The guardian of each team gets two coins.

Every member of the winning team gets three coins.


Current Balance

11: Ethan Hunt, DAJK, Chasmmi

10: Wrath

9: Elcaballero

8: Goffe, Eevin

6: Arlborn, WrathOfHan

4: RandomJC

3: Numbers, ChipMunky

2: BourneFan, CoolEric258, AABATTERY

1: YourMother


STAIN REMOVER - 4 Coins (Removes the weakest score in your weekend prediction) - MAY ALSO BE USED FOR TRIBAL COUNCIL

RECYCLED PAD - 5 Coins (Doubles your vote in the Tribal Council)

POISON APPLE - 5 Coins (Reduces 2% from the score of another player)

TIME MACHINE - 9 Coins (You have until 1PM EST on FRIDAY to submit predictions (i.e. you get to see preview numbers for Friday openers!!!)


PM me if you want anything by Thursday, April 20th at 11:59PM EST! Also, remember that you do not need to use it this week! Simply indicate in any weekend game or Tribal Council when you will be using it!




Predict the Tuesday PTAs of the following:

The Fate of the Furious

Spark: A Space Tail


Going in Style

The Boss Baby


Predictions due Tuesday at 11:59PM EST!!!



Predict the rotten tomatoes scores of the five openers. They are....


Born in China


The Promise

Free Fire

Phoenix Forgotten


FIRST PLACE: You get to write your OWN flash fight challenge!

LAST PLACE: You lose half of your tuck shop coins.


Predictions due Tuesday at 11:59PM EST!!!



Born in China (Saturday)

Born in China (3-day)

Unforgettable (Sunday)

Unforgettable (3-day)

The Promise (Friday)

The Promise (3-day)

Phoenix Forgotten (3-day)

Free Fire (3-day)

The Fate of the Furious (3-day)

The Lost City of Z (3-day)

Colossal (3-day)

The Zookeeper's Wife (3-day)

Power Rangers (3-day)

Logan (3-day)

Get Out (3-day)


Predictions due Thursday at 11:59PM EST!!!



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