***SPOILERS*** ***SPOILERS*** ***SPOILERS*** ETERNALS ***SPOILERS*** ***SPOILERS*** ***SPOILERS***

[Valonqar]

30 minutes ago, keysersoze123 said:

What's the other post credit scene. One is with Styles is well known. 

 

Dane (Kit Harrington) has a secret of his own, a legacy sword Ebony Blade. He's about to take it out of the box but stops when he hears a voice, that everyone says belongs to Mahershalla Ali (Blade). 

[SpiderByte]

On 10/19/2021 at 8:52 PM, MrPink said:

Dying at this giant section on Starfox's wiki on allegations of sexual assault. What a role Harry Styles landed

Yeah that was a wild story arc. Maybe it means he pops into the She-Hulk show? That's where that storyline is from.

[dudalb]

I actually thought that Starfox might well show up on the She Hulk show as Jennifer's main squeez, but did  not think he would debut  in "The Eternals.", Still think he will be in "She Hulk" though.

 

[Valonqar]

Just got back. Fuckin like this! Was thoroughly entertained, not boring at all, moves at brisk pace, exposition heavy but not dull, at least I have a soft spot for nonsensical mythmaking so that was right up my alley.

 

Characters were a mixed bag. I agree too many of them, you could slash half and wouldn't miss a beat. Among them, Kingo was the MVP, an actual, well-rounded character, very funny, very natural performance, great chemistry with everyone. He and his valet Karun were fantastic. All jokes landed including the Bollywood skit. I know that there's some controversy around here but, IMO< it was an obvi skit, not a serious attempt at Bollywood. I also liked his reason for leaving and that they didn't pull a Han Solo (read: return to the battle to save the day).

 

I really liked Ikaris and I saw that redditors cannot accept that he killed himself but yes, he's not coming back. But what's with everyone being in love with him lol? Sersi, Sprite, Ajak, Kingo's latent homoeroticism? Spread the wealth!

 

Kit was awesome, very charming, we didn't see much of him but post-cred is a hint that he'll be a big player. The voice that said You sure you ready for this Wittman? is definitely Mahershalla Ali (Blade). 

 

Makari and Druig have a lot of potential. I really like these 2 and they'll make a cute couple.

 

That said, could not stand that entitled piece of shit Phastos, useless Thena (sorry, characters who get better characters killed are my pet peeve) and cringe Sprite. At least we are done with Sprite. Ajak was Basil Exposition and Gilgamesh was whatever, just a canon fodder I guess. Sersi was just a plot forwarder but unlike Kingo for example not much of a character. 

 

The story was stupid and actually worked better when it was a straight up comic book than when it imagined to be something else and gave an awkward social commentary. The latter produced some high level badness such as Phastos freaking out over an atomic bomb that his inventions led to and the face-palmer that was Druig mind controlling warring Mayans and conquistadors and making them drop weapons like zombies and I guess sing Kumbaya off screen. 

 

But anyway, mixed bag an and all I really enjoyed the whole thing. It was a great travelogue that went to X number of places, and mythmaking was both WTF and intriguing. It bit more than it could chew (Marvel created the universe y'all!) but I want to see where this will go next, now that Harry Styles came to their aid. He looks to be charming in this role. 

 

This is for now. Have a massive migraine. 

 

 

[Cap]

I can't believe I stayed off the internet for two weeks to avoid the Harry Styles spoiler.  Think of al the Succession Episode 3 memes I missed because of this.

 

Also, that was HILARIOUS, since

 

(1) when it broke my friend was like "TBH this doesn't affect you and I at all" and she was right!  

(2) when he showed up I was like, Wait, Orion's here -- and then I had to remember that was the version of this story that Jack gave **DC** not Marvel. L O L.

 

I also LOL at the DC Comics references. What a perfect property to finally acknowledge those comics exists.

[XXR vs XXR]

So I reaaaalllyyy enjoyed this overall. It's not perfect by any means but I'm extremely excited for what they do next. I won't do a big spiel about everything, but here's a general breakdown of my my pros and cons....

