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SURV(IV)OR: Episode 1 - A Beastly Opening

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Spaghetti: Welcome to the brand new BOT Survivor! I’m your host, Sam, P. Ghetti. We’ve got a lot of awesome challenges for our contestants today, and believe me when I say, there will be blood! *pause* I’m kidding! The lawyers are having none of this! Anyways, we’ve got four boats coming, each with five of our contestants, and they should begin arriving about.....now.


*The first boat arrives, carrying AABATTERY, YourMother, CoolEric258, That One Guy, and Ethan Hunt.*


CoolEric258: Ugh, finally! Land! I swear, the ocean drives me so crazy. I better get that prize.

That One Guy: Hey, this is actually pretty fun! Don’t worry, check this out! *pulling a Jack from Titanic* I’m king of the World! *A gust of wind blows him over onto the ground of the ship* Yeowch!

YourMother: Yeah, there’s one more thing about the ocean. Lots of wind, you know?

AABATTERY: Yo Ethan, you good? You haven’t said a word since we got on the boat?

Ethan Hunt: Hey, thanks for asking, I’m doing fine, just need to think a little bit.

AABATTERY: Okay, just checkin’ on ya. *He walks away*

Ethan: Oh, just thinking about your weaknesses. Heh.


*They arrive. CoolEric258 kisses the dock*


Spaghetti: Uh....watch for splinters Eric. Anyways, welcome to the island! Head to the amphitheatre and wait for the others to arrive.

Ethan Hunt: With pleasure, Spag! By the way, your attire is pretty good today.

Spaghetti: Thanks, I guess? Look, if you’re trying to kiss up and bribe me, it won’t work.

Ethan Hunt: That’s what they all say...


*The five walk towards the theatre*


Spaghetti: So....with that. Another boat should be coming soon. *Indeed, it arrives. Its passengers? Arlborn, BourneFan#1, Eevin, WrathOfHan, Wrath.*


Wrath: So wait....your name is Wrath too?

WrathOfHan: Oh yeah, it totally is. And let me tell ya, there can be only one. *An awkward pause* Yo, I’m joking!

Wrath: *laughing* Oh, it’s totally fine! I would have retorted with a shotgun to your neck. *They laugh again, Wrath turns to the side* I wasn’t joking.

WrathOfHan: *to side* Gotta keep an eye on him. He reminds me of my dad for some reason, and I doubt that's a good thing.

Eevin: So....uh....Arlborn and BourneFan, right? Eevin. Nice to meet all of you.

Arlborn: Nice to meet you too! Now that intros are out of the way, let’s get an alliance going right away. We’ll take Bourne out immediately.

BourneFan: I heard that! Also, you may not even be on the same team!

Arlborn: I’ve seen this. There are only two teams, the odds are 50%. It’s a coin toss! *arriving on shore*

Spaghetti: Oh, we’ll see about that!

Arlborn: I’ve seen this show. Twists and turns abound, some things are always the same!

Spaghetti: Indeed they are! Welcome to the island everyone, head to the amphitheatre and wait for the rest of the participants.

WrathOfHan: A theatre? Wooooow. I hope we’re watching Hamilton.


Spaghetti: 10 arrived, 10 are left. Next boat should arrive soon. And what perfect timing!

*Boat three is here. DAJK, elcaballero, Fancyarcher, chasmmi, Slambros are on board.*


Elcaballero: I bet the island’s living conditions are just as glamorous as this boat.

DAJK: The boat isn’t glamorous at all.

Elcaballero: Seems I’ve got a lot to teach you about the art of sarcasm.

DAJK: Okay, just checking that you’re not one of those unbearably happy types.

Fancyarcher: Uh...you look familiar. And you’re acting a bit strange. You okay? You better not be plotting anything.

Chasmmi: Yes! I’m totally not a disgraced game show host masquerading as a contestant! I totally didn’t murder Dr. Baum, E.R. to get the position! What are you talking about?!?!?!

Chasmmi: *Aside.* Fancy knows what I’m capable of. My stupid defense worked. And I don’t fuck around. Be afraid, you unlucky 19. This prize is mine.

