TServo2049 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Steven Spielberg is almost singlehandedly responsible for PG-13. (Yes, I know Gremlins was Joe Dante, but remember who produced it...) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mojoguy Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Why did this have to be a prequel? Ugh. Change Hugh Jackman into Hook, and get rid of Indiana Jones wannabe Hook and this movie would probably be a 1000 times better. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TServo2049 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Yeah, when I first heard the original announcements and stuff, I thought Jackman WAS going to be Hook! It wasn't until I saw the trailers that I realized Jackman was Blackbeard, and Garrett Hedlund was Hook. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MovieMan89 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Why did this have to be a prequel? Ugh. Change Hugh Jackman into Hook, and get rid of Indiana Jones wannabe Hook and this movie would probably be a 1000 times better. When I first heard Jackman was in this I totally thought he was playing Hook. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dudalb Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 I think everybody did. But even if he was Hook Jackman would still have the problem that any actor playing a over the top pirate would have: trying not to look like you are ripping off Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow. And you KNOW that the Hook plotline in the now DOA sequels would be a lame reclycing of the Anakin Skywalker/.Obi Wan storyline from Star Wars . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TServo2049 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 (edited) How is an over-the-top scenery-chewing villain anything like a perpetually drunk/stoned pirate Keith Richards? Why are all over-the-top pirates automatically assumed to be Jack Sparrow ripoffs? Judging from the trailers, just taking Jackman's Blackbeard performance, and dressing/making him up like Captain Morgan, would in itself yield at least a decent Hook. Edited October 8, 2015 by TServo2049 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Gittes Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 In the middle of the London Blitz, devious nuns sell orphan Peter Pan to a band of space pirates (some of whom are also clowns), who whisk him away to the mines of Neverland and the domain of Blackbeard, a time-traveling fascist dictator who huffs down crushed rock-form fairy dust in a vaporizer mask. Blackbeard has picket-fence teeth and skin like chalk, and he hops around in a suit of armor and calf-high red stockings while his pirates and child slaves bray “Smells Like Teen Spirit” from the mine pits below. His flying ships, fitted with searchlights, patrol Neverland, a volcanic island suspended in an expanse of interstellar cloud—home to bioelectric mermaids, flocks of flying fish, and natives who wear combat boots and yarn and bleed colored dust. Hugh Jackman, nominal star of Pan, plays Blackbeard as a towering diva, bald head covered in a discount Bela Lugosi wig, beard styled into a Van Dyke. Somehow, he isn’t even the strangest presence in the movie, at least not as long as Garrett Hedlund is on screen, playing Captain Hook as “Indiana Jones with severe lockjaw.” And neither of them really stands a chance against a backdrop that is effectively one big 3-D toy theater of kitsch and derivative aesthetics. One lazy Saturday night in January I'm gonna get really drunk and watch the shit out of this. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TServo2049 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 (edited) Most awesomely awful thing I've read in a while. The best cinematic turkeys are the ones which are absolutely balls-to-the-wall batshit insane (rather than just oppressively generic and boring and inept, like Fantastic Four). I don't know the next time something this bonkers will come along, at least as far as would-be blockbuster tentpoles. (The closest potential candidate I can think of would be The Great Wall - the short, vague summaries and rumors I've read make it sound like a hybrid of Pacific Rim and The 13th Warrior, which sounds pretty crazy to me. If not that, then maybe Valerian?) We will have to live-riff this sucker at some point. Edited October 8, 2015 by TServo2049 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack Nevada Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 lmao at the description ".. and Rooney Mara looking like she just came from Coachella" from the Double Toasted review. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avatree Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Pan and Hotel Transylvania 2 opening the same weekend here... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mojoguy Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 lmao at the description ".. and Rooney Mara looking like she just came from Coachella" from the Double Toasted review. Rooney Mara can compare notes with her sister about what to do after being in a flop movie. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragon Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Rooney Mara can compare notes with her sister about what to do after being in a flop movie. then laugh it up with all that NFL money they have "at least will still rich" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ozymandias Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 I like Kate Mara more than Rooney Mara. Hotter too. Now if only Hollywood would give her better roles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack Nevada Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 What's the good Kate Mara performance? She hasn't left an impression in anything I've seen her in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avatree Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 What's the good Kate Mara performance? She hasn't left an impression in anything I've seen her in. there isn't one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TServo2049 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 (edited) The Martian. I had no idea it was Kate Mara until I saw the credits - I had only heard of this Kate Mara as having done a poor job in Fantastic Four, I have never seen a movie with her in it before. She did a good job. Edited October 9, 2015 by TServo2049 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DAJK Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 I wonder how this is gonna do on its opening Tuesday at my theatre compared to opening day. Not just with family movies, but really any movie, Tuesdays are huge at my theatre. Looking through ticket sales over the past year, I've found a lot of similarities between our ticket sales and actual domestic box office "oh X amount of tickets sold is equivilant to $10M DOM." For example, The Martian opened to the equivilant of $43.5M but its Tuesday alone did $17.9M. It's way out of whack. Hotel Transylvania 2 opened to $59.1M and its first Tuesday was $18.5M. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WrathOfHan Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 What's the good Kate Mara performance? She hasn't left an impression in anything I've seen her in. She had her moments in House of Cards but I wouldn't call her anything special. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4815162342 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 One lazy Saturday night in January I'm gonna get really drunk and watch the shit out of this. I think we found the next BOF live watch movie 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Futurist Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Mara's sisters first actual jobs : Humanitarians. True Story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