Pros

• World-building. I loved the expansion of the universe and what it all can mean.
• Lore. Goes with the world building. Seeing how the Celestials are involved in everything. What the Eternals really are, etc. 
• Plot. The overall story is great IMO. My only issue (not major but still an issue) is the way it's told.
• 75% of the acting. There's a lot of great moments in this thing, mainly believable emotion and timely humor. DTH and Angelina were the highlights here. 
• Visuals and Scenery. Obviously this is a beautifully crafted film. 
• Arishem!! 

 

Cons

• Needs to be about 20 minutes shorter and more concise. This is like a suped-up GOTG (in terms of the structural idea of a introducing a group of people we don't know). They needed to make this more concise to kill off some of the duller moments that don't really lead anywhere worthwhile. 
• More linear storytelling. I wasn't a huge fan of the way they jumped around the timeline. I think it would have been better served if it was more straightforward. 
• 25% of the acting was wooden. Unfortunately, not everyone delivers. Ikaris (Richard Madden) being the main one (until about the last 15 minutes) and that sucks the most since he's one of the two who are in the movie the most. I also didn't care for Barry or Selma's acting. 
• Villains were typical Marvel throwaway villains. They could have done a lot more with Kro to make you care, especially given his whole evolution arc from mindless animal into sentient being. 

 

Final Rating

78/100

 

 

 

[Legion Again]

4 hours ago, Cap said:

I can't believe I stayed off the internet for two weeks to avoid the Harry Styles spoiler.

I was really tempted to tell you point blank that the “huge post-credits spoiler” from the premiere was a complete nothing burger that you wouldn’t give two shits about

[Cap]

5 minutes ago, Eternal Legion said:

I was really tempted to tell you point blank that the “huge post-credits spoiler” from the premiere was a complete nothing burger that you wouldn’t give two shits about

tbh I was most mad that the Big Spoiler I knew cause @Valonqar posted it a while back. 🤡

[Legion Again]

18 minutes ago, Cap said:

tbh I was most mad that the Big Spoiler I knew cause @Valonqar posted it a while back. 🤡

When people were talking about a “big spoiler” that night initially I thought we were talking like “Ikaris kills Ajax” or “Eternals purpose is to destroy earth” not “some British whoever appears for 20 seconds.”

[TheDarkKnightOfSteel]

For its flaws, I loved this so much. Top 5 MCU films. Like it could drop some scenes, cut other short and even drop some characters without doing any difference but ultimately its flaws did not bother me.

 

It's the first time in an MCU film, aside from IW and EG that were the big climax of the franchise, that i felt real stakes in a MCU film.I kean the film end with a huge ass frozen Arishman in the middle of the ocean.

 

Zhao handles the pivotal characters, not all, with care. They have a purpose, a motivation  and a reason. And their actions and decisions  make sense.

 

Ikaris was my favorite. First and foremost because he is not a bad guy yet he did some terrible things. Turned against his own family and tried to kill them, he'll he succeeded with one of them. But he is still a character that was not good or bad. The shades of grey and the moral dilemma was so interesting to watch. And if you think about it, it was the others that double crossed Ikaris. He lived all these years alone to keep  Ajak's secret, tried to protect his family and hoped one day he would go back to his home and live with his loved ones. And one day the rest tell him that they have abandoned their mission, want to stay here and his whole purpose in life was just gone. And dude is a loyal soldier, too loyal. And even his final act, flying to the sun, made sense because he is a soldier and his purpose was ripped off him and it was his decision.  So who he was at the end? Really beautifully crafted character. And a fantastic, heartbreaking performance by Madden.

 

And Cerci was a well written character too but I just questioned her motivation the whole time. I didn't really care about the love triangle. But her willingly sacrificing all the other billion of life's that could have been born because she grew close to a human sounds egoistic and self centered to me.

 

Maybe Cerci could take a couple of lessons from King though. Dude handled things better than any other from the team. And he was  also very funny.

 

Makkari was another fantastic character, really loved her and her big scene, where her rage allows her to be a threat to freaking Ikaris, was great. Druig, Thena and Sprite were nice too. Pastor was the one underdeveloped character for me. Maybe Zhao should have save some character for the sequel? 