Slambros: *To camera* I had a lot of friends back home, but everyone here seems so strange. Hopefully I’m at least not the first person eliminated. I can blend in pretty easily with this.

Slambros: Hey, Chasmmi! Let's kill everyone! *chasmmi cringes, Slambros facepalms.* Stupid.


Spaghetti: Welcome to the island everyone!

Slambros: Spaghetti! Hello! I have something to share with you!

Spaghetti: Cool! What’s up?

Slambros: Uh....never mind. I should go.

Spaghetti: You got this! Now, let’s see when the stragglers make it.


*We cut to a very run down boat, the passengers are ChipMunky, RandomJC, 4815162342, Goffe, and JJ-8.

Numbers: Goffe! The Equation Sensation is back! Well, 66.67% of us are.

Goffe: Yeah, I miss Jim. Even if he was a bit of a straggler. *his phone rings.*

Jim Shorts: *from phone* I heard that!

Numbers: Anyways, we gotta stay together. Right?

Goffe: Indeed. Us against the world.

Chipmunky: Well, this is gonna be crazy. These competitions tend to be brutal. I can only hope that we can at least make it to the merge.

RandomJC: I’m kinda nervous, we’ll be like actual survivors! Will there be a shipwreck?

JJ-8: Don’t worry, it’s just a show. They won’t kill us! At least not without lawsuits.

RandomJC: I know, I was just kiddi--*They crash into the dock*


Spaghetti: Yikes! Telly! What did I tell you about not crashing into docks? Anyways, you know the drill, head to the amphitheatre. You’re the last to arrive, so get ready to start soon!

Goffe: The last ones, are you kidding me?

Spaghetti: I will kid you many times this season. This is not one of them.




*Cut to the amphitheatre.*


Spaghetti: Welcome to BOT Survivor! This weekend will test your guts, your wits, your abilities, your strength, and how evil you are. *chasmmi and Ethan Hunt glare at each other.*

Spaghetti: Now, I’ve prepared a brief presentation of the rules. *Read them yourselves ya lazy bums.*

Arloborn: We know the drill, just put us into teams. I wanna find out the 50% of people I’ll be up against.

Spaghetti: About that....you’ve all been split into teams randomly. Look under your seats.

WrathOfHan: Free car, awesome!

Spaghetti: Nope. But you will find....


Numbers: A red card?

YourMother: A green card?

ChipMunky: Red.

Eevin: Me too!

Ethan Hunt: Green.

Elcaballero: Make that three.

Chasmmi: Four, actually. *Glares at Ethan again*

Wrath: Red.

WrathOfHan: Red.

Both: God damnit!

Slambros: Uh...I’m colorblind.

Elcaballero: It’s green, and so is mine.

Goffe: Red! Numbers, the equation sensation unites!

Arlborn: And Red too!

DAJK: I’m Green!



CoolEric258: I

ThatOneGuy: didn’t

BourneFan: get

Fancyarcher: a

RandomJC: colored

JJ-8: card!


Spaghetti: Don’t worry, it’s all part of the plan! First, Red Cards, get together.

Arlborn: Together again! Together forever! *singing*

Eevin: This was a mistake. We better get to the final two.

Spaghetti: The seven of you are....




Spaghetti: Green cards, you’re next.

Elcaballero: Wait, there’s only six of us, no fair!

Spaghetti: Don’t worry, I’ll make an android to follow you around. You are...




Spaghetti: So that leaves the no-carders. Well, for the first time in Survivor history, 7 people are kicked off right off the bat!

*The seven no-carders gasp.*

Spaghetti: I’m kidding! What I meant to say was.....there will be THREE teams competing.

Arlborn: Whaaaattt?!?!?!?!?!




Spaghetti: Now, you can go to your cabins! Aliens get the red cabin, Robots get the green, and Toons get the blue.

Spaghetti: Also, there’s a confessional booth over there should you want to reveal your deepest darkest secrets.


CONFESSIONAL - Arlborn: Obviously my irrestible charm will get me far.