 

Anyway, that was fantastic and I want to see it again.

[Legion Again]

So the voice with Dane is confirmed to be Blade. I have to admit I’m more excited than I thought I would be to see the black Knight+moon knight+blade+werewolf part of the universe begin to shape up.

[Cap]

After sitting with it for a couple hours, I feel like 99% of the film’s quote/unquote Issues would’ve been fixed if they just dropped Kit Harrington’s character. He’s pretty superfluous and that like 5-10 minutes out of the film with him gone would’ve tighten everything up. 

[Legion Again]

3 minutes ago, Cap said:

After sitting with it for a couple hours, I feel like 99% of the film’s quote/unquote Issues would’ve been fixed if they just dropped Kit Harrington’s character. He’s pretty superfluous and that like 5-10 minutes out of the film with him gone would’ve tighten everything up. 

I think this is one of those things like shield in Iron Man 2 and infinity stone stuff in AoU where it might not be the best for the movie as a stand-alone but it’s the best place to introduce some stuff for like 4 years down the line. I know some people have philosophical objections or whatever to that sort of thing, but I am A-ok with them — when I rewatch this in 2028 before Avengers vs X-men: house of secret wars I will probably go “oh yeah, this is where they introduced Black Knight, season 2 of that show was awesome” rather than “what is this guy doing here.”

[poweranimals]

I just realized that this movie kinda makes Thanos' plan not seem so bad since it outright prevented the emergence.

 

12 minutes ago, Cap said:

After sitting with it for a couple hours, I feel like 99% of the film’s quote/unquote Issues would’ve been fixed if they just dropped Kit Harrington’s character. He’s pretty superfluous and that like 5-10 minutes out of the film with him gone would’ve tighten everything up. 

You know, I think you might be right. 😲

Edited November 5, 2021 by poweranimals

[Legion Again]

I think the film’s biggest problem is that Sersi doesn’t have much personality or character arc, and cutting Dane probably makes that even worse. 

[Cap]

6 minutes ago, Eternal Legion said:

I think this is one of those things like shield in Iron Man 2 and infinity stone stuff in AoU where it might not be the best for the movie as a stand-alone but it’s the best place to introduce some stuff for like 4 years down the line. I know some people have philosophical objections or whatever to that sort of thing, but I am A-ok with them — when I rewatch this in 2028 before Avengers vs X-men: house of secret wars I will probably go “oh yeah, this is where they introduced Black Knight, season 2 of that show was awesome” rather than “what is this guy doing here.”

The difference is the shield and Iron Man II was like two seconds. 
 

If he had gone along with him on their mission, similar to how Trevor stayed with the group and ended up being important, I might agree with you. But him being in the first 10 minutes of the movie, and then not showing up again? That just doesn’t sit with me. 
 

And I think if you were moved him, you wouldn’t lose any of the Sersi and Ikaris stuff. Since they kind of operated like he wasn’t even there anyway. 

[Cap]

2 minutes ago, Eternal Legion said:

I think the film’s biggest problem is that Sersi doesn’t have much personality or character arc, and cutting Dane probably makes that even worse. 

Giiiiiiiiirl

 

[poweranimals]

3 minutes ago, Eternal Legion said:

I think the film’s biggest problem is that Sersi doesn’t have much personality or character arc, and cutting Dane probably makes that even worse. 

That's also a valid point. Sersi did have kind of a dull personality. I don't really know much about the Black Knight though but I thought he was supposed to be a man out of time like Cap which honestly would've been more interesting and would've made sense given the different time periods but whatever.

[Legion Again]

1 minute ago, Cap said:

Giiiiiiiiirl

 

Hah! Didn’t realize that would be a spicy take in any way.   
 

I like Sersi fine and I’m looking forward to seeing more, but the other 9 had more distinctive personalities (well, 8 — Ajax wasn’t too interesting but that’s different considering she doesn’t have to do much before dying). Sersi felt like “generically good person learns some surprising and upsetting stuff, is surprised and upset, reacts by doing generic good person stuff.”

[Valonqar]

I'd drop Thena in a heartbeat instead of Dane. Jolie phoned it in and her character's "seizures" were annoying. Plus, she got Gilgamesh killed, who while underdeveloped af at least had likable personality and chemistry with the rest of the cast (which she didn't).  She got outclassed by 75% of the cast.

 

I hate Phastos for that ridiculous outburst while he was chaining Ikaris. As already pointed out, Ikaris was betrayed too, in fact he was tragic. There was not a hint that he and Phastos were in some deep conflict and then, out of blue, Phastos starts to yell "I should have cut your wings log time ago! AAAAAAAAGH!" [cue bad overacting]. Get out. There were other characters who were defending "what they loved" without acting deranged. Fuck him, goes from nooo, they don't deserve our help muh atomic bomb to this shit. Awful character. Should have been turned into a human like Sprite so that he isn't in sequels. 

 

I couldn't stand Sprite either. The actress was bad, her motivation was ridiculous, basically she wanted to be an adult so that she could shack it up with Ikaris, and that annoying Peter Pan look they picked for her (subtlety of a sledgehammer). The theater burst in an applause when Druig knocked her out with a stone and quipped "That was moving" after her BS "please have sympathy for me" speech. Good riddance.

 

Can't praise Kingo and Karun enough. Outclassed everyone. Every joke landed like a charm. Also, Kingo's motivation for leaving was really good. He believed that Tiamat (sp?) should have been born but he didn't want his beliefs to clash with his love for his Eternal family. BTW, is it me or he was Bollywood version of Vin Diesel cause his action franchise has those "family" quotes? But yeah, great GREAT character, little vain (he didn't dance as much as smoothed his hair every 3 seconds lol), very loyal, perhaps the most loyal of the bunch, and very emphatic (eg, picking up on Sprite's unrequited love for Ikaris). I didn't like Sprite but I loved her and Kingo friendship. It was unexpected and it worked unlike Sprite and Sersi that really didn't. Kumail has chemistry with everyone so easy to pair him up with anyone, and is also such a natural actor. You don't see him act. 

 

The more I think about Ikaris the sadder I get. He was more betrayed than anyone. Also, what a bunch of hypocrites Eternals are. They didn't cry a river over those humanoid aliens we saw in a flashback but drew the line at humans cause how fuckin convenient! Ajak decided to rebel against the order she dutifully performed without any moral dilemma until it was muh humans, even though aliens in question didn't seem much different (and as we've seen in Marvelverse, they mostly are humans light - Talos, Gamora, Nebula, Xandar people, Kree, etc, no difference). Fuck these robots except Kingo and Ikaris who aren't 2-faced bitches. 

 

Oh and don't get me started on "gulp, we shouldn't have done that to Tiamat (sp?) after all, he made us One" or whatever that was. I mean it in the sense that it makes the movie interesting for debate, that whatever they did (allow the emergence or kill the new Celestial) the choice was wrong. Someone who didn't have to die died and they knew it. 

 

I think that turning Sprite from a robot to a human was too much but I'll take it cause that means bye bye Sprite.

 

Emergence from the ocean is gonna have an impact on Atlantis somehow right? (Wakanda Forever speculation)

 

Deviants were terrible. Sorry Papa Feige but how could you think "Oscar" when, in the first 5-10 minutes, those wire dogs or whatever they were made the movie look like a Razzie contender? Bad villains even by Marvel standard of badness and a very muddled attempt to make them sympathetic for about 5 seconds didn't help the matter.

 

Ajak's death was pretty nasty. It would have been better if Deviants didn't have that stupid wire design but actual weight to them to look menacing. I couldn't take them seriously. They looked completely off. 

 

I still don't get some of the powers that Eternals have in order to fight Deviants. Like Druig's mind control. Correct me if I'm wrong but when did he mind-control a single Deviant?

 

For a movie that's all about love for humans, ancient humans were shown as mindless drones, either incapable of defending themselves, or just walking around with dumb smiles on their faces. So why did Eternals love them so much?

 

Bonus: Ikaris speaks bad Babylonian with Scottish accent. "I am beautiful"