CONFESSIONAL - Slambros: This is gonna be a nightmare. I can’t believe I took that dare and signed up.

CONFESSIONAL - RandomJC: Everyone here seems nice! I doubt anyone will backstab us horrible.

CONFESSIONAL - Ethan Hunt: Except me, of course. But chasmmi could steal my thunder, especially since there’s only four of us. Gotta be careful here.


Spaghetti: Rest up a bit, your first challenge begins in an hour!


*In the AA Cabin*

Arlborn: Hey....so, Numbers! Goffe! Want an alliance with me and Eevin?

Numbers: Well, maybe once we get to know each other better, we know you won’t trick us, maybe then....

Goffe: No. Not gonna happen. Get lost, mate.

Arlborn: I may just win you over yet. As I did with Eevin here!

Eevin: I sort of didn’t have a choice.

Chipmunky: Guess I should just rest a bit before the challenge...hey, keep it down! *There's a commotion in the bunk below.

WrathOfHan: Yo, Wrath. This is MY bunk.

Wrath: Look, I’m sorry I got tense earlier. I just want us to have a good relationship.

WrathOfHan: Sorry, I’m straight.

Wrath: Not that way, smartass! And brush your hair! You look like you just got out of bed!

WrathOfHan: Ugh, you're not my father!


*In the RR Cabin*

Ethan Hunt: Hm....I need an army of idiots. Who can I get on our team that will follow my every order. But are actually competent.

Slambros: Uh....guess this is my bunk. *It is easily the worst in the cabin, all the others have been taken.*

YourMother: Hey, want this bunk, Slambros? I can trade.

Slambros: No, it’s fine. My older brother made me sleep like this anyway. If anything, this is a tempur-pedic compared to what I used to sleep in.

Elcaballero: Ugh....these sleeping conditions suuuccccckkkkk.

YourMother: *cough*crybaby*cough*

Elcaballero: I heard that.

Chasmmi: SHUT IT! I’m trying to nap!

DAJK: Why, need your 22 hours of beauty sleep? We best hope it’s 24.

Chasmmi: *to self.* Note to self: DAJK must go first.

DAJK: My sister thinks I'd be first too. If I get to prove you wrong as well, it'll be better than Christmas.


*In the TT Cabin.*

RandomJC: Well, I guess I always wanted to go camping.

That One Guy: You’ve never been? Man, it’s so fun. I used to camp with my best friends every summer. We should have a bonfire tonight! Of course, provided none of us get eliminated right off of the -


That One Guy: Okay...so anyways, JC -

CoolEric258: GOING IN FOR A LANDING! CANNONBALL! *He dives onto the bunk above RandomJC and That One Guy, hitting his head on the bed.*

RandomJC: Ouch! You alright!

CoolEric258: Never been better! I’ll just sleep it off! *He successfully gets onto the bunk above, snoring loudly.*

Fancyarcher: At least now we have an easily most hated member of our team. *looking at JJ-8* and possibly two.

AABATTERY: As long as it’s not me, I’m Gucci.

Fancyarcher: Do me a favor. Never use that word again.

AABATTERY: Oh boy, you’re one of THOSE people.

BourneFan#1: I’m not sure how long we can rest. The challenge could start any minute.

AABATTERY: Relax, mate. We just got here, the challenge won’t start any time ----


*A siren bellows.*

BourneFan#1: You were saying?

Spaghetti: Campers! Head to the beach asap! Your first challenge begins now!





Welcome to the first challenge of the game. This shall be an excellent barometer of where the strength of teams lies, as well as the first person off the island. We had our best sand architects create the world’s biggest sand castle, one that is totally structurally sound. Provided not too many people are in it. Use the knowledge hidden inside the castle to do the following:





Beauty and the Beast

The Belko Experiment

Kong: Skull Island


Before I Fall

The Shack

Table 19

Get Out

Rock Dog

Fist Fight


Make it to the pavilion on the beach to make your prediction, but be careful, a beast is hiding in the castle, and he’ll try to sabotage you in any way. He won’t kill you, but if you’re not on an active lookout, he’s certain to capture you. (i.e. if you don’t predict!)


Predict by Thursday, March 16th at 11:59PM EST.


Spaghetti: First place, the team with the highest average, gets three coins for each member to spend at the tuck shop! Perfect for a little treat, or perhaps giving youself a boost or providing a nice dose of sabotage.

*Arlborn gives an evil smile to BourneFan*

Spaghetti: Of course, first place gets immunity as well.

Spaghetti: Second place team gets nothing to spend at the tuck shop, but they’re safe this week.

That One Guy: 66.67% chances of immunity. I like that!

Numbers: Actually, one team has six members as opposed to 7. It's a 70% chance of safety for them, as opposed to 65% for the other teams, considering safety as a measure of which team contains the eliminated person. Doing the math, we find the answer is a bit more complicated.

That One Guy: Ugh....shut up.

DAJK: I'm actually quite impressed.

Spaghetti: And finally, our unlucky third place team.

*elcaballero gulps*

Spaghetti: The losing team will go to the intense tribal council, where players will vote off one player to go home. Their weakest link, if you will.

Slambros: Wait, what if the castle collapses?

Spaghetti: You'll live, we'll get you out! Probably would get a crappy score, though, so be alert. Also, One more thing I forgot to mention....




Throughout the game, there will be several mini challenges. These are completely optional, but can provide a boost in weekly scores and give a team the winning edge. However, mess this up and you could pay the price later.



Kong: Skull Island


John Wick: Chapter Two

Hidden Figures

La La Land


The deadline is TUESDAY AT 11:59PM EST. 


The team with the highest percentage of participation, along with the two highest predictors of the challenge. Will all receive a boost in the weekly challenge. BE CAREFUL. The lowest two predictors will receive a detriment to their weekly challenge!


Spaghetti: With that, the challenge begins....NOW.

Chasmmi: Wait, where's our android?




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1 minute ago, BourneFan #1 said:

We're barely on the island and people already want me out. :sadben:

Don't be so hard on yourself, I'm sure everyone loves you! :ph34r:


Just not as much as they love me though.


Let the games begin!

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Archer, you know you love me. Keep on spreading lies, but the truth will come out. [emoji14][emoji12][emoji854]

Anyways Flash Fight predicts:
Kong: 1,305 [emoji529]
Logan: 900 [emoji191]
Wick: 175 ☠️[emoji190]
Figures: 185 [emoji930]
Land: 165 [emoji443]
Collide: 10 [emoji90]

[emoji492], I know you didn't ask Collide, but IDGAF YOLo ?

TBH, not super confident in my answers but go big, go home, amiright? I'll do the other questions probably tomorrow or Thursday.

Love y'all and may the best man win!

*Leaves to go stare at the palm trees*

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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1 minute ago, Arlborn said:

Don't be so hard on yourself, I'm sure everyone loves you! :ph34r:


Just not as much as they love me though.


Let the games begin!


Arlborn gives an evil smile to BourneFan

Arlborn: Nice to meet you too! Now that intros are out of the way, let’s get an alliance going right away. We’ll take Bourne out immediately.


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8 minutes ago, CoolEric258 said:

Archer, you know you love me. Keep on spreading lies, but the truth will come out. emoji14.pngemoji12.pngemoji854.png

Anyways Flash Fight predicts:
Kong: 1,305 emoji529.png
Logan: 900 emoji191.png
Wick: 175 ☠️emoji190.png
Figures: 185 emoji930.png
Land: 165 emoji443.png
Collide: 10 emoji90.png

emoji492.png, I know you didn't ask Collide, but IDGAF YOLo ?

TBH, not super confident in my answers but go big, go home, amiright? I'll do the other questions probably tomorrow or Thursday.

Love y'all and may the best man win!

*Leaves to go stare at the palm trees*

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Do we put our weekly challenge predictions here?

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Lmao why tf did I put savage and weak as words to describe my character :lol:


then again, my sister did say when I asked her "how would you describe me if I was on survivor"

"wouldn't have time to describe you cause you'd be voted off so quick"

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